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Say you are deciding to go on a cruise vacation and want to take your girlfriend... she cannot afford it but you figure you will take her along since you do like her company. However, since now you are going to absorb the cost of 2 instead of one, to save money you opt for the less expensive inside room (no windows), you figure it's a good compromise.
You announce the surprise vacation to your GF, she is happy but not too thrilled about the inside room and complains about it...says you should go for the more expensive window rooms since she knows you can afford it.
How would you feel about it?
I would feel like I really f*cked up maintaining my relationship.
I would never allow myself to be in a relationship with a girl, or reach the point in a relationship with a girl, who when presented with an amazing cruise ship vacation, FREE and paid for by me, would complain about it.
That would be a quick deal-breaker. I would just invite some other appreciative chick.
Say you are deciding to go on a cruise vacation and want to take your girlfriend... she cannot afford it but you figure you will take her along since you do like her company. However, since now you are going to absorb the cost of 2 instead of one, to save money you opt for the less expensive inside room (no windows), you figure it's a good compromise.
You announce the surprise vacation to your GF, she is happy but not too thrilled about the inside room and complains about it...says you should go for the more expensive window rooms since she knows you can afford it.
How would you feel about it?
Time to find another girlfriend - this time, someone who appreciates your thoughtfulness and who you are.
So let me put this question out there ..it's hypothetical, if you offered to take your SO on vac but booked the Motel 6 and he/she refused to stay in such a low class hotel would you think it's a compatibility issue?
yes - I definitely would think it's a compatibility issue. Look, I'm at a point in my life where I want/expect some conveniences. And sorry, but a motel 6 doesn't have what I want - no coffee in the lobby 24/7, for one. However, the only difference between an inside stateroom and an outside is porthole. Service is the same, amenities are the same, bedding is the same. So your comparison doesn't work (for me).
Now, I'm not so stuck up that if Motel 6 is all there is, then that's where we'll stay.
(BTW, I'm not a Crowne Plaza kind of gal - I actually don't like that hoity-toity nonsense.)
It would run deeper than just a motel issue. Why wouldn't the person booking the Motel 6 discuss lodging arrangements beforehand? Yes it's low class, but it's not only that - it's also a lot dirtier and probably in a less safe neighborhood than classier hotels. Cleanliness and safety are two things I will always pay for.
If I couldn't afford to go on a cruise, and a guy said "I'll pay for it but we have to have an inside cabin", I would say no thank-you and suggest an inexpensive beach weekend or something similar. I abhor inside cabins (kind of a claustrophobia thing) and if it was a choice between staying in one, or staying home, I would stay home. If I couldn't afford to at least pay for the upgrade to an oceanview, again, I would decline the invite. There are more expenses on a cruise than just the cruise fare too. Sure, you can travel cheap but it's more fun to be able to take a few shore excursions, buy a few drinks, a nice dinner in one of the "specialty" restaurants on board if you're on certain cruise lines.
I went on a cruise with a guy a while ago. When we first started discussing it I told him that all I could afford would be an outside cabin. The end result was a mini-suite that he paid for. In turn I paid for all the shore excursions for both of us, plus one fancy schmancy dinner on board ($190). In the end, he paid more overall but I think I certainly contributed my fair share to the trip.
Say you are deciding to go on a cruise vacation and want to take your girlfriend... she cannot afford it but you figure you will take her along since you do like her company. However, since now you are going to absorb the cost of 2 instead of one, to save money you opt for the less expensive inside room (no windows), you figure it's a good compromise.
You announce the surprise vacation to your GF, she is happy but not too thrilled about the inside room and complains about it...says you should go for the more expensive window rooms since she knows you can afford it.
How would you feel about it?
I would feel she is ungrateful. This would also lead me to wonder if she is an entitlist who would take me for granted in the future. Not many people get a free vacation handed to them.
If I did something very nice and she responds with..." I don't like the inside of the room...why do we have to stay in a room like that??" instead of "WOw....that was so nice of you!! The room doesn't matter as long as I'm with you and I'm sure we'll have a memorable time! Now, since you've been so nice, I think I'll make you your favorite dish for dinner "
Yep. This is how a real awesome woman behaves. What this guy has is a selfish girl...
I still think it has a bit to do with the approach. If a guy I was dating said, "grab your coat--I'm taking you out to dinner!" and then he proceeds to drive us to McDonalds, I don't think being a bit disappointed is necessarily being ungrateful. Had he said, "let's go get a burger," I'd know better what to expect.
So let me put this question out there ..it's hypothetical, if you offered to take your SO on vac but booked the Motel 6 and he/she refused to stay in such a low class hotel would you think it's a compatibility issue?
Partly, yes. If you are booking at Motel 6 to see how she will react, then you would be baiting her, and that is on you. But if Motel 6 is your idea of a good place, and if it's the place you can afford, then do so. If she complains, I would still dump her and find someone who cares more about you than where she rests her head at night.
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