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well i am going to try and make this short...
just ended a 1yr relationship... he said we wasn't sure if he wanted to be single or in a relationship.. he kept on playing head games with me. its been two months after we really stopped seeing each other and i had a really gut feeling that he was using that as an excuse so he could start seeing one of his coworkers. well i just spoke to him a couple days ago. still trying to play mind games with me but i told him that he cant do this to me bc he is dating that other girl which she is 28 and he is 23... he is still trying to finish his school career he is not even half way his major. while she already has her career set... he wants to say that he is not serious with her but he finally came out to say that if he wasn't seeing anyone would we be intimate and is that an issue that he is seeing the girl....
im sooo confused bc he loves to play with my emotions and i told him that he can't do that to me... that he needs to respect me and value me as a woman just like that woman that he takes out... they are getting closer and he says he doesn't want to loose me as a friend... i still have somewhat feelings for him but i told him to keep his love life to himself.... the less i know the less i get hurt and care....
my ? is how can i be stronger and move on with my life like he has... im not that type to use other people to get over someone bc in my case it never works...
yea there are more to the story and if you have ?'s just ask... and i will be happy to answer them... i even saw pics of them two all happy and stuff... how can men move on quick and not care of how you feel.... im just disappointed in him....im not even hurt anymore bc my heart is numb....
oh and one more thing... he keeps on asking me if im with someone and if i ignore the question he is like who, what, when, and where... he is like why are you keeping him from me... y don't you tell me who he is... when in reality there is no one new.. im just trying to cope and give myself some me time....
sorry that its long... but can someone give me some out put on this... relationships are complicated and frustrating...lol...
He wanted your relationship to be over so it's over. As far as you're concerned it is over also.
Don't take his calls, answer his texts, etc. When he asks if you're seeing someone, it's none of his business. Yes, it will be hard to do but it can and must be done or he'll continue to play you for his little game and the cycle goes on and on.
Tell him to leave you alone. You deserve to be treated better than he would ever treat you. He's shown you what you meant to him.
he finally came out to say that if he wasn't seeing anyone would we be intimate and is that an issue that he is seeing the girl....
As the saying goes, he wants his cake . . .
What I am hearing is that he wants to be free to date. And when he's not busy going out with someone else, maybe the two of you could get together for a little nookie. Is that a problem?
I guess if you have no self esteem, this might work. Otherwise, kick his backside to the curb. Move on, so many men, so little time.
He wanted your relationship to be over so it's over. As far as you're concerned it is over also.
Don't take his calls, answer his texts, etc. When he asks if you're seeing someone, it's none of his business. Yes, it will be hard to do but it can and must be done or he'll continue to play you for his little game and the cycle goes on and on.
Tell him to leave you alone. You deserve to be treated better than he would ever treat you. He's shown you what you meant to him.
I agree with this advice. He can only play you as far as you allow him to. You're in control of your life, not him. So, don't take his calls... find other things to do with your energy and pain like exercise, going out with friends, etc. Allow him to move on and you do the same. A relationship with someone who doesn't really want you is not a relationship you want... you'll understand that eventually.
Take his number out of your cellphone, and send his email to SPAM. He is wasting your time. Move on! Just be glad you aren't married and don't have kids with him. He did you a favor by showing his true colors now!
well i am going to try and make this short...
just ended a 1yr relationship... he said we wasn't sure if he wanted to be single or in a relationship.. he kept on playing head games with me. its been two months after we really stopped seeing each other and i had a really gut feeling that he was using that as an excuse so he could start seeing one of his coworkers. well i just spoke to him a couple days ago. still trying to play mind games with me but i told him that he cant do this to me bc he is dating that other girl which she is 28 and he is 23... he is still trying to finish his school career he is not even half way his major. while she already has her career set... he wants to say that he is not serious with her but he finally came out to say that if he wasn't seeing anyone would we be intimate and is that an issue that he is seeing the girl....
im sooo confused bc he loves to play with my emotions and i told him that he can't do that to me... that he needs to respect me and value me as a woman just like that woman that he takes out... they are getting closer and he says he doesn't want to loose me as a friend... i still have somewhat feelings for him but i told him to keep his love life to himself.... the less i know the less i get hurt and care....
my ? is how can i be stronger and move on with my life like he has... im not that type to use other people to get over someone bc in my case it never works...
yea there are more to the story and if you have ?'s just ask... and i will be happy to answer them... i even saw pics of them two all happy and stuff... how can men move on quick and not care of how you feel.... im just disappointed in him....im not even hurt anymore bc my heart is numb....
oh and one more thing... he keeps on asking me if im with someone and if i ignore the question he is like who, what, when, and where... he is like why are you keeping him from me... y don't you tell me who he is... when in reality there is no one new.. im just trying to cope and give myself some me time....
sorry that its long... but can someone give me some out put on this... relationships are complicated and frustrating...lol...
thank you
I read up to the part where you state, he is dating another woman....and stopped...
that right there, would end it for me...he's not worth the head ache and heart ache, and is playing cruel games with you...everytime you give him your attention, you are inflating his ego..."he wants to see if he still has it" and when you respond to him, it's like giving him more power to hurt you. Drop him and move on...he's not worth it and you deserve more. Much more...and I would take the time to self evaluate and to ask yourself, why you not only allow yourself to be treated like this, but accept to little, and I mean no insult...I've been there, so I do know where your head is at this point in time. And sometimes, you gotta hit people with a 2 x 4 to wake em up...this guy, to me, is no good.
Oh, and the reason he is asking you if your dating anyone else, is b/c the moment you do, he will pretend like he's so in love with you and needs you back, and will do anything to have you back, and once he accomplishes that, he will drop you again, and again....and you'll never get this guy out of your life...your feeding the abuser....more or less...making yourself a victim...this guy is a real womanizer....and will do nothing but chew you up and spit you out. He will.
Sorry, but I'm going to tell you what my couselor told me, a long time ago...first, these people run a pattern...like alcholics and wife beaters...they will drain all your energy...and tell you exactly what you want to hear, just to get their way, and when they have it, they consider it a win, it sustains them and gives them purpose....and then, they move on...he is dangerous to your mental health...and to your life source, meaning, he will drain you of trust, and innocence...so, I suggest, you get rid of him as fast as you can. And believe me, he won't want to let you go...only for the reasons I've stated above.
Stop communication with him as of today, if you haven't already. Don't answer his phone calls or text message, emails, etc. You say you want him to treat you with respect. You must realize that people will treat you with respect if you demand to be treated with respect. If you respect yourself (and you should), do what's best for yourself and end this entire situation. It may be hard to do, but self respect takes willpower. We are often attracted to people that we know are not good for us, and it's hard for us to let them go. This is where the will power kicks in. You know ending this is the right thing to do and as hard it is may be, you'll be happy and proud of yourself that you did it.
Playing these games can just take to much of a toll on your emotions......do you really need/want this??????? TELL THE JERK TO TAKE A HIKE.......PERIOD!! You can do better than this, can't you?????? Have NOTHING to do with this guy. It's a waste of your time.
im just disappointed in him....im not even hurt anymore bc my heart is numb....
When you truley love someone and commit mind, body and soul its more of a betrail on humainity feeling in your heart, sorta mind numbing. I used to think, they could'nt have done this to me if they knew how I truely felt about them.
I know this is going to sound kind of weird but I found hate helped me through the period following a break up, I always heard time heals all and beleived it so I would hate them, then forgive them down the road when I felt better.
It gave me the strength to hold my head up and got me through the period of wanting to bend my beleifs to stay close.
Ray
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