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View Poll Results: Choose one from the first two, and one from the second two options (two in total)
it should be the man's role to be protector regardless 10 50.00%
it should be up to whoever is stronger, regardless of gender 9 45.00%
i would date a woman who did had no protective instinct at all 1 5.00%
i wouldn't date a woman who had no protective instinct at all 5 25.00%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 20. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 07-10-2012, 10:49 AM
 
Location: Middle America
37,409 posts, read 53,290,191 times
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I've never really based who I date on whether or not they could beat somebody up for me.

I'm taller than my BF. I don't know who's stronger. I know he's more athletic than I am, and definitely has more endurance. I would imagine that he lifts more than I do. But he's not a huge guy. In the five years of our relationship, neither of us has ever needed to physically defend ourselves or one another against anything or anyone.

People who respect and love one another protect one another. I'm not talking about physical aggression, I'm talking about having somebody's back overall. And we each assuredly do that. In that sense, we are both one another's "protectors." This is as it should be.

It's also important to remember that being a large, physically powerful person doesn't ensure that one is physically aggressive. My younger brother is 6'4" and a muscular athlete. He is also gentle, sweet natured, and softspoken...a genuinely kind man. While I'm sure he would intervene if he witnessed someone physically attacking his wife, but overall, he's not a fighter. When he was in his twenties, his sheer size seemed to spur drunks to want to fight him. All he had to do was walk into a bar, and somebody would immediately start stuff with him. So bizarre. At any rate, size, weight, height, strength doesn't necessarily correlate to somebody who's the type of person who would willingly go out and kick some a$$.
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Old 07-10-2012, 11:31 AM
 
2,094 posts, read 3,639,509 times
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When was the last time you felt compelled to protect a woman?
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Old 07-10-2012, 11:45 AM
 
810 posts, read 1,802,574 times
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As long as she's comfortable dating a guy who is smaller than her, I wouldn't have a problem with it. I don't go around feeling like I need to prove anything. I feel the whole primitive "protector" role to be rather outdated in today's modern, contemporary society.
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Old 07-10-2012, 11:48 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,606 posts, read 55,798,724 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gatsby1925 View Post
As long as she's comfortable dating a guy who is smaller than her, I wouldn't have a problem with it. I don't go around feeling like I need to prove anything. I feel the whole primitive "protector" role to be rather outdated in today's modern, contemporary society.
We need more votes people!
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Old 07-10-2012, 12:53 PM
 
810 posts, read 1,802,574 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
We need more votes people!
You need an option for "none of the above," or "there should be no "protector" role."
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Old 07-10-2012, 01:11 PM
 
Location: Corydon, IN
3,688 posts, read 4,998,713 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
We need more votes people!

No, we don't. This is based on feelings and vague opinions which hardly make sense.


You're not going to quantify this.
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Old 07-10-2012, 01:13 PM
 
114 posts, read 213,710 times
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I don't like people indulging in violence over my benefit, because I don't want anyone getting hurt over my benefit, it'd make me feel horrible.

But if I had a girlfriend/Wife who was able to physically protect me, and it came to a time where she did, I'd be fine with it and appreciate her for it. I'm not gonna be all goofy and get to feeling sore about it. I'm not really the type to feel all emasculated. And I wouldn't want to be with a woman who's gonna feel that me being vunerable and her helping me is gonna make her less of a woman.
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Old 07-10-2012, 01:24 PM
 
1,591 posts, read 3,415,240 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mandavaran View Post
Well, I think the old idea of men being so much stronger than women is quickly fading. Maybe in an earlier era but not now. Women are working out more and more, especially in such previously male dominated areas like weight lifting and martial arts.

It's true that men carry more muscle mass but that extra mass is usually in the upper body. Women generally have stronger lower bodies. In a fight, that stronger lower body would enable a woman to have more power as muscles in the butt and legs are bigger than those of the arms and shoulders. She would have better balance in a tussle. Also, a woman's extra fat can translate into more burnable energy as long as she's not morbidly obese. Hence, she may have more endurance and could outlast a man in a fight.

Young girls are competing against boys in all kinds of sports now including football and wrestling at the high school level. YouTube is full of videos of girls winning wrestling matches and tournaments on the boys teams. The difference between the 2 sexes is shrinking all the time.

You take your average 5'10" and 180 lb. guy and match him with a 5'6" 145 lb. woman and she would likely do very well in a fight. Most females I know are much stronger than they look. They just have to have the mindset to fight instead of shrinking from conflict.

Oh, as for the main question, I would hope that if it came down to trouble, we would both work together, fight together and watch each other's back. No helpless female for me.

"females are about 52-66 percent as strong as males in the upper body, and about 70-80 percent as strong in the lower body."
Sex differences in humans - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


If I was dating like, Ronda Rousey, I guess I would expect her to step up if things got ugly

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Last edited by Yac; 01-10-2014 at 03:32 AM..
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Old 07-10-2012, 02:10 PM
 
1,304 posts, read 2,566,357 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mandavaran View Post
Well, I think the old idea of men being so much stronger than women is quickly fading. Maybe in an earlier era but not now. Women are working out more and more, especially in such previously male dominated areas like weight lifting and martial arts.

It's true that men carry more muscle mass but that extra mass is usually in the upper body. Women generally have stronger lower bodies. In a fight, that stronger lower body would enable a woman to have more power as muscles in the butt and legs are bigger than those of the arms and shoulders. She would have better balance in a tussle. Also, a woman's extra fat can translate into more burnable energy as long as she's not morbidly obese. Hence, she may have more endurance and could outlast a man in a fight.

Young girls are competing against boys in all kinds of sports now including football and wrestling at the high school level. YouTube is full of videos of girls winning wrestling matches and tournaments on the boys teams. The difference between the 2 sexes is shrinking all the time.

You take your average 5'10" and 180 lb. guy and match him with a 5'6" 145 lb. woman and she would likely do very well in a fight. Most females I know are much stronger than they look. They just have to have the mindset to fight instead of shrinking from conflict.

Oh, as for the main question, I would hope that if it came down to trouble, we would both work together, fight together and watch each other's back. No helpless female for me.
Where do you get this from? Not true at all. Sure a woman can have comparable lower body strength, but I would bet the average male could squat a lot more weight than the average female.

You are also underestimating the huge difference in muscle mass and weight. 30 lbs is a pretty big weight difference not to mention the average guy might have 20 BF% while the average Female is at 30% or so, so the average guy might have at minimum 50% more muscle mass than the average female.


Young girls are not competing against men in sports all the time. Only a small percentage of them do, and those that do usually can't compete physically. Show me any evidence of females playing football in non-kicker positions in large numbers? They don't because they can't compete physically.
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Old 07-10-2012, 02:34 PM
 
Location: North NJ by way of Brooklyn, NY
2,628 posts, read 4,593,864 times
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I used to wrestle and kickbox and was probably able to kick the butt of half the guys I dated if it came down to it. There was a period of time where my nickname was "Chyna" because I was working out so heavily, I was getting very muscular like the female wrestler. However, no guy ever looked at me as a protector. If anything, they looked at me as a challenge.

I think a lot of guys will look at themselves as kind of taking over as the "protector" role physically, regardless of how you compare to each other body wise, while women will be the "protector" in maternal ways.

Hopefully there will never be a situation where my guy would have to defend my honor and "protect" me, but if push came to shove, I think we would both have our fists up!
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