Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 07-11-2012, 09:35 AM
 
Location: Canada
11,771 posts, read 11,986,606 times
Reputation: 30284

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Beilua Rose View Post
So, is being friends with this guy a HUGE "no-no"?
Yes. Look at how he's treating his girlfriend by interacting with you in such a manner, not to mention how inappropriate it is for him to be getting physical with a coworker.

That is not the kind of person I'd want as a "friend".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 07-11-2012, 09:37 AM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,218 posts, read 100,489,477 times
Reputation: 40198
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beilua Rose View Post
So, is being friends with this guy a HUGE "no-no"?
Yes honey.

He is flirting with you, which is not right when he has a girlfriend already.

Real love doesn't act like that - he is not worth risking your heart over.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 10:09 AM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,711 posts, read 11,713,374 times
Reputation: 7604
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beilua Rose View Post
I'm in my early 20's. I've never had a true, serious relationship. I'm still a virgin and consider myself to be emotionally distant. One thing that I have always known about myself is that I am petrified of relationships, especially romantically connected relationships.

Well, I met a boy. He has a girlfriend who he says he loves VERY much, yet they've been dating for 1.5 years and at this point are constantly fighting. I met this guy at work and we have since known eachother for about three months. He constantly hugs me, picks me up and talks to me like he cares. He texts me and tells me that he is excited to work with me. I look in his eyes and feel my heart hurt.

Of course, me being a pessimist I found myself doubting his affection and figuring it out as a convenience for him. He has made advances towards me before, he's never inappropriately touched me but he has said that I am "gorgeous" or "hot". I ignored him because I don't like to be talked to like that.

He always talked about coming over to my place after work and finally I allowed him to and he stood me up. It hurt. Badly!

How do I not take his flirtatious actions as serious when he knows how to emotionally and mentally engage me. Why does it hurt so much and I am not even going out with him. What is wrong with me?

sorry but you're going to run into nothing but problems with men, being that way. I don't know how to say things except to say them outright. Unless you are more physically open to them (the ones you like back), they aren't going to want anything to do with you. Sorry. They will always move on to someone that is more reciprocal towards their physical needs, period.

people are going to say i'm being negative again and don't know what I'm talking about.

Last edited by Doll Eyes; 07-11-2012 at 10:18 AM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 10:15 AM
 
Location: USA
30,740 posts, read 21,872,773 times
Reputation: 18924
The OP may not be meant for serious relationships. Not everybody is. People who fight all the time can still be in Love, but Love is not a cure all when you are not compatible with someone. No sense in following your heart if it leads you too abuse.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 10:25 AM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,606,283 times
Reputation: 12334
Perhaps one day a single guy will say and do all that to you. Be patient.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 11:02 AM
 
3,083 posts, read 4,869,027 times
Reputation: 3724
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77 View Post
Unfortunely love does hurt sometimes.
I once tripped and fell in love..scuffed my knees
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 11:21 AM
 
5,472 posts, read 7,592,324 times
Reputation: 5793
Love leaves both people usually feeling out of place. I would never get involved with anyone who is currently in a relationship. if you do, remember that you may be this girlfriend one day, who he constantly fights with and he will do to you what he's doing to her.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 02:41 PM
 
400 posts, read 564,762 times
Reputation: 412
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beilua Rose View Post
So, is being friends with this guy a HUGE "no-no"?
It doesn't sound like he wants to be your friend. He may not know what he wants but he is putting his own interests ahead of both you and his girlfriend. A friend would not stand you up or play with your emotions like that.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 04:23 PM
 
202 posts, read 477,311 times
Reputation: 82
Quote:
Originally Posted by Beilua Rose View Post
I'm in my early 20's. I've never had a true, serious relationship. I'm still a virgin and consider myself to be emotionally distant. One thing that I have always known about myself is that I am petrified of relationships, especially romantically connected relationships.

Well, I met a boy. He has a girlfriend who he says he loves VERY much, yet they've been dating for 1.5 years and at this point are constantly fighting. I met this guy at work and we have since known eachother for about three months. He constantly hugs me, picks me up and talks to me like he cares. He texts me and tells me that he is excited to work with me. I look in his eyes and feel my heart hurt.

Of course, me being a pessimist I found myself doubting his affection and figuring it out as a convenience for him. He has made advances towards me before, he's never inappropriately touched me but he has said that I am "gorgeous" or "hot". I ignored him because I don't like to be talked to like that.

He always talked about coming over to my place after work and finally I allowed him to and he stood me up. It hurt. Badly!

How do I not take his flirtatious actions as serious when he knows how to emotionally and mentally engage me. Why does it hurt so much and I am not even going out with him. What is wrong with me?
Wow you sound too much like me, we could be long lost sisters or something. I'd behave the same way as you did in your situation.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-11-2012, 04:30 PM
 
15,013 posts, read 21,606,283 times
Reputation: 12334
"When somebody loves you it's no good unless she loves you all the way"...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:09 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top