Leaving my husband, at last. (successful, success, public, wife)
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I'll return to this thread again, but YOU need to read my words below 1000 times over & over if you have to. I DO NOT CARE IF HE:
- begs & cries on his knees for hours until they are raw & bloody to your parents that he has changed & will be different or may lighning strike him dead
- is 1000 times nicer to his & your daughter & son & buys them thousands of pounds worth of things
- tells you he will commit suicide if you do not go back to him
- tells you he will be lonely & sad for the rest of his life
- and all the other millions of lies he has to tell you
I repeat, if he says or does any of the above or more, DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT feel the slightest bit sorry for him and go back to him. If he kills himself, that's his loss & not your fault. He should have been a much better husband 20+ years ago. I have absolute zero sympathy or pity for this man. He's a broke loser who doesn't care if you're miserable along with him until you die.
You needed to have moved on 20+ years ago. You would have been a whole LOT happier. He's not a man. No man would treat the woman he supposedly loves this way. He's not worth the dirt on my shoes!
I'll return to this thread again, but YOU need to read my words below 1000 times over & over if you have to. I DO NOT CARE IF HE:
- begs & cries on his knees for hours until they are raw & bloody to your parents that he has changed & will be different or may lighning strike him dead
- is 1000 times nicer to his & your daughter & son & buys them thousands of pounds worth of things
- tells you he will commit suicide if you do not go back to him
- tells you he will be lonely & sad for the rest of his life
- and all the other millions of lies he has to tell you
I repeat, if he says or does any of the above or more, DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT feel the slightest bit sorry for him and go back to him. If he kills himself, that's his loss & not your fault. He should have been a much better husband 20+ years ago. I have absolute zero sympathy or pity for this man. He's a broke loser who doesn't care if you're miserable along with him until you die.
You needed to have moved on 20+ years ago. You would have been a whole LOT happier. He's not a man. No man would treat the woman he supposedly loves this way. He's not worth the dirt on my shoes!
Ladies, please be upfront with your next guy, show him this message so he could run away in time. Healthy males would run, and what'd be left - you deserve every bit of that. Women who love to claim abuse tend to lose 100lbs (after the split) and make themselves look pretty otherwise for the more promising guy who never ever is shown attitude like that in the post above before it's too late.
It doesn't take much these days to be labeled "manipulative and controlling", unless you are a woman, then your are a victim of manipulation and control by default. I don't know the details of your story, but "Manipulative and controlling" is so beaten up and overused, it can mean practically anything a woman doesn't like. "Manipulative and controlling"="I don't want you anymore". Why rationalize, leave and live it up to your new ideals.
It should be understood by default. If a person lacks ability to cooperate, manipulate or exploit, he/she is crippled in some major ways. If you don't want to be manipulated/manipulate, stay single in a cave somewhere.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RememberMee
Ladies, please be upfront with your next guy, show him this message so he could run away in time. Healthy males would run, and what'd be left - you deserve every bit of that. Women who love to claim abuse tend to lose 100lbs (after the split) and make themselves look pretty otherwise for the more promising guy who never ever is shown attitude like that in the post above before it's too late.
Dude - what is your problem? You obviously haven't even read the thread. Now, I don't think she'll ever leave him - but I think she should. I think she should have a long time ago. I think EVERYONE on this thread - women AND men think she should leave him. Why don't you read something before you start spouting off nonsense.
Dude - what is your problem? You obviously haven't even read the thread. Now, I don't think she'll ever leave him - but I think she should. I think she should have a long time ago. I think EVERYONE on this thread - women AND men think she should leave him. Why don't you read something before you start spouting off nonsense.
You have a propensity not to be specific. It could be nonsense because I'm wrong, it could be nonsense because you lack ability to understand. Be specific. I didn't advise her anything, I just pointed to the fact that a) what's considered "control and manipulation" today wouldn't be even noticed 50 years ago b) there are no relationships without manipulation.
You have a propensity not to be specific. It could be nonsense because I'm wrong, it could be nonsense because you lack ability to understand. Be specific. I didn't advise her anything, I just pointed to the fact that a) what's considered "control and manipulation" today wouldn't be even noticed 50 years ago b) there are no relationships without manipulation.
It's nonsense because you are wrong. It's obvious you didn't read the thread. Did you just have a bad day or something? It happens to all of us - but there's no need to take it out on every thread and every woman.
It's a nice start. It begs for It's nonsense because you are wrong because...insert your text here. See, it's so simple.
I've read enough of general messages in this thread, just like the one I replied to. It's not like my general remarks stand out in the sea of specificity and details.
Only name calling? Being told to F...off, called a F....ing *****....being pushed about, emotional abuse (my dad had a heart attack and was in hospital last year, he didn't come with me to visit, in fact...he ignored me for 3 days), venting at my daughter...telling her she is wrong at everything....telling her that if her parents split up she better run. Being told to shut up constantly, mind games...nice one minute...next nasty.....in the past...hair pulled, stones thrown, slapped, kicked.
Its been tough. Not normal rough and tumble fighting between spouses...NO...this is not love and if it is, you know what? I don't want it.
I stayed too long. Stayed because I didn't want my husband to have part custody, not feed them, and me being away from my children would have been tough. Either way was tough, but now, I CAN go. So I will. Tonight, hubby giving me the sad eye routine. I haven't told him that I am going, he still thinks we are buying a house together...hahaha....bloody hahaha....
When he finds out **** will hit the fan.
But for now, I have the sad eyes, quiet routine. I know his game. He says he has changed, but I just don't believe it. I think he has a screw loose.
I want my life back.
Quote:
Originally Posted by RememberMee
It's a nice start. It begs for It's nonsense because you are wrong because...insert your text here. See, it's so simple.
I've read enough of general messages in this thread, just like the one I replied to. It's not like my general remarks stand out in the sea of specificity and details.
You're right. I haven't been specific enough. I assumed you could read. That was my bad.
Ladies, please be upfront with your next guy, show him this message so he could run away in time. Healthy males would run, and what'd be left - you deserve every bit of that. Women who love to claim abuse tend to lose 100lbs (after the split) and make themselves look pretty otherwise for the more promising guy who never ever is shown attitude like that in the post above before it's too late.
This post is about leaving an abusive relationship and an abusive male. It's not for or about healthy males. It's pretty clear you didn't read this thread or you would not think this was bad advice.
This post is about leaving an abusive relationship and an abusive male. It's not for or about healthy males. It's pretty clear you didn't read this thread or you would not think this was bad advice.
You're right. I haven't been specific enough. I assumed you could read. That was my bad.
See - condescension works both ways!
I read that post, it doesn't sound as something extraordinary, general indifference is widespread in the developed societies. My former wife refused to visit her dying grandfather, refused to attend his funerals (because she doesn't want to be reminded about death and dying, that was her excuse), even though me, a stranger, insisted on both accounts. Guess what, she thought of my insistence as "emotional abuse" too. The rest items on the list, don't strike my eyes as something that most people don't go through. Yes, girl, abuse free paradise is just around the corner.
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