Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
 
Old 02-01-2012, 11:46 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,034,272 times
Reputation: 11862

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by LS Jaun View Post
"I would also understand if he was bisexual,and needed to be with aman from time to time."
This is a very unpopular view in society and with most woman I'm fine with it because I don't feel the need to place my values on others!
Well at least some women are open-minded about it...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 02-01-2012, 11:53 AM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
11,364 posts, read 9,277,086 times
Reputation: 52582
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whyte Byrd View Post
I shudder to think. What about all the diseases and people who are carriers of things like venereal warts--which you can't cure--and things like that? Condoms break. Things happen. It's so dangerous.
Condoms rarely break. Probably never if you know how to use them.

So you have one partner and if that doesn't work out then what, no sex anymore ever?

The fact is most relationships do not work out and most people end up having multiple partners during their life anyway.

I can see polyamory working as long as you get tested and no one is cheating outside the group.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 11:55 AM
 
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,000,387 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by John13 View Post
Condoms rarely break. Probably never if you know how to use them.

So you have one partner and if that doesn't work out then what, no sex anymore ever?

The fact is most relationships do not work out and most people end up having multiple partners during their life anyway.

I can see polyamory working as long as you get tested and no one is cheating outside the group.
Maybe I'm strange but I've never had sex not work out in even a bad relationship so I can't relate here. I know the problem exists. You hear enough complaints about it.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 11:56 AM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
11,364 posts, read 9,277,086 times
Reputation: 52582
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
This issue has nothing to do with open-mindedness. It is about preferences. A couple that chooses an open marriage is not more open-minded than a couple that opts for a monogamous marriage. Open-mindedness is about realizing that just because something feels right to you doesn't mean it feels right to everyone else.

I had an open-relationship with my first boyfriend while we were in college. For us - it was because we were both growing and changing while at separate colleges - and even though we still loved each other, we were basically falling out of love with each other. It was too hard for us to not date other people and have life experiences while we were many states away from each other. We are still best friends and we don't regret any of the decisions we made. I'm not saying that this is the reason that some couples opt for an open marriage - because I know it is not. All I'm saying is that the people that choose to have a monogamous relationship are not more close minded - it's just what they prefer. I had an open relationship with my ex but there is no way in hell I would have one with my husband. It wouldn't be right for us.
I meant more open-minded in the context of non-monogamy.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 11:59 AM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
11,364 posts, read 9,277,086 times
Reputation: 52582
Quote:
Originally Posted by Whyte Byrd View Post
Maybe I'm strange but I've never had sex not work out in even a bad relationship so I can't relate here. I know the problem exists. You hear enough complaints about it.
Okay, I guess I'l have to clarify:

The relationship not working out for whatever reason. When it doesn't work out as what happens in most cases you move on to the next, then the next. You get the idea. That equals multiple partners.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 12:00 PM
 
14,294 posts, read 13,183,246 times
Reputation: 17797
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
This issue has nothing to do with open-mindedness.
It doesn't have to be. But it CAN be. There is one poster on this thread who demonstrates a case in point that if you have an open marriage you aren't in *true* love.

There are definitely people who havw a strong bias against.

I see the world of responsible non-monogamy today as similar to the way things were for homosexuals in days past. People don't want anyone to know. People don't want their children to be exposed to backlash in the community.

To expand the topic somewhat passed just open, I think that given that something of 60% of marriages experience cheating, I think people have an even harder time with Poly and PolyFi. Wanting a little bit of side tail makes some sense to some, one might think based on the cheating stats. But POLY? That's pure insanity.

There are way more of these folks than most people know.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 12:01 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,639,083 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by John13 View Post
Okay, I guess I'l have to clarify:

The relationship not working out for whatever reason. When it doesn't work out as what happens in most cases you move on to the next, then the next. You get the idea. That equals multiple partners.
That's why you don't get married until you KNOW that your relationship with your spouse is going to work out to the point that you will stay with them forever (until death, etc.)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 12:05 PM
 
Location: Baltimore, MD
11,364 posts, read 9,277,086 times
Reputation: 52582
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucario View Post
That's why you don't get married until you KNOW that your relationship with your spouse is going to work out to the point that you will stay with them forever (until death, etc.)
When I got married I thought I knew, that goes for many others who got married as well. Things happen, that is why people break up and the divorce rate is so high.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 12:08 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,639,083 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by John13 View Post
When I got married I thought I knew, that goes for many others who got married as well. Things happen, that is why people break up and the divorce rate is so high.
I understand that as well. But I also believe that those who want to, or do, stray from their marriage contribute to that high divorce rate.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 02-01-2012, 01:00 PM
 
Location: USA
31,010 posts, read 22,051,613 times
Reputation: 19067
Quote:
Originally Posted by John13 View Post
When I got married I thought I knew, that goes for many others who got married as well. Things happen, that is why people break up and the divorce rate is so high.
Like they say "Love is Blind" or at least "thats what the man says".

Once the chemical high of new love wears of the grim reality is you have a disgruntled spouse who you have very little in common with! try making that work.

People act like Divorce is a bad thing. Divorce is an escape from misery and to many it is a great escape! People should not feel forced by society to endure a crappy life because of a false sense of success (marriage). We all see them: Unhappy friends sticking out for no good reason. This describes my friend and his wife: “Lets go around and call ourselves successful because I’m in a perpetual state a misery living with someone I can’t stand!”.

This does not apply to everyone of course.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:46 PM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top