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Old 06-30-2012, 03:19 PM
 
Location: Astoria, NY
3,052 posts, read 4,295,161 times
Reputation: 2475

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Quote:
Originally Posted by sablebaby View Post
The brain is not fully developed until about the age 25, and then males are a bit later.
Try a lot later.
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Old 06-30-2012, 03:24 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,089 posts, read 107,180,349 times
Reputation: 115885
Quote:
Originally Posted by animalcrazy View Post
Boy Toy. Fun to play with but not generally husband material, except Mark Kay Letaurneau and Vili Faullaau. I think they're still married. Fast forward when he's in his 40's and she's in her 60's.
V. Fuallau is from a culture in which it's not unusual to marry an older woman. Who knows what will happen to the couple? If they go back to the South Pacific where he's from, he could end up fat and happy, eating the traditional starchy foods, getting big like a Sumo wrestler, and being surrounded by all his kids, in the role of village elder, or something. The cultural differences were never picked up on by the media.

Update: Fuallau is now a DJ in Seattle.
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Old 06-30-2012, 03:37 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,711 posts, read 11,706,526 times
Reputation: 7604
Quote:
Originally Posted by HippyDreamer80 View Post
I am dating a younger man--I am 32 and he is 10 years my junior. He is a great guy and he treats me very well. However, lately, a lot of issues are coming up that put the age difference right out there. It's the proverbial elephant in the room. We know it's there, but we avoid talking about it out-right.

This guy wants children some day. I don't really know that I do want more children (I have one child-a 9 year old-from a previous relationship). He has several hobbies that he enjoys doing, but seems to be under the impression that the time he spends on those hobbies should not change at all if and when we move in together.

On the weekends, he usually spends most of his time here. This past Sunday he couldn't wait to get out of here, much earlier than usual. I invited him over for dinner a couple of nights ago and he declined. He declined because he's recently resumed playing an online RPG. I am starting to feel a little like his hobbies are more important.

And I can't help wondering how much of a future we really have, when I think about the issues that we have. The issues are the biggers ones; religion, children, etc.

what you mean you wonder how much future you have together? Obviously the answers is: not much. this is based on your own words. said yourself you want two different things so how is that going to work out then unless one of you gives up these things? and how often does that happen? I agree with animalcrazy. accept the situation for what it is and what the writing on the wall says -- or find a new situation.
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Old 06-30-2012, 03:48 PM
 
Location: Lower east side of Toronto
10,567 posts, read 12,780,576 times
Reputation: 9399
Traditionally under old Christian orthodoxy a woman is to be at least 7 years younger than the man- My father was 18 years older than my mother_ I was ten years older than my wife...This stuff about dating some one the same age and getting married is brand new stuff that only arrived with the advent of the public school system..where females were mixed in with males the same age..Prior to this- no one dated or married older woman....

I personally resent woman that are with younger men....there is no real future for the man. I have seen young men marry older woman...in about 20 years the guy still looks young..but he appears to be living with his grandmother- woman also do not age as well as males.

Someone suggested that I date this very petite Spanish woman who is very attractive and about 50 years old....I considered it because she is very cute and classy...BUT recently I found out that she was dating a 25 year old man...all I could think of was some older woman so desperate to keep her youth that she would allow some horny boy to be all over her- I would not touch her with a ten foot pole...I really thought she was a mature smart woman...she's a delusional user.
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Old 06-30-2012, 04:10 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,089 posts, read 107,180,349 times
Reputation: 115885
Quote:
Originally Posted by Oleg Bach View Post
his grandmother- woman also do not age as well as males.
ok, we now have this misconception going on on 2-3 threads now. It's the men who don't age as well. Do you call balding at 18 aging well? A lot of guys look like paunchy bald or greying geezers by their 40's. The guys in the grocery store who you think are 65, some of them are actually 48. Get real.
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Old 06-30-2012, 10:50 PM
 
47,525 posts, read 69,510,800 times
Reputation: 22472
Quote:
Originally Posted by HippyDreamer80 View Post
I am dating a younger man--I am 32 and he is 10 years my junior. He is a great guy and he treats me very well. However, lately, a lot of issues are coming up that put the age difference right out there. It's the proverbial elephant in the room. We know it's there, but we avoid talking about it out-right.

This guy wants children some day. I don't really know that I do want more children (I have one child-a 9 year old-from a previous relationship). He has several hobbies that he enjoys doing, but seems to be under the impression that the time he spends on those hobbies should not change at all if and when we move in together.

On the weekends, he usually spends most of his time here. This past Sunday he couldn't wait to get out of here, much earlier than usual. I invited him over for dinner a couple of nights ago and he declined. He declined because he's recently resumed playing an online RPG. I am starting to feel a little like his hobbies are more important.

And I can't help wondering how much of a future we really have, when I think about the issues that we have. The issues are the biggers ones; religion, children, etc.
Are you sure you don't want another kid? That's what it seems you are looking for in this 22 year old.

10 years younger makes a lot of difference when you're 20, it still makes too much difference when you're 30, but when you're 40, 10 years younger isn't such a big deal, and it's less a deal when you're 50, 60, and it shouldn't be a deal at all when you're 70, 80, or 90.

Also a lot has to do with life phases. If you had never had a child, the age difference wouldn't be quite as important but you're been a mother for 10 years, or if he also had a kid -- maybe a 4 year old child, you'd be closer in life phases. There's just too much going against this relationship.
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Old 07-03-2012, 01:21 PM
 
Location: Tulsa, OK
2,449 posts, read 2,866,542 times
Reputation: 5918
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
ok, we now have this misconception going on on 2-3 threads now. It's the men who don't age as well. Do you call balding at 18 aging well? A lot of guys look like paunchy bald or greying geezers by their 40's. The guys in the grocery store who you think are 65, some of them are actually 48. Get real.
I agree. I am on some dating sites, and some of these men my age (51) look like their in their 70s. I have dated 10 years younger and 10 years older. Can not seem to find a happy medium.
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Old 07-03-2012, 09:18 PM
 
Location: U.S.A.
19,613 posts, read 20,090,829 times
Reputation: 28688
Quote:
Originally Posted by HippyDreamer80 View Post
when I think about the issues that we have. The issues are the biggers ones; religion, children, etc.

You can only sweep issues under the rug for so long...
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Old 07-03-2012, 09:27 PM
 
Location: Georgia, on the Florida line, right above Tallahassee
10,471 posts, read 15,793,469 times
Reputation: 6435
Quote:
Originally Posted by HippyDreamer80 View Post
I am dating a younger man--I am 32 and he is 10 years my junior. He is a great guy and he treats me very well. However, lately, a lot of issues are coming up that put the age difference right out there. It's the proverbial elephant in the room. We know it's there, but we avoid talking about it out-right.

This guy wants children some day. I don't really know that I do want more children (I have one child-a 9 year old-from a previous relationship). He has several hobbies that he enjoys doing, but seems to be under the impression that the time he spends on those hobbies should not change at all if and when we move in together.

On the weekends, he usually spends most of his time here. This past Sunday he couldn't wait to get out of here, much earlier than usual. I invited him over for dinner a couple of nights ago and he declined. He declined because he's recently resumed playing an online RPG. I am starting to feel a little like his hobbies are more important.

And I can't help wondering how much of a future we really have, when I think about the issues that we have. The issues are the biggers ones; religion, children, etc.
You sound like you want a relationship. He sounds like he wants a MILF.
If I were you, I'd drop him like a hot rock. Think about it. His imaginary level 42 wizard is more important than you.
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Old 11-02-2017, 10:59 PM
 
Location: Moving to Nashville
1 posts, read 661 times
Reputation: 10
Hi, dating a 22yr old when you are ten years older and a mom is full of pitfalls and your heart and common sense are both telling you how messy and difficult it will likely get. There is no doubt that any single mom if 32 needs and loves good sex. That may be the best thing thing about your relationship. So many issues to think about.
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