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What if the mother and the guy agree that they are not suited to be in a romantic relationship, however, they have a solid co-parenting relationship and the guy is a responsible father to the kid? You don't have to be romantically involved to have a good parenting relationship.
True, it's possible to be a good father without being in a relationship with the children's mother. However, with all other things being equal, I'd just prefer a guy who doesn't already have children.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LegalDiva
Trust me, most women with a good head on their shoulders thinks/feels the same way - unless the man falls under some strange exception (like his girlfriend died before they got married). No need to defend your actions to the men who are bashing you on this thread. Men who don't fit the criteria you want are going to keep attacking you no matter what, just like women rag on when a man go for the hot women at a bar over the not so hot women. If they consider that "snobbish" thats their problem, not yours.
I dont get why the OP is still getting flack for her posts, and not sure what you hope to accomplish by asking all these questions. Seriously, she doesnt want to date guys who have kids. Simple as that!! There are too many "if's" in your scenario! Who cares? If shes not itnerested, shes not interested! If you are a guy who has a kid, its best to just move on!!!! ENOUGH!! Why is this thread almost 60 pages!?!?!!
I agree with you. I have no idea why this thread continues. But, I don't think your 2 cents (or targeting me) will help to stop it. Also, I'm not giving you (or her) any flack. I simply threw a couple of scenarios at her, and wondered how she felt. But, thanks for your input.
I guess one thing we all can agree on is that there are a lot of losers online. Some sites are better than others though. Not sure how reasonable it is to complain about people you meet on a FREE dating website. I mean, it's a FREE website for heaven's sake
OP, since you would like to meet "quality" men, have you considered paying for a matchmaker, or go to the dating sites that requires you to PAY? Sometimes you need to invest to get the results you want.
I guess one thing we all can agree on is that there are a lot of losers online. Some sites are better than others though. Not sure how reasonable it is to complain about people you meet on a FREE dating website. I mean, it's a FREE website for heaven's sake
OP, since you would like to meet "quality" men, have you considered paying for a matchmaker, or go to the dating sites that requires you to PAY? Sometimes you need to invest to get the results you want.
I do PAY for other dating sites and I have met good guys on FREE sites. Therefore, I will continue to use both.
I'm going to give you my honest yet undoubtedly "snobbish" and "elitist" opinion about this:
I understand that many unmarried people have sex, and anytime that people have sex, there is a risk of pregnancy. However, there is a certain segment of men who have kids out of wedlock much more frequently than any other segment. I believe that carelessness on the part of both the women and the men is the reason why these pregnancies happen...not broken condoms.
I think good, respectable, family-oriented men who accidentally father children out of wedlock DO marry the woman or they at least stay with her and raise their children. They don't jump on POF to look for other women when they could be focusing on caring for their children and strengthening their relationship with the children's mother.
I wanted to know how you felt about these type of men, and now that I see your point, I assume you wouldn't date these guys, either. As I've previously stated, I don't care how you choose a man... that's your prerogative. But, I still don't understand when someone can't find what they're looking for - to me it's just never been a problem. You seem to be intelligent, so I'm sure you'll find your Mr. Right. My only hope is that it doesn't take you too long, because no one should go through life all alone. I hope you're not offended by any of this, and I wish you luck in your search.
You seem to be intelligent, so I'm sure you'll find your Mr. Right. My only hope is that it doesn't take you too long, because no one should go through life all alone. I hope you're not offended by any of this, and I wish you luck in your search.
Sometimes, in life, we can't always get what me want. But, we can usually get what we need. The problem with some people is that they want a finished product, instead of something they have to work for. Maybe they don't know how to make something out of nothing. Or, maybe they're just too lazy to do the work. Whatever the case may be, even a diamond has its flaws. You just have to take that diamond in the ruff, polish it, and turn it into a gem. Every rose has its thorns. But, they also have plenty of value. It's really how we choose to look at it. That's why when life gives me lemons... I make lemonade.
Sometimes, in life, we can't always get what me want. But, we can usually get what we need. The problem with some people is that they want a finished product, instead of something they have to work for. Maybe they don't know how to make something out of nothing. Or, maybe they're just too lazy to do the work. Whatever the case may be, even a diamond has its flaws. You just have to take that diamond in the ruff, polish it, and turn it into a gem. Every rose has its thorns. But, they also have plenty of value. It's really how we choose to look at it. That's why when life gives me lemons... I make lemonade.
I mostly agree. People need to do their own self-polishing and improvement first. I know that we all "train" our partners to some degree, but we all have to make ourselves into the kinds of people we are asking others to be for us.
So if I have worked my tail off, trained hard, made sacrifices, etc., I would want a partner who embodies those same principles of concern and value. So in these respects, I am with the OP.
I mostly agree. People need to do their own self-polishing and improvement first. I know that we all "train" our partners to some degree, but we all have to make ourselves into the kinds of people we are asking others to be for us.
So if I have worked my tail off, trained hard, made sacrifices, etc., I would want a partner who embodies those same principles of concern and value. So in these respects, I am with the OP.
I mostly agree. People need to do their own self-polishing and improvement first. I know that we all "train" our partners to some degree, but we all have to make ourselves into the kinds of people we are asking others to be for us.
So if I have worked my tail off, trained hard, made sacrifices, etc., I would want a partner who embodies those same principles of concern and value. So in these respects, I am with the OP.
Agree. If I bust my heinikus to get down to a cute little dress size and do my best not to leave the house looking anything less than stunning,
I at least expect my guy to be weight proportionate to height, I'd like to see him doing some basic form of exercise, making some consistent healthy food choices and getting good medical care.
At this season in life, maintenance counts for a lot.
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