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I asked him if he posted them up on the Internet, and he said no. I guess I believe him.. I don't think he'd be that stupid because if she found out then he could really be in some hot water. He likes to look at those 'submit your ex' sites though, which I've always found distasteful (assuming they really are exgf pics).
Oh...yeh..just a vistor....
1. why would you believe that?
2. why would you date someone who does that?
Dude is creepy and just keeps sounding worse and worse. There is porn and then there is creepy dude porn. He is filed under creepy dude. I bet if you really looked at where the computer was you could find it. But who really cares at this point. Stop wasting your time on that trash.
You should forward them to his ex girlfriend and say " Remember these? (insert his name) has sent them to all his friends. Just thought you would like to know." Then break into his computer , phone and closet where he keeps the CD-Roms and find the ones he took of you and delete them all. If at all possible, smash his harddrive on the computer, with a hammer, and throw the iphone into a large body of water. When he complains, claim innocence and say you do not know what happened to his computer and do not have any idea where his iphone is at or what happened to his DVD-Roms. Do it, even if he finds you with the hammer in your hand. He will do this to you (sent out pics) when you guys break up, so you better act now. It's possible he already sent the pics to his homies. Before getting rid of the iphone, text his friend and pretend that you are him. Tell him that you have a brand new pic of your girlfriend (you), that was taken last night, and would he like to see it. If the friend acts surprised, then you know that he hasn't sent any out yet, but if the friend is all for it and says something to indicate that he doesn't know where to hide so many pics any more, then you know that he's seen them for sure.
It's almost 3am and I cant sleep. I feel so screwed up right now. Today I looked on my bf's phone and saw that he has messaged his friend a handful of pics of his exgf.. raunchy crotch shots. I know I shouldn't have looked on his phone but something inside told me to, and considering what I saw, I don't feel all that guilty for doing it.
He was in a relationship with her for a few years and we have been together about the same. I just don't get it. I don't get why he even still has them and why they're "still in use" after all these years. I don't get why he feels it's morally ok to pass them around to his friends. I don't like the idea that if we break up that he might do the same thing with my pics.
He claims that although he's not proud that he sent his friend those pics, because yes, it was sophomorish, it's just not that big a deal to him. He says he understands that I am upset about it but those pics really don't mean anything to him and he feels justified in sending them around because she cheated on him and he has no respect for her. He says he doesn't give a crap about the pics, that he has no attachment to them - he just wanted to show his friend who had been asking about them for awhile.
Is this what guys do? Show pictures around of their conquests? I just feel so crappy.. I know he doesnt want to be with her so that's not it, I just feel kindof stupid now, like his friends mean more to him somehow, that there are no boundaries when it comes to them. He claims there ARE boundaries, that I'm just making too much out of it. I just feel like I see him differently now. My sister says I had a peek into the workings of the male mind and it was a bit of a dose of reality for me - she says not all men are like this, that a more mature, less carefree man wouldn't do something like this. I feel like sh*t.
I don't approve of snooping, but be glad you found out now.
A person who sends pictures around to his buds, ex-gf or not, is a bit of a scumbag. Not even a bit of one. A real one. Because he basically took an intimate photo of his girlfriend when she was at her most vulnerable and broadcast it to the world. Even though only one other guy got the photos, what to stop the recipient from passing it along to others?
This cuts to the heart of everything. A woman's sense of privacy. Her relationship with her family. Her job. You name it. A colleague's ex-boyfriend did the same thing to her, sending it to everybody he could think of for revenge. She lost her job and had to leave town. It was that bad.
What's more, if he did it to her, he'll do it to you. I would insist on looking at every single photo on that phone and deleted any of yours posthaste.
First off, I know I was wrong for looking through his phone. I can admit that, but what's done is done. I can't change it now but can only make better decisions in the future. For what it's worth, he continues to say that I can look on whatever I want, be that his phone or his computer... whatever I want. He is never protective over his phones' whereabouts with me, and I know the password because he volunteered it. I admitted yesterday to him that I shouldn't even have picked up his phone, that I wish I wouldn't have looked at it. Still, I know I shouldn't have looked done it... I admit that.
For those who think that it's trashy and not respectable to send raunchy pictures to each other while in a relationship, I don't really agree with that. Aside from the potential to be burned with those very pictures in the event of a break up, hey does anything wrong with couples sharing something intimate like that if it's intended to be for their eyes only. What's so wrong with that?
As for my pictures that he already has, yeah there are plenty of them, and I would have my work cut out for me if I was going to try to find them all to delete them. Even if I were to delete them all from his computer and his iPhone, he likely has them in a previous backup of his phone and can just restore from an old backup and get them all back. So I think I'm kind of screwed as far as that goes.. at least my face is not in most of them. All I can say is that I would've never thought at the time of sending these that I would have anything to worry about with him. If that were the case I never would've sent any at all, in fact I'll go further by saying I wouldn't be with somebody who I thought had the potential for essentially publicizing them in the event of us breaking up. In any event, I can't change that either. He has them and I don't think there's any way that I could delete all of them. I have pictures of him too so it's not like it was one-sided.
Well, first, good for you listening to your instincts to look at the phone. I'd go ahead and go thru and delete everything, get his computer and look thru there and delete as well, then I'd delete him.
Goodluck and in the future save those kind of pictures for your husband.
For those who think that it's trashy and not respectable to send raunchy pictures to each other while in a relationship, I don't really agree with that. Aside from the potential to be burned with those very pictures in the event of a break up, hey does anything wrong with couples sharing something intimate like that if it's intended to be for their eyes only. What's so wrong with that?
Um, you just made my argument for me. I don't have a moral issue with the pics. It's the fact that THOSE PICS WILL LIVE FOREVER, and you have NO control over them. Ever. That is stupid. And just because your face isn't in them doesn't mean you can't be associated with them. If he sends them to his friends, he tells them they're you (or they just know because they know you've been with him). And then they send them to someone else and say, "Hey, Jack sent me this picture of Jill Doe." And there you go -- you're "around."
wrong-a woman with any self respect would never willingly pose for skanky pics in the first place and apparently there is a big problem with couples sending erotic pictures to each other- or we wouldn't be here responding to it.
GROSS AND DISGUSTING- You do what you do -you get what you get.
That's a load of crap. There's nothing wrong with couples sending each other pictures. I'd never date someone who was so sexually repressed that they felt such was "disgusting" or "disrespectful". Fortunately most people don't agree with your antiquated and repressed line of thinking.
I've kept all photos of my ex's that are Rated R or above, but I keep them locked away. I've never shown them to anyone, and never will.
Just out of curiosity... why do you keep them?
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