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Old 07-30-2012, 04:46 PM
 
Location: Central Florida
1,329 posts, read 831,703 times
Reputation: 737

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I've had a hard time actually getting any responses from people on dating sites. I'm a 36 year old bisexual male. I'm disabled but I figure that wouldn't be the end of the world (I don't drive and I have mild asperger's but I'm otherwise pretty good). Women mostly don't bother responding to my messages that try to engage them, even when we are good matches. I've only gotten responses from gay men, mostly ones that were not good matches for me. What is going on? I thought of starting a seperate profile on a different site that listed me as straight (since I mostly am attracted to women), but I'm not sure this is the only issue.
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Old 07-30-2012, 04:49 PM
 
1,325 posts, read 2,919,159 times
Reputation: 1411
If you are looking for women, don't list that you are bisexual. Most will disqualify you immediately just because of that.
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Old 07-30-2012, 04:57 PM
 
3,124 posts, read 4,935,029 times
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I hear plenty of anecdotes about successful online matches, but see a lot of frustration from such. It's all in how you use it. I am dating two guys right now, both of whom I met through a dating app on my phone.
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Old 07-30-2012, 04:59 PM
 
14,078 posts, read 16,603,075 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DT113876 View Post
I've had a hard time actually getting any responses from people on dating sites. I'm a 36 year old bisexual male. I'm disabled but I figure that wouldn't be the end of the world (I don't drive and I have mild asperger's but I'm otherwise pretty good). Women mostly don't bother responding to my messages that try to engage them, even when we are good matches. I've only gotten responses from gay men, mostly ones that were not good matches for me. What is going on? I thought of starting a seperate profile on a different site that listed me as straight (since I mostly am attracted to women), but I'm not sure this is the only issue.
Online dating can be tough for lots of people, but all I can say is that non-disabled straight women who drive would most likely be looking for non-disabled straight men who drive.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10 View Post
If you are looking for women, don't list that you are bisexual. Most will disqualify you immediately just because of that.
True, but I don't think he should be dishonest about it. If he's bisexual, he should state that.
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Old 07-30-2012, 05:03 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,711 posts, read 11,729,169 times
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sorry but some of the things you posted are probably keeping the women from responding if you put that in your profile. and also it is a waste of time if you're not even that attractive in the first place. mostly all the people do is scroll through the pictures and respond to the best looking ones.
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Old 07-30-2012, 05:06 PM
 
1,325 posts, read 2,919,159 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post


True, but I don't think he should be dishonest about it. If he's bisexual, he should state that.
They don't need to know right away.
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Old 07-30-2012, 05:20 PM
 
14,078 posts, read 16,603,075 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10 View Post
They don't need to know right away.
Yes they do. But hey, people lie online about everything else. Why be honest about your sexuality?
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Old 07-30-2012, 05:25 PM
 
1,325 posts, read 2,919,159 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
Yes they do. But hey, people lie online about everything else. Why be honest about your sexuality?
If he puts that he's bisexual, 95% of the women on that site will disqualify him immediately. He at least needs to go on a date first before telling them something like that. If they hit it off during the first date, then maybe he can tell them then and they won't run for the hills and will give him a chance. It's much easier for someone to accept certain things about you if they already like you as a person.

Everything has an appropriate time and a place.
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Old 07-30-2012, 05:25 PM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,349,138 times
Reputation: 19814
I like online dating. I found my SO that way, or he found me, rather.

I agree with some of the other posters, that straight women are looking for straight men. I would say you would have better luck with listing yourself as straight, but also, on the flipside, I would want to know that.

With the Aspergers, you may be approaching things differently than people without it may, and they may not understand. I don't know what your other disability is, or what your profile says, or how your pictures look, etc.....
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Old 07-30-2012, 05:27 PM
 
Location: NoVa
18,431 posts, read 34,349,138 times
Reputation: 19814
Quote:
Originally Posted by bicoastal10 View Post
If he puts that he's bisexual, 90% of the women on that site will disqualify him immediately. He at least needs to go on a date first before telling them something like that. If they hit it off during the first date, then maybe he can tell them then and they won't run for the hills and are willing to give him a chance.
That's a tough one. As a straight woman, I would not want to date a bisexual man....at all. I wouldn't want to hit it off on that first date and see the man a few more times to find that out....

I wonder if there are any dating sites specifically for people who are bisexual?
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