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That changes my viewpoint a bit. People who are free spirits can be very annoying to those around them because of their (perceived) selfish desire to do whatever, whenever the mood strikes them. If she doesn't even go to all the lessons, how can they get better as a couple if only he is willing to go to all the lessons and practice?
Yeah, here's what I take from the OP's second post... she doesn't take it seriously or care about learning to really dance; she just wants to do her own thing. He takes it seriously and cares. This is never going to go well. I still think she's being self-centered. She won't dance with him, but she won't allow him to dance with someone else. GOOD LUCK.
Okay, so what specifically is added in competitive dancing (other than the skimpy little costumes)? Is there no grabbing of the upper legs, or holding your crotch to your partners? Lol, I'm really curious. If you can guarantee me that it's classy nationwide unless a contest is under way, I'll take your word for it. I'm just trying to offer a different perspective here.
Here is a video clip of a typical practice party. This is social ballroom dancing (waltz, in particular), what the couple under discussion would do:
If the husband does his extra practice in the studio with others present, not one on one in another woman's home, there should be no problem for the wife.
If the wife really has an issue with her husband dancing with anyone else period, then she better put on her dancing shoes
Yep, and there are always others present if the place is open, usually older people as well and it's normally alcohol/party free.
Or he can practice any time he wants, with whomever he wants - and not worry about his wifes' immaturity, insecurity and jelousy. Thats wehat a man would do, anyway.
No. A grown, intelligent, rational man is going to find a reasonable, acceptable compromise in any/all situations with the people in his life.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascension2012
Many men today are doormats and pushovers. No wonder their wives and girlfriends dont respect them. SOMETIMES YOU CANT GIVE A WOMAN WHAT SHE SAYS SHE WANTS, IN ORDER TO GIVE HER WHAT SHE NEEDS. True Story.
Speak for yourself and the women you know. You sound like a child. Maturity is one of the most important individual qualities for a successful marriage. That's not what you're bringing to the table here.
Some friends recently asked a question that my spouse and I are debating. Here are the basic facts:
The husband and wife both enjoy ballroom and latin dancing. The husband feels like he needs more practice in order to practice what he has learned in classes and in order to increase his level of proficiency. The wife is satisfied with their currrent level of competency. For her, it's just about having fun when they go out.
Since she doesn't have the patience to practice at home on a regular basis (or for more than a few minutes here and there), the husband suggested finding a woman in the dance community who shares the same need for practice and practice with her on a weekly basis - the idea being that in the long run his increased proficiency would benefit them (the husband and wife) when they go out, and would help him feel less self-conscious when he has to lead in public.
The wife believes dancing is an intimate activity and is not comfortable with her husband sharing that experience with another woman. He says he has no interest in a romantic relationship and that people in the dance community recognize the difference between a dance relationship and a romantic relationship. The wife agreed to dance with him at home more often, but depsite her best intentions, it just hasn't happened.
The couple asked us what we thought, but even we can't come to an agreement on the subject. Maybe its the difference in the way men and women view the world. I'm curious as to what folks here think. Also, say whether you are male or female.
First, I think the guy finding an outside female dance partner is probably a bad idea. I know it's a bad idea if the wife doesn't approve (and I think it is within her rights to disapprove).
I think due to unforeseen circumstances the husband has probably found an interest in the wrong activity, and it would be in everyone's best interest if he gave it up. It's just his misfortune. If only he had found an interest in something he could do alone, or with other guys.
No. A grown, intelligent, rational man is going to find a reasonable, acceptable compromise in any/all situations with the people in his life.
Speak for yourself and the women you know. You sound like a child. Maturity is one of the most important individual qualities for a successful marriage. That's not what you're bringing to the table here.
It seems pretty simple.... either practice with him, or let him practice with someone else.
To me, she has an obligation to choose one or the other.
The husband is open to both options, the wife is open to neither, so she is being unreasonable.
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