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It's not about "playing the field," it's about the having the freedom to do as you please along with taking up hobbies (i.e, learning a new language, traveling) that greatly aids in personal development. As a man, you simply can't do these these things when you're married.
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See. This right here is the great lie perpetuated by confirmed bachelors in order to make their married friends feel bad and make themselves feel better.
I can't think of one thing I can't do or haven't done because I am married. Drive cool cars? Travel? Climb a mountain? Drink? Hang out with friends? Get a dog? Motorcycle? Martial arts? Volunteer?
And I can do these things myself OR, better yet, I have someone cool and fun to do all this stuff with!!!!!!
I have plenty of married male friends who meet each other for golf several times a week, go out for guys' dinner, go fishing, go camping, go look at cool cars, go riding.
So I don't know what weird world you are getting this 'you can't do crap once you're married' paradigm, but it's completely off base.
It don't count as America's definition of success. America defines success by money. I don't have a lot of it so America does not consider me or the working class successful.
I consider myself successful. I'm a young black male in my early 20s with a college degree, a job, and no criminal record. America and some here may not consider me much but I don't give a .
I just went to my nephews college graduation. I looked him in the eye and told him good job. I was proud of him, he's doing all the right stuff, and if I knew you..I would do the same.
Good job and keep your head up.... there are many definitions of what is success. Don't pay attention to the media and all the BS that you see around you....
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Originally Posted by OngletNYC
I suggest you stop defining yourself by what "America and some here" may think and define success on your own terms. You sound like a winner to me, time to accept it and act like it. And if I am right, money will follow as you gain experience. Trust me on this.
I can sort of understand why average guys get married in their 20s and 30s, but why do so many guys who are or will likely be highly successful (top law school students, med students, Wall Street guys, successful entrepreneurs, etc) marry in their 20s and 30s?
I understand if a guy wants to start a family one day, but wouldn't it be better to finish school, start making some serious money (6 figures), enjoy the bachelor life while making 6 figures for a good 10 years, THEN look to settle down around 40 to a woman who is around the age of 30? I'm just wondering because I know so many guys who worked very hard to put themselves in a great financial position, but got married/engaged prior to making excellent money and pretty much missed out on everything that comes with being a highly successful, single guy. I just don't understand why so many guys do this to themselves.
Can someone please explain this insanity?
In the business world, a man with a family is seen as more reliable and it's assumed he'll work harder because he has a family to support. You will also find that successful men often have wives who stay home for the same reason. It makes him look responsible and the assumption is he'll do what he has to to keep his job. The assumption may be right or wrong but it's there.
You know why these guys do it? It's because in American society being married is considered part of the process of being "successful."
In other words, getting married in addition to establishing a good career is part of the rites of passage that has been laid out in American culture.
Another serious issue that I have observed is that Western men have a hard time living alone. I have met numerous grown men who can't seem to function without a woman living with them.
Please explain how being married is part of being successful. Anyone, and I mean ANYONE, can get married so I'm not sure how that's part of being successful. Even my loser cousin who can't seem to hold a job for more than 5 months is married.
OOOOOOOOH! Cheaper insurance because you're married. WOW! Sign me up for marriage!!!!
Hay legal "diva", if I wanted cheaper insurance I would just buy a CHEAPER car like a Toyota vs a BMW.
But BY FAR most of the murders are due to romantic relationships gone sour. Also, men die early because they work themselves to the bone in stressful jobs to take care of their families.
#1: even with a beat up Toyota, your rate would be cheaper.
#2: do you have studies or any links to back up your statement that "men die because of being overworked ?". Sounds to me like you are talking out of your rear end.
I just went to my nephews college graduation. I looked him in the eye and told him good job. I was proud of him, he's doing all the right stuff, and if I knew you..I would do the same.
Good job and keep your head up.... there are many definitions of what is success. Don't pay attention to the media and all the BS that you see around you....
Yep...... I agree.
As Chris Rock once said in one of his comedy sketches, "You're not SUPPOSED TO HAVE A CRIMINAL RECORD YOU DUMB-#%%!!"
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Hay legal "diva", if I wanted cheaper insurance I would just buy a CHEAPER car like a Toyota vs a BMW. 
