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Old 07-12-2012, 06:48 PM
 
601 posts, read 736,715 times
Reputation: 368

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so ive been thinking lately

Im reaching my 30s at what seems to be a rapid pace.

I starting to realize my mast plan pertaining to delaying marriage, kids has back fired miserably



Sure everybody tells me youre fine youll probably meet her around 35 and what not but then i realize what that actually meant!!!!

(1) it will be impossible to find a girl whos never been married/engaged/and never had kids around that age.

(2) If i wanted to someone at that status quo as i am (never married/nor had kids) , id have to start dating girls in their 20s.

Either way id have to settle for less than i feel i deserve.

I dont wonna deal with someones divorce crap or kids. nor do i wonna be a 25 year olds life coach. NOT A CHANCE! I want someone walking next to me. not someone at a different point of their life.

Im young, make good money, followed everything by the freaken book, but even the gardner has built something substantial before i have. wtf??

What seemed right then completely back fired!! shouldve knocked one of them broads up in college when they moaned for it. Yes id probably be paying child support for id have something to show for it.

just got 4 baby shower invitations in the mail! lmao.. another opportunity to highlight this failure.


so what do you guys think??
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Old 07-12-2012, 06:57 PM
 
1,350 posts, read 2,794,507 times
Reputation: 1828
man im in the same boat. i'm about to turn 29 (feels weird just typing that!) in a week's time. i don't know if i'll ever find a girl to settle down with, or even a girl to date long term. heck, i've never even been in a relationship yet! (had a decent number of flings and i get dates often so at least i can't complain too much!).

but yeah, i get the same feeling - if i wait much longer, it'll be that much more difficult to get someone 'fresh' i guess. i've always been into girls in their 20s and i worry abt how i'm ever going to get over that as i get older ;-(

see, as we get older, the dating market just gets less liquid. you just have to accept it i guess and make the best of it...
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Old 07-12-2012, 06:57 PM
 
15,015 posts, read 20,643,361 times
Reputation: 12312
I'm sorry to hear that.

What's wrong with the women who are your age, never been married and without kids?
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Old 07-12-2012, 06:58 PM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,156 posts, read 13,263,468 times
Reputation: 14932
A single guy getting baby shower invites in the mail? Hmm...

Just kidding, man. Honestly if you look at some of the Census Bureau's data you would learn that many people are not getting married or having kids until they have gained a foothold on a career. Seems like this is the script you followed. There are plenty of women (especially in your location) that are in their late 20s and only a few years removed from college or grad school. I would not give up on it yet.

What exactly have you tried to do to meet women that may interest you?
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Old 07-12-2012, 07:05 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
98,984 posts, read 97,605,422 times
Reputation: 110524
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alicant310 View Post

(1) it will be impossible to find a girl whos never been married/engaged/and never had kids around that age.
This is utterly ridiculous. Where do people get these ideas? I must say, though, it's enlightening to see that men stew about this stuff as much as women do. Relax. Don't worry, be happy. There are plenty of women out there without kids. Who gets married and has kids in their 20's anymore? Where do you live, Oklahoma? Maybe location is your problem. Move to the West Coast. You have your whole life ahead of you.
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Old 07-12-2012, 07:09 PM
 
601 posts, read 736,715 times
Reputation: 368
2010 US census showed the avg age for a woman to get married was 26 and 27 more males. lol yep. the whole baby shower thing trips me out. everyone is with their kid and partner and here i am like wtf is wrong with you dude.lol

ive dated and a lot of girls..i just always felt unsure about going fwd with things..eventually relationship dies if the girl doesnt see you moving fwd with things.

but now i realize that hesitance was probably a huge mistake.
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Old 07-12-2012, 07:11 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,711 posts, read 11,318,188 times
Reputation: 7595
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alicant310 View Post
so ive been thinking lately

Im reaching my 30s at what seems to be a rapid pace.

I starting to realize my mast plan pertaining to delaying marriage, kids has back fired miserably



Sure everybody tells me youre fine youll probably meet her around 35 and what not but then i realize what that actually meant!!!!

(1) it will be impossible to find a girl whos never been married/engaged/and never had kids around that age.

(2) If i wanted to someone at that status quo as i am (never married/nor had kids) , id have to start dating girls in their 20s.

Either way id have to settle for less than i feel i deserve.

I dont wonna deal with someones divorce crap or kids. nor do i wonna be a 25 year olds life coach. NOT A CHANCE! I want someone walking next to me. not someone at a different point of their life.

Im young, make good money, followed everything by the freaken book, but even the gardner has built something substantial before i have. wtf??

What seemed right then completely back fired!! shouldve knocked one of them broads up in college when they moaned for it. Yes id probably be paying child support for id have something to show for it.

just got 4 baby shower invitations in the mail! lmao.. another opportunity to highlight this failure.


so what do you guys think??
it's not impossible. I'm 32, never married, no kids. There's lots of CF women on here (even though that's not what you want) there are other women who do not have kids and focused on their careers or whatever. Now they want kids.
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Old 07-12-2012, 07:11 PM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,156 posts, read 13,263,468 times
Reputation: 14932
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alicant310 View Post

ive dated and a lot of girls..i just always felt unsure about going fwd with things..eventually relationship dies if the girl doesnt see you moving fwd with things.

but now i realize that hesitance was probably a huge mistake.
Ah, now we are getting somewhere. So let's try to find the source of this hesitancy. What is it that makes you gun-shy?
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Old 07-12-2012, 07:12 PM
 
601 posts, read 736,715 times
Reputation: 368
i live in the westside lol...Santa monica to be precyse..im just worried because im noticing the #s of single,decent, women my age whom have never been married or had kids is rapidly decreasing. ive tested it even for science purpose on dating sites.
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Old 07-12-2012, 07:14 PM
 
601 posts, read 736,715 times
Reputation: 368
i guess i wanted everything to be perfect. financially, mentally emotionally. but now i realize thats a never ending process
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