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What I am trying to say is... it sounds like none of those Asian women that found you attractive and liked your company actually had a crush on you. Were any of them that upset and in tears because they were in love with you but mummy and daddy wouldn't allow them to date you?
It's one thing to find a man attractive, we all enjoy a little eye candy and even some casual flirtation with a charming good looking man. But unless he really tugs at our heartstrings and fits what we want in a boyfriend, if we sense that the man likes us a lot more than we like him, then it's a no go on dating him. It's just not worth the hassle after a date or two to break things off with him.
As I've stated before, and have told women before, I don't have a racial slant. I like the look of ethnic over white or black, but that's just aesthetic and means nothing. If I had my choice, I would prefer:
a Black girl,
who acts like a white girl,
with the manners of a Filipino girl,
the cooking skills of a Hispanic girl,
the body of a Brazilian girl,
the accent of a Puerto Rican girl, and
the sex drive of an Australian girl.
Of course, that's never going to happen. So I resolved to just be open to women that are in shape and my age or younger, preferably younger.
Now, to your comment: if I meet an Asian girl, unlike most men my first instinct is not to hit on them. I'm cordial to every female I come across until they cross me. The ones who remain courteous and respectful will get my attention, and again, I don't necessarily need a committed relationship. It just really irritates me that there is an initial judgment based solely on race, regardless of who's doing it to whom and why.
I busted my tail working full time since I was 18 to get to a point where I can walk down the street and not have white mothers grab their children closer to them, or to be asked if I want to do layaway at Target, have my checks questioned at Best Buy, or have someone scream "he's got a gun!!!" when going for my wallet at the bank. I'm being facetious (Except the layaway one, that really did happen), but my point is, it's really aggravating that I can educate the world that skin tone is irrelevant yet there are still older folks who can't break from the mold, or let the media brainwash them one way or another.
The absolute irony: I could be wearing a $500 suit from Men's Wearhouse and it still wouldn't matter. I could have an MBA from Harvard and it wouldn't matter. All the majority of them see, is skin. And that's sad. I shouldn't have to argue for acceptance. Accept people because they're people, be open until and unless they screw up.
I busted my tail working full time since I was 18 to get to a point where I can walk down the street and not have white mothers grab their children closer to them, or to be asked if I want to do layaway at Target, have my checks questioned at Best Buy, or have someone scream "he's got a gun!!!" when going for my wallet at the bank. I'm being facetious (Except the layaway one, that really did happen), but my point is, it's really aggravating that I can educate the world that skin tone is irrelevant yet there are still older folks who can't break from the mold, or let the media brainwash them one way or another.
I think things are getting better regarding racism. I understand it's still there and there are still cases of real racism. That being said. I think things are definitely improving.
Look right now, we have a black man running for president. He just might make it too. Politics aside, I feel pretty good about it. Just 40 50 years ago blacks had it much tougher. If you could go back in time to the early 60's I think people wouldn't believe that a black man is getting this close to winning the white house.
I think the only color people care about now is green. If a company can hire talented and capable individuals that add to the bottom line then they are going to do it. Racism just doesn't make sense from a financial point of view. By not hiring minorities, in some cases you just cut about 30 to 50 percent of possibly qualified people for a position to fill.
Now, to your comment: if I meet an Asian girl, unlike most men my first instinct is not to hit on them. I'm cordial to every female I come across until they cross me. The ones who remain courteous and respectful will get my attention, and again, I don't necessarily need a committed relationship. It just really irritates me that there is an initial judgment based solely on race, regardless of who's doing it to whom and why.
Well from the Asian women I know, and maybe it's a cultural thing, but when we are single, we aren't in a rush to date just anyone or jump into a relationship. It just doesn't bother us to be single and without a man. On the other hand, it seems like any single white women that I've known were more hyper about wanting to be asked out.
Then consider that most Asian parents are first gen immigrants or the type that hang out at the Chinatowns and only socialize with other Asians of the same nationality. Those are the ones that are suspicious of all other races, even white people. But older Asians that speak English well and are college educated, and have assimilated well into western American culture, they are the ones that will be more accepting of their daughters dating outside their race.
Or course, not being a fly on the wall when you've asked out an Asian girl and then been turned down, I can't say for sure why things didn't work out better for you. But blaming their parents' racial prejudices as the reason seems like a variation of the other reasons that women use to politely turn down a guy that they don't feel a spark for, that they are too busy to date or start a relationship now.
Well from the Asian women I know, and maybe it's a cultural thing, but when we are single, we aren't in a rush to date just anyone or jump into a relationship. It just doesn't bother us to be single and without a man. On the other hand, it seems like any single white women that I've known were more hyper about wanting to be asked out.
Then consider that most Asian parents are first gen immigrants or the type that hang out at the Chinatowns and only socialize with other Asians of the same nationality. Those are the ones that are suspicious of all other races, even white people. But older Asians that speak English well and are college educated, and have assimilated well into western American culture, they are the ones that will be more accepting of their daughters dating outside their race.
Or course, not being a fly on the wall when you've asked out an Asian girl and then been turned down, I can't say for sure why things didn't work out better for you. But blaming their parents' racial prejudices as the reason seems like a variation of the other reasons that women use to politely turn down a guy that they don't feel a spark for, that they are too busy to date or start a relationship now.
As I said...twice now, I believe...I don't get turned down by the women I encounter. I get explicitly told that they cannot date me because their parents would kill them for dating a black man. There's no "rejection" to it, no "I don't want to date" to it - otherwise they wouldn't waste their time with me in the first place. In fact, young Asian Americans seem to find me attractive more commonly than black women, likely because of my conversational skills; they approach me more often than I approach them. I've encountered Korean, Chinese, Vietnamese, Japanese...and I will say, Vietnamese is the most restrictive of them all while Japanese seems to be the least restrictive.
You can justify it or pass the buck off as much as you like, but the fact is, most Asian parents in my experience and in southwest US are extremely biased against African American men, quite judgmental.
In my experience, black girls are known for three things:
Love of material things;
Love of men with massive muscles ala 50 Cent; and
Neck bobbing head swaying knife swinging attitudes when upset.
In my experience, white girls are known for four things:
Intermittent love of material things;
Love of men with muscles but not necessarily massive muscles;
Increased emotions when upset, most notably crying; and
a fun, bubbly, almost carefree lifestyle more often than not.
Now, I like the look of some black females, and I would love nothing more than to date a black female. However, physical beauty is meaningless if the attitude is out of order. I get along significantly better with every other race, period. That's because I don't smoke weed, I'm not a thug, I'm not "street smart", and I've never been to prison.
So...while I enjoy black women's physical beauty for the most part, the attitudes don't work for me. I much prefer the general "white girl" attitude...doesn't talk slang, no southern and/or ghetto drawl, polite, sweet, nice, considerate, respectful, bubbly, flirty, etc. Additionally, I find white girls to be significantly more forgiving in the sexual experience arena. Seems the sisters assume that every black male humps everything that moves, and if a guy happens along that was not sexually active as a teenager, there must be something wrong with him. Whereas on the white hand side, it's actually sought after and applauded. That's a boon for me.
Last and quite possibly most important is willingness to work. In my experience, black girls just don't think they should have to work, and if they do work, they blow their money at the club or whatever. I've yet to meet a black female my age who is at my level and got there without the help of a guy, and who is not a single parent. I meet white girls every day who are near my age, single, hard working - some making more money than me - own their own place, take care of business, no children, well spoken, etc.
As I said...twice now, I believe...I don't get turned down by the women I encounter. I get explicitly told that they cannot date me because their parents would kill them for dating a black man. There's no "rejection" to it, no "I don't want to date" to it - otherwise they wouldn't waste their time with me in the first place. In fact, young Asian Americans seem to find me attractive more commonly than black women, likely because of my conversational skills; they approach me more often than I approach them. I've encountered Korean, Chinese, Vietnamese, Japanese...and I will say, Vietnamese is the most restrictive of them all while Japanese seems to be the least restrictive.
You can justify it or pass the buck off as much as you like, but the fact is, most Asian parents in my experience and in southwest US are extremely biased against African American men, quite judgmental.
There is a big pool of women for black men (including yourself). Many have found interracial relationships. Why are you limiting yourself to only Asian women? You're selling yourself short by doing that. "If the Jews do not accept me, I will go to the Gentiles."
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