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It is a difficult situation, I think he has his own suspicions already.
I just can't stand witnessing this though- he's a good guy, hard worker & does everything w/ the family.
Btw, the dude she's sneaking around with is a total loser; he makes no money, (doesn't care to).... parties constantly, has no goals, no property, no ambition, etc.
It is just insane.
Standard operating procedure is to tell the wife you know, and give her the opportunity to either tell your brother or you will tell him yourself.
Imagine the fallout if your brother finds out you knew and did nothing. That is the primary relationship you need to take care of.
Exactly, my loyalties are with him. Blood is thicker than water.
I am aware that the kids are also being introduced to this idiot that she's sneaking around with.
So it will catch up to her, I'm sure.
Oh man...if some skank did that to my brother I would be livid. I'd confront her and tell her that I know and if she doesn't come clean right this minute I'm going to tell him myself. And I would. I normally advocate staying out of these kind of situations, but you can't sit by and watch your own brother get hurt like that.
If possible, get evidence of the adultery, and when she files for divorce and tries to take his money and his kids you can whip out the evidence for his divorce court hearing as an early Christmas Present
If you can prove the other person cheated you can win a lot more than if you just have a normal divorce...most likely women win the kids and his money in that scenario.
But you didn't hear it the first time she said it.
It isn't your relationship.
Be prepared, if you do stick your nose in, to become the sister/aunt no one wants around. The aunt who broke up the marriage and left the children in the middle of a custody battle.
You do not know whether your brother knows and chooses to ignore her "dalliance".
In fact, you do not even "know" she is having an affair - you only suspect it. So you say something to your brother and the instant you say anything, you have changed the relationship between your brother and his wife. Generally, he will become guarded with her, questioning her more on where she is, etc. She will pick up on his lack of trust. Way to go. If there was nothing going on, you may ruin a marriage that was salvagable.
Sorry I disagree with those that say "its not your relationship"
If someone close to me told me they had suspicions, and why, I'd be grateful and look into it. His wife shouldn't be hiding who she is with, period. This is not acceptable on any level, unless maybe her and this other guy are planning a surprise birthday party for the husband, which doesn't sound like its the case.
If its a misunderstanding, he will get over it. If its the truth, he will thank you. And if he doesn't, he is pretty dumb if he takes that "ignorance is bliss" line.
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