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Old 08-07-2012, 09:45 PM
 
43 posts, read 28,750 times
Reputation: 24

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShinyNewGuy View Post
Yeah, actually it does sound crazy. I don't know if this is a chemical issue or what. I feel like I can't get enough of her. In the past if we were sitting on the couch together, I'd be happy to be sitting next to her but not holding hands or anything. Now I want her leaning up against me. I want to hold her hand. I just want to feel her next to me.

I want to have sex with her all the time, but it's not just that. I want to have her up close to me as we're lying in bed just so I can feel her skin against mine.

I know she's been enjoying it. But at some point she probably won't care for it too much. Then I texted that I missed her. At that point I wondered if I'm going overboard. I feel now like I need to be careful not to smother her. So I haven't texted or spoken to her all day despite a burning urge to do so. This feels a bit disturbing because I feel ultra vulnerable now.

WTF is wrong with me? Have you guys gone through this? I googled, but all I could find is people asking how to get a spouse to fall in love again - presumably because they can't stand each other.
Braggart
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Old 08-07-2012, 09:48 PM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
3,663 posts, read 7,983,675 times
Reputation: 3716
Are you going through some unusual stress? The sudden onset of clinginess could be a symptom of another problem, do you fear her losing interest in you, so you are going overboard to prove you have a sensitive side? Any emotional problems? If this was a new marriage it would be "cute" ...when you've been together over 20 years, a sudden change could mean something else is going on.
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Old 08-07-2012, 10:19 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
87,897 posts, read 81,705,420 times
Reputation: 91779
Quote:
Originally Posted by asitshouldbe View Post
Are you going through some unusual stress? The sudden onset of clinginess could be a symptom of another problem,
This could be a possibility. Have you been under chronic stress at work, had a death in the family, moved or changed jobs, any sudden stressors? Do you sleep ok?
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Old 08-07-2012, 11:06 PM
 
8,782 posts, read 8,007,108 times
Reputation: 9494
^^
this was what i was going to ask. "something" would have had to trigger you
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Old 08-07-2012, 11:33 PM
 
3,445 posts, read 3,936,301 times
Reputation: 4922
Never heard of a husband or wife LOVING their spouse TOO MUCH. Just not possible. LOL!!
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Old 08-07-2012, 11:52 PM
 
93 posts, read 120,958 times
Reputation: 72
Quote:
Originally Posted by imcurious View Post
What do you think is wrong with you? Do you have dependency issues? Are you depressed, going through a difficult time of some sort? You seem to realize this is abnormal and won't go over well after awhile. It seems very needy. Have you seen a therapist? It sounds like a childhood abandonment issue may have been triggered and that you are reaching out for "mommy."
- I have no idea.
- Not that I know of
- Not that I'm aware of
- No, I heven't seen one
- I suppose that's possible .. but it doesn't really ring true for me

Not sure what it is. Part may be hormonal maybe. Part may be that lately I've backed off from focusing on career as a goal and more about smelling the roses. This is a more recnt trend for me. But othet than that, I really am not sure.
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Old 08-07-2012, 11:54 PM
 
93 posts, read 120,958 times
Reputation: 72
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cow View Post
I'm pretty sure you can find a reason to rain on anyone's parade. Maybe next, you can find a thread about someone surviving cancer that you can roll your eyes at too?
Thanks. But in all fairness, I have to admit I might have the same reaction if I read a post like mine. I hate that it sounds so damn cheesy. This is not like me at all.
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Old 08-07-2012, 11:55 PM
 
93 posts, read 120,958 times
Reputation: 72
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
This could be a possibility. Have you been under chronic stress at work, had a death in the family, moved or changed jobs, any sudden stressors? Do you sleep ok?
No, nothing major. Just the usual stresses of a job. I've been having to travel out of town more lately. Maybe I just miss her more?
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Old 08-07-2012, 11:59 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
87,897 posts, read 81,705,420 times
Reputation: 91779
Quote:
Originally Posted by ShinyNewGuy View Post

Part may be that lately I've backed off from focusing on career as a goal and more about smelling the roses. This is a more recnt trend for me.
This is a good thing. This is great! Have you discussed it with your wife? Sit down with her and have a heart-to-heart talk. Buy her flowers, to kick off "the talk". Maybe tell her in advance you've been wanting to spend more time with her, and you'd like to talk to her about it, so you'll be sure to have her full attention, and she'll make time after work or on the weekend. Let us know how it goes.

Didn't you say the kids were out of the house, and the nest is empty now? That probably has a lot to do with it. Let her know you want to enjoy the empty nest, the two of you. Maybe offer to take her out to dinner after "the talk", to celebrate the newly-empty nest, and kick off a new life for you two. Could be cool. Could be very romantic.
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Old 08-08-2012, 12:13 AM
 
93 posts, read 120,958 times
Reputation: 72
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
This is a good thing. This is great! Have you discussed it with your wife? Sit down with her and have a heart-to-heart talk. Buy her flowers, to kick off "the talk". Maybe tell her in advance you've been wanting to spend more time with her, and you'd like to talk to her about it, so you'll be sure to have her full attention, and she'll make time after work or on the weekend. Let us know how it goes.

Didn't you say the kids were out of the house, and the nest is empty now? That probably has a lot to do with it. Let her know you want to enjoy the empty nest, the two of you. Maybe offer to take her out to dinner after "the talk", to celebrate the newly-empty nest, and kick off a new life for you two. Could be cool. Could be very romantic.
I already spoke with her yesterday. It's all fine. One of the kids is out of the house, the other is 15. The oldest is back for the Summer but they were gone for 2 weeks. We just had a small taste of "empty nest"

That said, I'm in no hurry for that. I like having the kids there as well.
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