How do ugly people get dates? (age, nice, never, physical)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
You're an unattractive woman? Says who? Who was the who ever said this for you to think it?
I know that sounds funny! I've just never felt like a regular person. By the time I was 12, I had already been voted ugliest girl in the class (small town, everyone knew everyone else) and I was horribly overtall--six feet by the time I was 14. No one ever wanted to go out with me. Finally in my 20s I met someone who didn't seem to care about my height or my looks--mainly because he was a drunk with a gambling problem who rightly guessed that by paying me a little attention, he'd be able to get me to support him and take his abuse. That lasted about sixteen years. We did have a daughter, and she is now grown and wonderful, and oddly enough, she is beautiful, physically as well as personally. (When people meet her or see her picture, they unfailingly gasp and say, "That's YOUR daughter?" By now, it's just amusing to me. I've built a shell around my heart and such remarks can't really hurt me anymore.)
Ignoring history, I tried to date using online sources after the divorce, but I came to realize that alcoholics are the only men available to someone like me, and I won't do that again. I will stay alone. The only other interest I've ever had are married men looking to cheat, and I guess they figure I'll be grateful and since they wouldn't go out in public anyway, they don't have to worry about being seen with someone like me.
Just to be clear--I do what I can to make myself presentable--hairstyle, makeup, and the like. I got something I never wanted--a decent career and salary, out of the necessity of having to pay off bookies and drug dealers and bar tabs and the IRS as well as raise a daughter for so many years! But I am 54 now, or will be next week, and my opportunities were pretty much zero in my youth. At this age, they are less than that.
And you know what? Along with that sadness of never having been loved, there's a little bit of anger, too. I was a good wife despite being badly treated--I would have been a good woman for any man. But I was too tall and not pretty enough that anyone wanted to be seen with me, and in the end, that's the number one thing that matters.
I know that sounds funny! I've just never felt like a regular person. By the time I was 12, I had already been voted ugliest girl in the class (small town, everyone knew everyone else) and I was horribly overtall--six feet by the time I was 14. No one ever wanted to go out with me. Finally in my 20s I met someone who didn't seem to care about my height or my looks--mainly because he was a drunk with a gambling problem who rightly guessed that by paying me a little attention, he'd be able to get me to support him and take his abuse. That lasted about sixteen years. We did have a daughter, and she is now grown and wonderful, and oddly enough, she is beautiful, physically as well as personally. (When people meet her or see her picture, they unfailingly gasp and say, "That's YOUR daughter?" By now, it's just amusing to me. I've built a shell around my heart and such remarks can't really hurt me anymore.)
Who the heck made that vote possible? That's so downright cruel to judge a human being like that.
Ignoring history, I tried to date using online sources after the divorce, but I came to realize that alcoholics are the only men available to someone like me, and I won't do that again. I will stay alone. The only other interest I've ever had are married men looking to cheat, and I guess they figure I'll be grateful and since they wouldn't go out in public anyway, they don't have to worry about being seen with someone like me.
I'm sure you're so much better than that but you need to stop putting yourself down IMO.
Just to be clear--I do what I can to make myself presentable--hairstyle, makeup, and the like. I got something I never wanted--a decent career and salary, out of the necessity of having to pay off bookies and drug dealers and bar tabs and the IRS as well as raise a daughter for so many years! But I am 54 now, or will be next week, and my opportunities were pretty much zero in my youth. At this age, they are less than that.
So sorry about your past, but your future even at 54 years old is what you make of it.
And you know what? Along with that sadness of never having been loved, there's a little bit of anger, too. I was a good wife despite being badly treated--I would have been a good woman for any man. But I was too tall and not pretty enough that anyone wanted to be seen with me, and in the end, that's the number one thing that matters.
Maybe you have been at the wrong place at the wrong times for some of your life. Also many people out there even some people here in this forum reading this probably can relate about never having been felt loved and the bit of anger that goes along with it. But why you feel that you're not pretty enough? Maybe it's from your early childhood when they tastelessly voted you the ugliest and its somehow consumed you all of this time? - arggggg to those responsible for this and they'll get theirs (if they haven't by now) as what goes around comes around!. About you being tall, it's 2012 and shorter Men do date and or marry taller Women these days. Also any Woman can have a suitable Man in their life if they want to that is and you cannot convince me you're inferior - sorry but just no way.
I know that sounds funny! I've just never felt like a regular person. By the time I was 12, I had already been voted ugliest girl in the class (small town, everyone knew everyone else) and I was horribly overtall--six feet by the time I was 14. No one ever wanted to go out with me. Finally in my 20s I met someone who didn't seem to care about my height or my looks--mainly because he was a drunk with a gambling problem who rightly guessed that by paying me a little attention, he'd be able to get me to support him and take his abuse. That lasted about sixteen years. We did have a daughter, and she is now grown and wonderful, and oddly enough, she is beautiful, physically as well as personally. (When people meet her or see her picture, they unfailingly gasp and say, "That's YOUR daughter?" By now, it's just amusing to me. I've built a shell around my heart and such remarks can't really hurt me anymore.)
Ignoring history, I tried to date using online sources after the divorce, but I came to realize that alcoholics are the only men available to someone like me, and I won't do that again. I will stay alone. The only other interest I've ever had are married men looking to cheat, and I guess they figure I'll be grateful and since they wouldn't go out in public anyway, they don't have to worry about being seen with someone like me.
Just to be clear--I do what I can to make myself presentable--hairstyle, makeup, and the like. I got something I never wanted--a decent career and salary, out of the necessity of having to pay off bookies and drug dealers and bar tabs and the IRS as well as raise a daughter for so many years! But I am 54 now, or will be next week, and my opportunities were pretty much zero in my youth. At this age, they are less than that.
And you know what? Along with that sadness of never having been loved, there's a little bit of anger, too. I was a good wife despite being badly treated--I would have been a good woman for any man. But I was too tall and not pretty enough that anyone wanted to be seen with me, and in the end, that's the number one thing that matters.
So I guess you disagree with the popular myth around here that women can get sex anytime they want, anyplace.
Maybe you have been at the wrong place at the wrong times for some of your life. Also many people out there even some people here in this forum reading this probably can relate about never having been felt loved and the bit of anger that goes along with it. But why you feel that you're not pretty enough? Maybe it's from your early childhood when they tastelessly voted you the ugliest and its somehow consumed you all of this time? - arggggg to those responsible for this and they'll get theirs (if they haven't by now) as what goes around comes around!. About you being tall, it's 2012 and shorter Men do date and or marry taller Women these days. Also any Woman can have a suitable Man in their life if they want to that is and you cannot convince me you're inferior - sorry but just no way.
Happy 54th Birthday! (which is August 1, 2012).
Thank you!
This is awful...but the kid who throughout high school led the charge on making fun of me dropped dead of a heart attack at the age of 50, and I didn't feel bad about it at all. Also noticed in his obituary that he left no wife/partner or children, so maybe life didn't work out that well for him. He was a good-looking guy, too.
It was just kind of true, though. I wore glasses, I had braces, I had terrible acne that lasted past the teenage years, I have wavy/frizzy hair, and that was especially a no-no in the 70s when long straight hair was the only acceptable hair to have. As I said, I learned to manage and make myself presentable, but I cannot make myself really attractive. I just don't have the raw material.
At any rate, there's also the looming fact that there was simply no one interested. No one asked me out. No one was ever interested in me that way. Never in my life have I had the experience where a man approached me because something about me interested him and asked me to go out on a "date", like to a movie or for coffee or anything. That is just something I have never experienced--and I sure as heck don't think it's gonna happen now! LOL.
I do notice that the younger generation seems to have less of an issue with "rules" about a man being taller than a woman. I see young couples quite a bit these days where the girl is a few inches taller. I'm happy to see it.
I am sad after reading that,mightyqueen...I doubt you are ugly and being tall is no crime, look at those models...I think if you feel ugly, your selfesteem is low and you attract losers and fools. So it's a vicious circle you get into. There's nothing wrong with being alone, it's just a shame you feel no one can love you for you. You sound like a great person who had a tough life. But you do have a beautiful daughter and sound like you are a wonderful mom to her and that's priceless. You are worth just as much as anyone else and worth way more than some of those idiots you seem to attract.
Happy birthday, I hope you can do something nice for you! you deserve it!
I think she'd want more genuineness from a relationship than just having sex - I stand to be corrected.
Well, of course. We had a rash of threads this week, though, in which people insisted women could get sex at the drop of a hat, all women have to do is walk out the door.
So I guess you disagree with the popular myth around here that women can get sex anytime they want, anyplace.
ROFL. I've seen those posts.
I used to work on 42nd Street in Manhattan, back before it was Disneyfied. It was a sordid place, with XXX porn theaters, drug dealers and pimps and prostitutes everywhere. One day I was walking down the street and a pimp said to me, "You have a nice body. Face ain't much, though."
When the pimps insult you, you KNOW you're in trouble!
...I doubt you are ugly and being tall is no crime, I think if you feel ugly, your selfesteem is low and you attract losers and fools.I hope you can do something nice for you! you deserve it!
^^^THIS^^^
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Well, of course. We had a rash of threads this week, though, in which people insisted women could get sex at the drop of a hat, all women have to do is walk out the door.
Well doesn't the CD relationship forum always seem to have these type thread subjects from both Women and Men?
"come one, come all the best entertainment on the internet" lol!
A nice body is more than some women have, though. Aren't you an engineer, or city planner, or something? You don't meet men at professional conferences, on the job at different sites, in meetings, etc? A nice body with a good brain and a great personality should be workable. And don't give up at 53, either. That's too young to throw in the towel.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
who ever said this for you to think it?
. About you being tall, it's 2012 and shorter Men do date and or marry taller Women these days. Also any Woman can have a suitable Man in their life if they want to that is and you cannot convince me you're inferior - sorry but just no way. 
