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Old 02-02-2012, 11:37 AM
 
Location: Virginia Beach
8,346 posts, read 7,041,850 times
Reputation: 2874

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucario View Post
Do as you like - but if you think sex is just as unimportant in a couple's married life as chess, tennis or golf, you are truly twisted.
To me, sex is very important to a couple's life.

However, that doesn't mean that sex should stay exclusive to the couple.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:39 AM
 
Location: Hell, NY
3,187 posts, read 5,149,530 times
Reputation: 5704
Quote:
Originally Posted by DentalFloss View Post
It's just sex. Would you mind your spouse playing chess, or tennis, or golf with another person? For us, that's no different.

For many people including I, that is not a fair comparison. Some hold sex with their loved one as sacred. I think your minimizing what for some means a whole lot more than it does obviously for you.

That's great that for you sex is equivalent to playing tennis. But for a majority of us, it means much more.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:43 AM
 
2,677 posts, read 2,616,093 times
Reputation: 1491
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucario View Post
I get that you and your wife have mutual consent, but I don't know anyone else who feels the way you do.
I know hundreds of such people. I know of millions.

Quote:
The idea of my wife being with with anyone other than me sickens and enrages me at the same time.
Then I suggest you do not try it.

Quote:
Says me - and the vast majority of humanity.
The vast majority of humanity does not jump out of airplanes for fun, probably including you. Are you going to tell those who do that they're wrong?
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:43 AM
 
1,206 posts, read 1,737,657 times
Reputation: 974
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
Never had an experience in open relationships (or any type of romantic relationship for that matter) but I'm just wondering if, from experience/your own reckoning, you think they might actually be more durable, resilient and strong than strictly exclusive or monogamous relationships? I mean there might be less tension, less suspicion, and if sex is treated as sex, it won't damage the bond they have? Does having sex with another always damage that bond they have with each other? Varies with people, I know...it's probably better on one hand, but worse on the other because there's the potential that an emotional connection could be formed through sex.

Basically, though, do you think it's a more 'enlightened' form of relationship, or basically an excuse to be promiscuous?
Can't answer these questions, but I will say this. Very few animals are monogamous (one mate):

gibbons
swans
black vultures
french angelfish
wolves
albatross
termites
prairie voles
turtle doves
schistosoma mansoni worms
bald eagles


Millions are polygamous (more than one mate), including humans.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:43 AM
 
14,294 posts, read 13,183,246 times
Reputation: 17797
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucario View Post
I get that you and your wife have mutual consent, but I don't know anyone else who feels the way you do. The idea of my wife being with with anyone other than me sickens and enrages me at the same time.
How about me?
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:45 AM
 
2,677 posts, read 2,616,093 times
Reputation: 1491
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
That's great that for you sex is equivalent to playing tennis. But for a majority of us, it means much more.
That's fine. The difference is, I'm not telling you that your way is wrong. As you've seen on this thread (though I don't know if you're guilty of it yourself), there are many who tell us our way is wrong.

Your way is fine for you. Our way is fine for us. Viva la difference.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:48 AM
 
2,677 posts, read 2,616,093 times
Reputation: 1491
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucario View Post
Do as you like - but if you think sex is just as unimportant in a couple's married life as chess, tennis or golf, you are truly twisted.
Then I am twisted. Except I prefer to think of it as merely 'different'.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:48 AM
 
Location: Land of Thought and Flow
8,323 posts, read 15,165,636 times
Reputation: 4957
Quote:
Originally Posted by supermanpansy View Post
That's great that for you sex is equivalent to playing tennis. But for a majority of us, it means much more.
Sex with my other is like playing a video game together. Sex with my husband is on a whole 'nother level.

It's all about the experience and intent, really.
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Old 02-02-2012, 11:51 AM
 
14,294 posts, read 13,183,246 times
Reputation: 17797
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucario View Post
Do as you like - but if you think sex is just as unimportant in a couple's married life as chess, tennis or golf, you are truly twisted.
This annoys me. (Aside from being an ad hom that I probably ought to report.) A college frat boy does it, and it is considered perfectly normal.

What is twisted is this society's puritanical hysteria over sexual matters.
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Old 02-02-2012, 12:05 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,639,083 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by Phantasy Tokoro View Post
To me, sex is very important to a couple's life.

However, that doesn't mean that sex should stay exclusive to the couple.
Again, iyho. If they're married, that's what I believe. If it works for you to not see it that way, that's OK for you.
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