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Yes, I think it is realistic to find true love and romance well into "middle age" ... and if that is what you are longing for, I say GO FOR IT!
My question for you is: what is "middle aged"? Some people think they have reached middle age before 40, others say it's between 40 and 55 and still others say middle age lasts until your retire at 65. (In my opinion, "middle age" is between 41 and 59 - but that's just my opinion).
Finding the great love of your life is not easy at any age and therefore I think a "FWB" is a good substitute. That is my present situation, and I'm not complaining.
My mother has had several long-term relationships since her divorce at 52 or so. She's now past 65 and happily dating around. It's possible for an older woman to land a relationship, but you have to be a bit of a standout. My mom literally glitters. She just has a very effervescent personality that draws men to her. Her last boyfriend was a total douche, but she's also dated a guy I wished would become my stepfather - they remain friends to this day.
My father is over 80 and has been in an open relationship with a woman who is my mother's age for the past 15 years. She seems happy. But pop's a narcissist and she's a sociopath and they both pursue other partners. That setup weirds me out.
Yes, I think it is realistic to find true love and romance well into "middle age" ... and if that is what you are longing for, I say GO FOR IT!
My question for you is: what is "middle aged"? Some people think they have reached middle age before 40, others say it's between 40 and 55 and still others say middle age lasts until your retire at 65. (In my opinion, "middle age" is between 41 and 59 - but that's just my opinion).
Finding the great love of your life is not easy at any age and therefore I think a "FWB" is a good substitute. That is my present situation, and I'm not complaining.
Ditto. There are plenty of men out there looking and wanting to date me and my single -excuse me- divorced female friends. The problem is that there feels like there is no room in my stuffed life to devote as much energy as I should to a relationship. And I have not met anyone who makes me want to shift gears and put them first. It could happen. It just hasn't. Maybe it won't.
FWBs are awesome for this situation. Emphasis on the F and the emotional connection they provide without the commitment/drama/time-suck factor.
My problem as a single man in my 50s is that I think I might be "stuck in my ways" ...
I am open to being in a committed serious relationship, but at this point in my life I have certain habits and routines I don't think I could easily change if I needed to in order to accommodate the other person. Don't get me wrong, I am in favor of compromise and I have no problem giving up the "single lifestyle" for fidelity and monogamy for someone I love.
Here's an example: I bought 120 year old large Victorian house a dozen years ago and my main hobby and preoccupation has been restoring it to it's former grandeur and furnishing it in the opulent late-19th Century style. What will I do if a "significant other" moves into our home and wants to redecorate it? Usually men will concede the home decor to the woman as long as he has his "man cave." However, I put a lot of research, time, expense, and sweat into the place and I confess it would upset me if color schemes, complex window treatments, furniture arrangements, etc. had to be changed.
My problem as a single man in my 50s is that I think I might be "stuck in my ways" ...
I am open to being in a committed serious relationship, but at this point in my life I have certain habits and routines I don't think I could easily change if I needed to in order to accommodate the other person. Don't get me wrong, I am in favor of compromise and I have no problem giving up the "single lifestyle" for fidelity and monogamy for someone I love.
Here's an example: I bought 120 year old large Victorian house a dozen years ago and my main hobby and preoccupation has been restoring it to it's former grandeur and furnishing it in the opulent late-19th Century style. What will I do if a "significant other" moves into our home and wants to redecorate it? Usually men will concede the home decor to the woman as long as he has his "man cave." However, I put a lot of research, time, expense, and sweat into the place and I confess it would upset me if color schemes, complex window treatments, furniture arrangements, etc. had to be changed.
My problem as a single man in my 50s is that I think I might be "stuck in my ways" ...
Here's an example: I bought 120 year old large Victorian house a dozen years ago and my main hobby and preoccupation has been restoring it to it's former grandeur and furnishing it in the opulent late-19th Century style. What will I do if a "significant other" moves into our home and wants to redecorate it? Usually men will concede the home decor to the woman as long as he has his "man cave." However, I put a lot of research, time, expense, and sweat into the place and I confess it would upset me if color schemes, complex window treatments, furniture arrangements, etc. had to be changed.
Great example! I think some women would be impressed! Unless they hated your taste in decor, of course. (Red was big in the Victorian era--ugh!) Your project sounds very cool. What city is this gem in, if I may ask? Not San Francisco?
My problem as a single man in my 50s is that I think I might be "stuck in my ways" ...
I am open to being in a committed serious relationship, but at this point in my life I have certain habits and routines I don't think I could easily change if I needed to in order to accommodate the other person. Don't get me wrong, I am in favor of compromise and I have no problem giving up the "single lifestyle" for fidelity and monogamy for someone I love.
Here's an example: I bought 120 year old large Victorian house a dozen years ago and my main hobby and preoccupation has been restoring it to it's former grandeur and furnishing it in the opulent late-19th Century style. What will I do if a "significant other" moves into our home and wants to redecorate it? Usually men will concede the home decor to the woman as long as he has his "man cave." However, I put a lot of research, time, expense, and sweat into the place and I confess it would upset me if color schemes, complex window treatments, furniture arrangements, etc. had to be changed.
120 year old victorian being restored is really awesome. I'm a fan of old houses, always thought they wre much better looking than the new age housing.
Onglet to answer you question, I am now 50 (how did THAT happen?).
To be accurate, I am divorced for 17 years now. I guess I used "single" in the title of thread as "divorced" is a bit of a downer IMO. But, this topic absolutely includes divorced persons.
And to Clark, I would agree, I consider middle aged around 45-55. Seems to me that "older" is getting younger and younger (if you know what I mean!) in our youth obsessed culture. 10 years ago, when I was 40, I didn't consider myself old or middle-aged AT ALL. Today, you look at the media, and on this very forum, and 35 year old women are referred to as over the hill!! Ludicrous. At this rate, in a few years you will have to be a fetus with boobs and a killer portfolio to get any action
I have been lucky and have had quite a few relationships both long and short term, 6, 7 years and months to 2 years since my divorce. They obviously didn't last, but I consider them successful anyway.
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