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Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,054,732 times
Reputation: 11862
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I hear a lot of dating advice given by both men and women to men about being the 'perfect gentleman': i.e. being polite, respectful, sensitive, kind, caring yet still chivalrous, strong and protective. That's pretty much the 'ideal man' as portrayed in countless pulp fiction novels and rom-com's. Most of this is common sense, and just reflects good character (MOST not all), however...
...now I don't read a lot of dating advice aimed at women, Cosmo or whatever, but I seldom hear the opposite (correct me if I'm wrong). I.e., how to act like a 'lady', when dating, or in a relationship? Is there a lot of emphasis on WOMEN treat their men right, being honest, kind.etc. I mean it's probably not politically correct to say 'be demure, put him first' although it's pretty acceptable to say 'take an interest in what he's interested in.'
Now I'm not starting another rant accusing most women of actually NOT being ladies, but I get the impression sometimes it's seen that the men have the problem with not behaving like 'gentlemen', yet less often do I hear anything that teaches women how to 'behave' in the whole 'courtship/dating' game.
Now I think not all of the old courtly rules of etiquette or convention are even applicable today (like the man ALWAYS paying, for the man deciding certain things), but I do think both genders could learn equally how to be respectful, polite, interested in the other person.etc. What do you think?
I haven't read the book but from reading the blurb/comments it looks like he's not saying anything new, indeed maybe feeding into the old ideas. 90 day rule, men are simple creatures, women aren't setting enough standards?
I haven't read the book but from reading the blurb/comments it looks like he's not saying anything new, indeed maybe feeding into the old ideas. 90 day rule, men are simple creatures, women aren't setting enough standards?
I have read the book.
You asked whether anyone has told women to "act like a lady" as a part of dating advice, and I quickly showed you that the answer is yes, in an advice book that sold so well it became a movie. There is nothing for you to debate here, you have to be mature enough to concede that I have provided you with an excellent example.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,054,732 times
Reputation: 11862
Orphaned. Today's culture basically glorifies women 'acting wild' and glorifying things like strippers, raunchiness, giving the finger to men and society in general. Women are encouraged to 'do what they want', while men are supposed to be these placid, docile, submissive lambs. You see it in internet porn Mod cut: Inappropriate language. which portray women as these sex-crazed beasts. And I actually do blame BOTH men and women for this. Go to any club and you'll see women wearing dresses showing their ass-cheeks, yet nobody calls them out for not being 'classy'. Men love that stuff. Yet on the other hand, a man wears shorts a few inches too short and women are calling him out for lacking fashion-sense? Gimme a break...
Last edited by PJSaturn; 07-07-2012 at 11:59 AM..
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