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I think one reason why we see so many people asking some of these relationship questions is because they just may not have had anyone guide them on how to deal within a relationship. Today most people just wing it but what's really crazy is how many men have become weak and sensitive while the world doesn't allow men to be weak and sensitive.. As for women I think it's kind of the same question as who is teaching women to be women? Today grandma or grandpa could be 30 or 35 so how much life wisdom is gained there?
If your bitter just get over it. What's your alternative?
Like its been said trying to find someone to cure your "bitterness" is not going to work. YOU and only you have control over YOUR happiness...no one else and if you give a person that much control/power and they disappoint you, then so be it because that person should have never been put in the position to be responsible for your happiness in the first place.
There are a lot of emotional children who are trying to have adult relationships when they have not become emotional adults yet. You didn't get enough love from your mom so you're looking for a woman to make you feel good about yourself or the woman who never got any attention from her dad or he wasn't in her life and now she's looking for a father to treat her like daddy's little girl. People who are carrying emotional childhood pain need to deal with that before trying to develop relationships because you will never have a healthy one until you do.
Seek therapy so you can get to the root of the problem and learn how to correct your destructive behavior. A emotionally healthy person will not stay in a relationship with a emotionally damaged person because they will recognize they are getting the short end of the stick and leave instead of continuing to take the abuse.
No one is going to come and take your bitterness away because there is no perfect person period. Eventually that perfect person will prove to be not so perfect, then what? You will go back to being bitter again because that person has disappointed you like all the others. Its a vicious cycle and will only stop when YOU decide to step off the wheel.
I'm in one of those moods again.....where I feel hateful & bitter towards the opposite sex. The sum total of the past negative experiences that I've had & the way girls have treated me just bubbling up deep within & affecting my thoughts. 'tis sad.
Do you ever feel bitter? How can you tell that you are feeling bitter about the past? What do you do to fix it, if anything? Or does it fix itself of its own accord?
I can't help but feel, however, that if I ever meet "the one", I will never again think of these feelings, let alone have them again. I'll just be.....happy.
What an angry, sad post and hopefully and older one. One sure clue that you are a bitter person is to re read this post!! Of course in my lifetime I have felt bitter but if you get as old as me, 64 and let the bad things that have happened to you make you bitter, you become old before your time and end alone because you no longer trust people in general. In my lifetime so far, I have been married 3 times, have had open heart surgery, lost both parents and a nephew too soon, and more..I am an old CHICK..afterall. My first husband was an alcoholic, loved his marijuana and chased women. He wouldn't work and support his son or me. He ran off with a married woman who left HER son to be with this GEM so I hightailed it back to my home state of CT and left him and his wench in the dust. Was I bitter..YUP you betcha...but it didn't stop me from getting a great job and meeting some fine folks back here in CT where it was sane.
I remained bitter for a long, long time but continued on my search for that perfect husband and found him..he was my soulmate for sure. After a year of marriage, he had a fatal heart attack at home and I was angry at everyone God included. How could he do this to me again and so painful at that. I stayed alone and angry for six years. It took me that long to pull out of my anger and bitterness.
After having sworn off companionship and men in general, I met my present husband while working at a small company in the purchasing department. I had to go ask him a question about a product I was purchasing for our company and he about blew my shorts of telling me he was busy. I said to him "Now, who peed in your Cheerios" and walked off. Ten minutes later, he was at my desk apologizing and asking me out for lunch. We have been together for 15 years and I adore him. He was just in here telling me how it was his life's ambition to keep me happy and you know something, he meant it.
Don't ever, not ever let bitterness eat you up. For someone like you who is probably pretty young and still looking for that perfect someone it will show on your face and come through to your heart. Bitterness will leave you in the dust because it doesn't allow you to open yourself up to all possibilities. Good luck and like I said, I hope this is an old post and you have found someone for just you!
I'm in one of those moods again.....where I feel hateful & bitter towards the opposite sex. The sum total of the past negative experiences that I've had & the way girls have treated me just bubbling up deep within & affecting my thoughts. 'tis sad.
Do you ever feel bitter? How can you tell that you are feeling bitter about the past? What do you do to fix it, if anything? Or does it fix itself of its own accord?
I can't help but feel, however, that if I ever meet "the one", I will never again think of these feelings, let alone have them again. I'll just be.....happy.
After a bad or unexpected breakup, some bitterness is normal, I think. When it is allowed to grow, unchecked..that's when your problems start. Many people who feel this level of bitterness never stop to take a look at their part that helped contributed to the breakup. Their part may be something as simple as their tendency to keep choosing a type of person to get involved with who is not good for them.
It might be a good idea to get a journal or composition book and write about the relationship, analyze it. Also, write about the two relationships that preceded the one that just ended, too. You may be able to disern a pattern That may reveal something that would help you overcome the bitterness. A short stint at a support group or invidual relationship therapy might help. Be careful of support groups that keep you stuck in how much you resent your partner with no ideas for you on how to move on with your life.
You know you're mired in bitterness when you believe yourself to be 100% the victim of the ex-partner's selfishness or some other type of disrespect or cruelty. Bitterness doesn't go away on it's on. And if you want the best chance possible of ever finding your one and only, please remember prospective women would consider bitterness right up there with bad breath and b.o. They will make an extra effort to avoid a guy with any of these three. Good luck, work to overcome the bitterness, don't get stuck in it, and there could be someone for you out there. Learn from your ex's mistakes and your own.
I'm in one of those moods again.....where I feel hateful & bitter towards the opposite sex. The sum total of the past negative experiences that I've had & the way girls have treated me just bubbling up deep within & affecting my thoughts. 'tis sad.
Do you ever feel bitter? How can you tell that you are feeling bitter about the past? What do you do to fix it, if anything? Or does it fix itself of its own accord?
I can't help but feel, however, that if I ever meet "the one", I will never again think of these feelings, let alone have them again. I'll just be.....happy.
After a bad or unexpected breakup, some bitterness is normal, I think. When it is allowed to grow, unchecked..that's when your problems start. Many people who feel this level of bitterness never stop to take a look at their part that helped contributed to the breakup. Their part may be something as simple as their tendency to keep choosing a type of person to get involved with who is not good for them.
It might be a good idea to get a journal or composition book and write about the relationship, analyze it. Also, write about the two relationships that preceded the one that just ended, too. You may be able to disern a pattern That may reveal something that would help you overcome the bitterness. A short stint at a support group or invidual relationship therapy might help. Be careful of support groups that keep you stuck in how much you resent your partner with no ideas for you on how to move on with your life.
You know you're mired in bitterness when you believe yourself to be 100% the victim of the ex-partner's selfishness or some other type of disrespect or cruelty. Bitterness doesn't go away on it's own. And if you want the best chance possible of ever finding your one and only, please remember prospective women would consider bitterness right up there with bad breath and b.o. They will make an extra effort to avoid a guy with any of these three. Good luck, work to overcome the bitterness, don't get stuck in it, and there could be someone for you out there. Learn from your ex's mistakes and your own.
I'm in one of those moods again.....where I feel hateful & bitter towards the opposite sex. The sum total of the past negative experiences that I've had & the way girls have treated me just bubbling up deep within & affecting my thoughts. 'tis sad.
Do you ever feel bitter? How can you tell that you are feeling bitter about the past? What do you do to fix it, if anything? Or does it fix itself of its own accord?
I can't help but feel, however, that if I ever meet "the one", I will never again think of these feelings, let alone have them again. I'll just be.....happy.
You will never be happy even if you meet the most wonderful woman on the planet, because the problem isn't women, it's you. No-one can make you complete, no-one can make your life the best it can be...that can only be done by one person...you.
Bitterness is the last bastion of those who blame everyone else for their problems in life.
A one sided opinion. Women now days want money. Has nothing to do with being happy with myself, or finding some one to be complete. Women now are not interested in relationships, just want you can bring to the table. They will even sacrifice the things they want, if you have money. Sad but true. The last one, I got tired of her money talk and turned around and took her home. Thank god she doesnt know where I live. MONEY.
ROTFL! And that's not a one-sided (and outrageously inaccurate) opinion/generalization? You're just as bitter as the OP and have obviously chosen very poorly if your experience is that all women "only want money." I am a female and have countless female friends. None of them give one damn about money. I earn my own money, as do all of my friends. You obviously have a penchant for golddiggers and then curiously complain about the very women you choose to hang with.
In any case, people who are bitter are women (or men) need to do some self-examination. If all of your relationships repeatedly fail, the women aren't ALL to blame, the fault lies with you.
I was just checking it out, I'm new to C-D, but I'm getting kinda bummed by so much negativity on this particular forum (with occasional upbeat and thoughtful posts, like yours). But I've started to move on to Politics.
That's basically going from the frying pan into the fire.
This is gonna sound gross, but masterbate. Alot. I know, I know, but being a guy our brains get all warped when we have pent up sexual energy. I know that once I've...er....disposed of my sexual cravings it's far easier to see the forest for the trees so to speak.
Women are people. They're not to be revlied. They're not to be idolized. What has brought me happyness is the realization that relationships are an accessory to our lives. Importaint ones, yes, but on an existential level only we truly experience ourselves and our consciousness. Only we truly feel our pain, our joy, our thoughts and ultamitley we are the ones who die, not those around us.
All Alone is All we are- Kurt Cobain.
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