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I am nicer to people who smile at me. And a smile makes anyone instantly more attractive. I don't typically notice much about someone's looks. I am more likely to notice a poorly fitting outfit. I know it sounds strange, but it always happens to me, I'll be talking to someone (let's say male) and after I finish the conversation, a friend will come up and say "he was really good looking." I have to think about it and go, "oh yeah, I guess so."
Personally I find I get better treatment at places than most people I know. I am average looking, or maybe a little better than average, but no stunner.
I typically get better service at most places than the average person. I think there is really only one reason. I smile a lot more than the average person. I'll be honest, it works out really well. When you need to use an expired coupon. If you want to get a discount. Or if people want to give you some sort of free stuff. I find it works equally well with men and women. At the very minimum, I get a smile back and brighten someone else's mood.
I want to feel feminine in their arms. I've never had a serious boyfriend though.
Beilua Rose;
I don't know who or what circumstance made you feel so harshly judgmental of yourself, but I hope somehow you find the way to overcome it because life is too short and I believe you are letting these feelings stand between you and your own happiness.
I am not a pretty woman. I recall once as a young girl asking my mother if I was pretty. She gave me a searching look and said: "No, you are not. I think the term would be handsome." I was crestfallen. Adopted, short, and chubby -- I needed reassurance from my tall, slender mother. Handsome (in the early 60s) was Rock Hudson or Tony Curtis. I wanted to be pretty like Sandra Dee, or beautiful like Liz Taylor. So, if I couldn't be pretty, I decided I would be smart and commanding.
The message is: YOU decide what you are, and how you will be responded to by others. If you want to be feminine, then be feminine -- don't look for someone else that will make you feel feminine. Only YOU can do that for yourself.
And no matter how old you are, it is never too late to be who you want to be. Decide what feminine means to you, and be that. If it is colors, or ruffles and lace, or talking in a soft voice -- just do it.
And remember, it doesn't matter what others think about you, as long as you think well of yourself.
Yes, I know beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but in reality it seems like a lot of people are shallow when it comes to physical appearances.
I would be considered physically unattractive. No matter how I dress, how I do my hair or how I wear my makeup, some people seem to always confuse me for a man.
Men usually don't take the time to check me out, and when I'm being serviced on I feel like people are more likely to become impatient with me because I am unattractive. Likewise, beautiful people get more positive attention. They get more stares of admiration, the customer service that they receive is not forced and they have plenty of mates to choose from waiting in line for them.
Who knows. Maybe I treat attractive people better too. Actually, No. I treat funnier people or those who look depressed better.
Maybe I am shallow when It comes to dating though. I like tall men who are bigger than me with huge hands and feet, but the only reason I like those types of men is because I want to feel feminine in their arms.
I've never had a serious boyfriend though.
Sounds to me like you need to boost your self esteem up a little. People can pick up on what kind of an attitude you are generating and I truly think that it plays a part in how you appear to them. If you feel like you look like a guy no matter what you do to yourself with regard to hair, makeup and clothes then that's exactly what you will appear like. Perhaps its time to revamp your "style"? I am 64 and have always been considered attractive but have not received any special treatment that I can think of. As a matter of fact, I have 4 sisters who never seem to call me or come near me and one refers to me as the "fat rich bi**ch on the hill". Nice, huh? Yes I could stand to lose some weight, but rich?? not in this lifetime. I am married to a guy 10 years younger than me, have a great life and a great home..who knows what it could be. Don't spend the rest of your life worrying about how people perceive you, its time wasted. As far as being shallow....you just might be...the guy you fall in love with may be nothing like what you prefer and won't that be a shock?? It happened to me and I am beyond happy.
Seeing as how I hang around nerds, I can safely say that some of my friends are "unattractive" to me physically. I treat them no different than my friends who are downright smoking hot.
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