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I work at a large airport and started seeing a guy that also works there about a month ago. However I have known him for 2 years. Well recently he has backed out of four dates saying he got busy, was sick, and family emergency. I get vibes that he is no longer interested and so I have backed off. The other day we had to work in the same area and it was pretty slow. He said he was talking to another employee who is apparently interested in me and wanted to know if we were still dating. He said he told his friend that we hadn't gotten a chance to get together because we were both busy but we will again. The fact is that I wasn't all that busy, so i don't know why he is using that excuse. Now I am confused if he wants to still date me.
Are you interested in the other employee? If so, go out with him. It sounds like the first guy is no longer into you, but doesn't want anyone else to be into you either.
"Know about your 'past' with people"? What past? She said she'd only started dating him. I assume "started dating" doesn't mean "started F***ing". I don't see a big issue here, unless the guy who's canceled four times gets manipulative or jealous. I also don't think there's a problem in dating work colleagues as long as they're in a different department, and you don't work together with them much, if at all. Dating someone you share an office with can backfire, that should be obvious.
If it's a large company, then dating should be okay. Where I work, we are infact encouraged to date each other as long as the people involved do not have a reporting relationship or work in the same department. There was even a talk of creating our own version on Match.com for single staff members to meet easily. People spend long hours working and traveling for months, and sometimes only a partner who is in the same situation can easily understand.
OP, it seems like you work at close quarters with this guy though so that was a bad idea. It also seems like he is no longer interested, sorry. But we all learn from mistakes so don't sweat much.
Yeah, if you're gonna date someone from work, make sure it's someone you do not actually work with. Someone who's in a different department, branch, whatever... should be good.
Oh, and definitely NOT a superior (or subordinate). Could be bad news there.
I generally agree it's bad to date someone at work. What happens if it doesn't work out, or worse, ends badly, but you don't want to leave the job because maybe it's a good job.
That said, I have an interesting workplace in that there are are at least 5 couples that work here, myself and my SO included. It's a small (30 employees) science type of consulting company. Maybe it's more common in a science type job. My bf and I have the same degrees and work experience. He has been out of work recently and has been working p/t at my workplace helping me out when I have too many projects. It's easy to hand him a project with a few instructions and know he can take care of it. He works from home. I don't think I want it permanant, but it's ok for now. My manager is very nice to give him some work, something current on his resume, and a work reference to help him out for a little while.
We actually do work in the same department. But since it's an airport we often work in different areas. Sometimes when we are on at the same time I don't even see him. In fact, lately I don't see much of him at work. But that day we did work together in the same area. So is he avoiding me and then leading me on when I do see him?
The issue doesn't seem to be a dating at work issue. Yal aren't dating, nor have you been on a date. I would be questioning whether he really is into you. If he really wanted to go out with you I think he would have by now.
I don't think dating at work is ideal, but it is a good way to meet people. We have a lot of couples at work. We had one get married earlier this year (well the husband no longer works with us). We have another couple engaged and lots of other couples sprinkled throughout the office.
My supervisor is dating a coworker now. They were both married when they got together and have now been together probably 3 or 4 years. It wouldn't have been such an issue, but she was his superior. They ended up having to move him to another team once it was found out. At my company, you can date in the same department just not someone your supervising.
I'm against dating at work. I'd prefer to do it at a restaurant or the movies, or maybe a fair or other special event. Besides, I work at an aluminum foundry, I doubt that many women would think a date there was much fun.
The issue doesn't seem to be a dating at work issue. Yal aren't dating, nor have you been on a date. I would be questioning whether he really is into you. If he really wanted to go out with you I think he would have by now.
I don't think dating at work is ideal, but it is a good way to meet people. We have a lot of couples at work. We had one get married earlier this year (well the husband no longer works with us). We have another couple engaged and lots of other couples sprinkled throughout the office.
My supervisor is dating a coworker now. They were both married when they got together and have now been together probably 3 or 4 years. It wouldn't have been such an issue, but she was his superior. They ended up having to move him to another team once it was found out. At my company, you can date in the same department just not someone your supervising.
We have been on four dates. Plus we ate lunch together all the time before we started dating.
I've dated one of my co-workers before and his cube was right next to mine, but it didn't last long. Lucky for me, they were reorganizing the cubes to make more space so I got assigned a cube on the opposite side of the room so I only had to see him at staff meetings and never had to speak with him.
With that said, I don't think I would ever do that again.
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