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I think too many people fail to understand that what they have to offer is vastly different than what they're seeking and that until they get real with their expectations they're not going to get anywhere. Realistically, unless you're Barbie yourself you're wasting your time holding out for Ken, and vice versa. It's ridiculous to read all the personal ads from people who could easily find someone compatible to themselves but who's "requirements" indicate a refusal to even consider anyone who would logically be interested in them as well.
Maybe they don't really want to find someone? They just don't KNOW that.
Or maybe they really are holding out, because if they want x, y, and z in a partner...then why settle.
I don't know, it's kind of like buying a house. We looked at about 15 houses and every one of them had a "deal breaker" for me. My husband said "can we just buy this one, please". Nope, hated the kitchen. I'm not going to be miserable in a house that I settled for when I know next week a house will hit the MLS that is everything I was looking for...I'll hold out and take my chances.
Probably a bad comparisson, but it illustrates my point.
Maybe they don't really want to find someone? They just don't KNOW that.
Or maybe they really are holding out, because if they want x, y, and z in a partner...then why settle.
I don't know, it's kind of like buying a house. We looked at about 15 houses and every one of them had a "deal breaker" for me. My husband said "can we just buy this one, please". Nope, hated the kitchen. I'm not going to be miserable in a house that I settled for when I know next week a house will hit the MLS that is everything I was looking for...I'll hold out and take my chances.
Probably a bad comparisson, but it illustrates my point.
I think it's a GREAT analogy!
Can you imagine if those houses could post?
Who does she think she is with her long list of requirements??!!! Yeah, I only have a galley kitchen, but who does she think she is? Julia Child??? She'll be sorry, when the market gets better she'll WISH she chose me!!
She rejected me just because I'm a fixer-upper? She could stand some fix-upping herself!! And she has KIDS, they'll destroy everything anyway - women with children shouldn't be so picky!!!
Who does she think she is with her long list of requirements??!!! Yeah, I only have a galley kitchen, but who does she think she is? Julia Child??? She'll be sorry, when the market gets better she'll WISH she chose me!!
She rejected me just because I'm a fixer-upper? She could stand some fix-upping herself!! And she has KIDS, they'll destroy everything anyway - women with children shouldn't be so picky!!!
LMAO...Our biggest deal breaker was the driveway. The worst were the ones with the "curvy" driveways with the rolls...you know, code for "fat". We wanted a flat, level, straight driveway, not something with giant curves.
How would we play our games outside if the driveway is hilly and curvy???
And you know...in the end the kicker was...
We chose the house at the top end of our budget and gutted the kitchen anyway! LOL
That was only the plan if we were buying the lower priced house, not the one at the top of our budget, but sometimes you fall in love with something you didn't even know you would like at face value
I've seen women profiles demanding a man to work hard (= have money), like the finer things lin life (=can afford to take her to expensive places), be in shape, etc. Then you see their pictures and find out she's obese, doesn't have a job, doesn't study, etc.
So? You think the men on there are describing themselves accurately, LMAO, yea right! Just as findly said they mostly troll the women's pictures and then shoot messages to the hottest ones on there. Which is just fine, no reason to waste some woman time that they don't think 'looks good enough' or whatever.
I don't know. My profile got me what I wanted in less than 30 days! I was very descriptive in what I was looking for and got a ton of "hits". It was work to weed through them all but all you need is one. . I only met one person in the flesh because I was extremely picky in who I wanted to spend attention on. That person just happened to be the one. Having high standards meant they would be compatible with me on numerous levels. Better chance for success.
I don't know. My profile got me what I wanted in less than 30 days! I was very descriptive in what I was looking for and got a ton of "hits". It was work to weed through them all but all you need is one. . I only met one person in the flesh because I was extremely picky in who I wanted to spend attention on. That person just happened to be the one. Having high standards meant they would be compatible with me on numerous levels. Better chance for success.
I can't rep you again but I would.
I've never set up a dating profile but if I did, I'd be very demanding too. I thought that was the main advantage of that sort of thing (besides convenience): your ability to be very specific about what you want and not want, so that neither you nor your potential dates waste unnecessary time finding out whether you're compatible or not.
I've never set up a dating profile but if I did, I'd be very demanding too. I thought that was the main advantage of that sort of thing (besides convenience): your ability to be very specific about what you want and not want, so that neither you nor your potential dates waste unnecessary time finding out whether you're compatible or not.
Thanks!
It worked like a charm, but I also knew exactly what I wanted so that helped.
My advice is that you can be physically attracted to many people but they may not be right for you so the partnership is always lopsided. There were many guys that I saw that I was attracted to but I had already dated them so to speak. Many times we date the same person with a different face over and over again because of different reasons. I was ready to end that cycle and get serious about dating someone who was good for me but that I was also attracted to. Anyway that's my success story.
I'm 38 and I don't want a LTR with any gal with children. If she has children of any age, I"ll "sleep" with her and that's about it.
Very noble of you.
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. I only met one person in the flesh because I was extremely picky in who I wanted to spend attention on. That person just happened to be the one. Having high standards meant they would be compatible with me on numerous levels. Better chance for success.
