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SWB, I hadn't been keeping up - congratulations! I didn't know this had blossomed into the full love affair...I'm very happy for you and hope this is the forever one! Be good.
i knew I was different then the other kids when i was about 6 yrs old. I of course didn't know why or what was different but i knew that i was not the rough and tumble kid that my male friends were. i was more comfortable with the girls an the less violent games. I just knew.
well.
My name is Jasmine.
im 16 years old and i am a proud lesbian.
theres a lot that comes with being homosexual.
i lost my best friend of 13 years because she thought i was just copying her. which i wasn't....she threatened me because of it...and forgiveness is out of the question.
i started out dating a lot of guys and as time went on...i fouind myself being more and more attracted to women. then....i became "bisexual"....a few months after that, i had more thoughts about being completely gay...i still dated guys, but it was only to make myself believe i wasn't a lesbian.
i finally realized after dating several more guys that i was in fact a lesbian.
i always knew...i just didnt realize it...i always found it easier to see a female as a potential mate then a male...in movies...women struck me harder than men did,
i realized i was gay...in the 4th grade....a close friend of mine told me to kiss her...at the time i didn't know there was such a thing called homosexuality...i thought every other girl kissed other girls....when i got into 6th grade...i was attracted to another close friend...i came out to her and told her i wanted to kiss her....she got freaked out and never talked to me again...
my experiences taught me a lot about myself...you know yourself better than anyone...dont let others get to you...i did and it took a turn for the worst.
be yourself....if you dont accept who you are you'll find that others wont accept you either.
i have a wonderful girlfriend.
and shes everything i ever wanted.
be free, let yourself experiment.
try new things.
find out who you are.
I knew I was gay when I was young but I went into denial. I did the track and football thing and dated lots of women. I even got married and had a son. But I always knew deep down inside that I am gay. I think for most people it is biological but there are envrionmental issues that play into it so each person is different in terms of being gay. I did have same sex fantasies but never actual sex until I was a bit older. Once I had a positive experience, all bets were off and I came out. Hope that helps.
Hmm, this seems to be a ringing theme here. So how does one (a straight female) know if her boyfriend, fiancee, or husband, is gay or has gay feelings??? Are there "warning signs"?? If one of your ex girlfriends, or you ex wife asked you if you were gay, would you have told them the truth? Is there a certain way to ask this question?
Hmm, this seems to be a ringing theme here. So how does one (a straight female) know if her boyfriend, fiancee, or husband, is gay or has gay feelings??? Are there "warning signs"?? If one of your ex girlfriends, or you ex wife asked you if you were gay, would you have told them the truth? Is there a certain way to ask this question?
It's called denial and by its very nature the person in denial would answer "no" as they are in denial and don't believe themselves to be gay (even though they know deep down). I was married, have two kids. The guilt is overpowering and as the gay spouse you are most often painted as the villain who decieved your spouse, etc. Most psychologists will tell you the gay spouse needs as much, if not sometimes more, support than the straight spouse.
Now I am a straight male who has always supported the possibility of homosexuals getting civil unions, or even married in Churches that will allow gay marriages in their church. I don't believe a church should be forced to marry someone they don't want to, however. But I am all for gay rights.
However, a couple months ago I found out that I have a gay brother. And what puzzled me the most is that his entire life, he had always been a lady's man. Always digged chicks, and had plenty of girlfriends. He is 18 now, and came out when he was 17.
Emphasis mine. What is "his entire life"? 3 years? 4 years? If you had said this about someone in his at least mid-20s there may be some lengthy history to question... but in this case you likely have a kid who played the expected game until he came out. I understand that to you it seems as though he changed overnight... but what most likely happened is that he just stopped pretending.
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I am just curious as to input on whether or not this is some type of biological mechanism, or something you 'learn' or create overtime. Possibly a mixture of both? Say you are born with a different chemical makeup in the brain, and that enables you to be more susceptible to being gay.
Again, not trying to offend, but I am sick of hearing people who don't know what the hell they are talking about tell me their opinions. I would much rather hear it from gay people themselves. I am not going to debate you on anything, or insult you because frankly I believe that is ignorant. All I want is first hand knowledge, which is more important than any straight persons opinion who doesn't know what it is like to be gay.
If you could tell me when you started having homosexual feelings, and when you finally came out gay too, that would be great.
Almost every gay man I know, myself included, has felt the gayness as long as we can remember. Some pretended to be straight longer than others. I said "almost" because there are gay men who have told me they didn't have gay urges until later in life and they didn't seem to have anything to hide.
Some people know it from the very beginning.
Others don't choose to acknowledge it until later. (Either through denial or fear or desire to fit in)
There is no standard set time.
It isn't so much when someone "becomes gay" because it is always there I believe, as when a person realizes it and acknowledges it and "comes out" first to themself and then to others. Some people never get there.
Many people growing up in our culture are so disconnected from their bodies, and so uncomfortable with their own sexuality in any way shape or form, either from guilt, shame, social pressure, religious propaganda, or any of a number of reasons, that they don't even want to delve into it, but instead just go along with what they're told they should do.
I had a friend who told his father he was gay and his dad had a heart attack! That devastated him as he was always close with his father. This is a friend who excelled in sports, was into bodybuilding and never acted "fem". We used to work on, and ride dirt bikes and atv's as well. It does not seem to be necessary to have a bad relationship with dad to be gay. However, I have found that all fem guys preferred their mother or did not have a good male role model. The funny thing is that some fem guys are actually having sex with women....strange huh?
SWB, what a beautifully written post! I am touched by your honesty and openness. And you're a great writer too!! I hope you continue to share your story.
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very young
heterosexually challenged
