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Firstly, I fully believe men and women are equal. Both as human beings and in terms of rights and abilities. We are different in some ways but equal overall. But looking back over the past 50-60 years, it seems people have been marrying less, marrying later in life, or not marrying at all. So I'm trying to understand what is driving this? I can't help but draw a correlation with the rise of women in the workforce and wondering if this is a key driver. I've meet so many single women who are 35+ who just can't find someone and admit they may not procreate. How did this happen?
I'm sure it has. If your primary goal in life was to be a housewife, it made sense to marry younger, whether it was the right decision or not. Financial independence creates options in just about every area of life, including this one.
Women are no longer dependent on men to provide them with the necessities of survival. This is awesome. I might not find anyone to marry and probably won't "procreate," but I'm fine with this. I live an independent life and do pretty much whatever I want. I have a good career, friends and family to whom I'm devoted, hobbies and interests, etc. This is not necessarily a bad thing, ya know?
Maybe I will find someone I want to be with, but it's not a necessity for my survival. If I want or need something, I work for it and provide it for myself. Should I actually end up with a man in my life on a permanent basis, it will be because I chose to do so, not because I had my back against the wall. Should I have a child, either biologically or through adoption, it will be because it is something I dearly wanted and chose to do, and not something that was required of me from a partner or expected by society.
If you want kids and a husband, I guess you have to prioritize that. I chose not to, and I don't regret it. I'm 36, single and not terribly put out by it.
Firstly, I fully believe men and women are equal. Both as human beings and in terms of rights and abilities. We are different in some ways but equal overall. But looking back over the past 50-60 years, it seems people have been marrying less, marrying later in life, or not marrying at all. So I'm trying to understand what is driving this? I can't help but draw a correlation with the rise of women in the workforce and wondering if this is a key driver. I've meet so many single women who are 35+ who just can't find someone and admit they may not procreate. How did this happen?
It's just the evolution of our culture.
Starting with Rosie the Riveter during WW II when women began to fill in for men who were being shipped overseas to war, it began to occur to society that maybe women COULD do some of the same jobs as men.
Since that time, more and more women have sought higher education which has lead to more women in the corporate and business world.
But contrary to the bill of goods some have tried to sell, very few women can really "have it all".
Life is about choices, and making the best ones you can for yourself.
It's up to each one of us to take that responsibility seriously and make our lives what we want them to be
Women are no longer dependent on men to provide them with the necessities of survival. This is awesome.
Yes, they are no longer dependent but they still want the privileges (entitlements) that came along with the old system. Many young men including myself have no problem with this and we're labeled misogynists when that's not the case at all.
I understand the whole concept not wanting to have children. If you are not ready or don't want to have kids, then you should not bring them into the world. I also understand women are now more financially independent and don't need a man to support them, which is good. Someone should not have to settle.
But many woman I have met openly want to settle down but cannot find anyone? Does financial independence create an unrealistic expectation or raise the bar too high when looking for a life partner?
50-60 years ago, many women realistically could not support themselves. Most lived with their parents until they married. Instead of being encouraged to figure out what they wanted to be and what they wanted to do in life - they were encouraged to find a husband and have children. Also, most men weren't encouraged to figure out what they wanted to be - they were often told what they were going to be. Both men and women have more freedom and encouragement to find what they want to do with their life - including finding the right the right career and the right person and not just the family business and the first person.
It plays a HUGE factor, it's also one of the main 2 reasons for the marriage decline IMO
People just started getting married for "love" like 30 years ago. It was more of a contract or an agreement. Before it was the women marries the man, he supports her financially and protects her. In return she provides sex, housework,Companionship and bears his children.
Now Women don't need men to support them financially anymore, And men don't need to Marry women to get sex, companionship, and someone to bear there children
I understand the whole concept not wanting to have children. If you are not ready or don't want to have kids, then you should not bring them into the world. I also understand women are now more financially independent and don't need a man to support them, which is good. Someone should not have to settle.
But many woman I have met openly want to settle down but cannot find anyone? Does financial independence create an unrealistic expectation or raise the bar too high when looking for a life partner?
Previously marriage was an economic necessity. Now it's a choice, so women are looking for an emotional connection that they probably didn't worry about before. However, that's a very nebulous and undefined thing. It's hard to pin down, and there's a sense that you don't want to make a mistake. So you wait too long maybe.
Plus, too, you get set in your ways as you get older and compromise and accommodation become more difficult. My father married my mother when he was 40. She was 16 years younger, and she was the one who spent her life accommodating him to a ridiculous degree because he simply wouldn't budge.
, so women are looking for an emotional connection that they probably didn't worry about before..
You mentioned that more women are in the business and corporate world now. There have been articles telling how women in higher ranks wonder why they can't find a man. It explains they can, but want to find a man in their career class on a level or higher than theirs.
That means boss lady isn't willing to marry down to the people under her in the office. She's not interested in the clerk, only someone the same rank or higher. It also means she waited into her mid to late 30's to look for a husband but still expects to reel in the top of the heap of men to have kids with.
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