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oh, I know, that's why I wrote "lol" at the end of my reply.
as I get older, I am starting to wonder if some of us just aren't meant to have a long term meaningful relationship. My brother has always had wonderful luck with girls. me? I can't get a guy to stay interested in me for more than a month. my best friends can't figure out why I remain perpetually single as they seem to see some good qualities in me. i guess it's either i'm too fat, too quiet, too stubborn ... or it is just not meant for me.
Ah sorry -- I didn't catch that. It's hard to say what might be getting in your way without knowing you personally. One thing I'll say about myself is that the older I get, the more independent and particular I become -- and I have noticed this trait in some of my other older friends who are single.
After some self-reflection, I realize I may be too selfish to ever be happy in a romantic long-term relationship. So I think it may be best for me not to have a long-term SO. Hopefully I can have a few flings or some FWB situations. So let's have it, do you think someone can have a happy life without a long-term romantic relationship?
Happy? I doubt it. But people adapt and kill their own desires and turn into emotional zombies. And they feel like they don't need some essential things. (like relationships and true connections). So you can fool yourself into thinking that you're ok. But you could never be truly happy. There will always be emptiness somewhere deep down if you take a moment to reflect on it.
And why do you think you're too selfish? That probably just means you did not meet a compatible match. Sometimes people appear as bad people if they are near someone who makes them look bad in comparison. But usually, it's because they are mismatched. You just need to find a good match and fall in love and then you won't see yourself as "too selfish".
After some self-reflection, I realize I may be too selfish to ever be happy in a romantic long-term relationship. So I think it may be best for me not to have a long-term SO. Hopefully I can have a few flings or some FWB situations. So let's have it, do you think someone can have a happy life without a long-term romantic relationship?
No. Because it's not a happy life until you have something that's permanent. Otherwise it's a shallow chase of the Next New Thing. People like that pretty much wind up sad and lonely.
IMO most "relationships" cause no end of grief...even the good ones seem to falter and fail after a while.
If you believe this, you're hanging out with the wrong crowd or have been repeatedly burned in love. People who have a succession of failed relationships should look to themselves and ask why they're habitually choosing the wrong man or woman. Haven't you ever met any couple that is long-term relationship who are still happy?
And I totally disagree that good relationships fail after awhile. I know several couples who have been together for 30 years and are still very happy and have sex all the time. And I've known my husband since we were both Sophomores in HS and 30 years later, we're still in love and happy. Ups and downs? You bet... but the relationship has never faltered.
You are young. What you want today is different than what you will want 10 years from now. You will change a lot.
Right now, be what you want to be. Your disinclination toward long term relationships will probably serve you well. It will allow you to wait and mature. That's probably much better than rushing into the whole thing before you are ready.
After some self-reflection, I realize I may be too selfish to ever be happy in a romantic long-term relationship. So I think it may be best for me not to have a long-term SO. Hopefully I can have a few flings or some FWB situations. So let's have it, do you think someone can have a happy life without a long-term romantic relationship?
Of course its possible, I would even go as far as saying that its more probable. Ive been single for awhile and am perfectly happy and content with it. Ive had several LTR in the past, some good, some bad - pretty average in that regard, but none of them ended in a marriage. Kids arent my thing, so im not missing a whole lot there, nor do I have any need to start a family. Frankly, I sometimes wonder why there is so much pressure on people to get into marriages and long term relationships, as if it were the only way to live a fulfilling life. So occasionaly my family nagging me or people wondering out loud whats wrong with me since im single, bothers me from this perspective. With that said, I occasionaly date and am leaving all the doors open. If one day I wake up and say "it would be nice to have someone for the long haul" than ill do what i have to do. But for now, perfectly content to be single and with great plans for the future.
I have been single for 20 years and although I would prefer to have a man in my life it doesn't appear to be on the horizon. I am a very happy person, happiness comes from within not from someone. If you can't find happiness when your alone I don't think your going to find it when your with someone. That being said anyone knowing a single man around 60 that loves animals and isn't a drunk or a druggie send me a DM. LOL
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