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I have ADD and it DEFINITELY affects my relationships. Not in a necessarily bad or good way, just in a different way. I also can be pretty compartmentalized in his same way. For example when the girl I'm dating comes over to my place and it gets to be around midnight on a work night (i have to get up at 7) I basically say (though not LITERALLY) "you're either spending the night, or you're leaving." On one hand, I can see how that might come across as rude, on the other, the substance of the message is reasonable.
If you aren't comfortable with being treated this way do something about it! Ask him why (and it had better be a good why)or bounce! A co-worker was dating a guy who acted sketchy like the op's guy for four years. She gets pregnant and he goes nuts! Come to find out he was married and that's why he was so secretive and exact about how much time they spent together. Trust your instincts and don't make excuses for shady behavior. Anyway think about it. You're just starting out and he treats you like this? Don't expect anything better in the future.
This is the same type of woman who will be posting on CD in ten years: I'm married to an in-attentive jerk who ignores me and the kids. Doesn't like to spend quality time and is incapable of good communication. I want a divorce!!! When people show you who they are the first time believe them. He isn't wrong or bad for being the way he is...that's just him. Deal with it or move on.
so i have been seeing my bf for like 5 months now. i really enjoy our time together but i cant help but feel like he is always so quick to end our hangout sessions. firstly, we dont see each other all that much; twice a week 3-4 hours each with one of times when i sleep over. other than that we have very limited contact. ( he doesnt like talking on the phone so i keep them short and rare).
but when i sleep over for example, he is like "when should you leave in the morning?" and when i say 10 am, he just says "oh, time for you to go!" on the dot and then i have no choice but to leave...even if i had the room to stay an extra 15 or so mins just to be in his company.granted 90% of the time i am on a tight schedule and its important that i leave on time, but his constant reminding makes me feel like im not wanted there...is it crazy to want a bf who WANTS to have you stay later, longer? i just dont feel welcome and act super self conscious and paranoid. i just wish we would hang out and just let it be, instead of carefully blocked sessions of time. it feels like an appointment and not a natural thing.
i have tried to let it not bother me but it grates on me. and im really annoyed. do i have the right to be? how should i deal with this?
You may consider him your BF,but you're not his GF. You're just a booty call. A wam bam thank you mam! A hit and run! End the relationship. Don't ask him about his actions because he's only going to lie. Another lesson learned. Good luck.
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i just dont feel welcome and act super self conscious and paranoid. i just wish we would hang out and just let it be, instead of carefully blocked sessions of time. it feels like an appointment and not a natural thing.
