Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have been happily married for 30 years, but my spouse has a major depressive disorder requiring a multitude of heavy duty psychiatric meds which has rendered her, especially in the past few years, sexually frigid. We have had intimate relations about 4 times in the past 3 years. I take my wedding vowels serious - "through sickness and health" and have been and plan on continuing to be 100% faithful, but it's not easy.
Curious if anyone else is in a similar situation, and how you are dealing with it.
We were in that situation at one point with his physical issue and one of the medications I was taking. He still has the issue however it is not something that cannot be dealt with it just takes a bit of extra time and I quit taking that one medication about a month ago (give or take a week or so) and that part of our issue is gone.
I can sympathize with your dilemma and I commend you for wanting to continue to be faithful knowing how tough that can be after many years of intimate contentment and pleasure. I wish you and your wife the best now and in the future.
Citing this example along with the happy highs one experiences in any aspect of life is why many depressives and bi-polar people go off their medications and subsequently have to go through what may have taken 10 years to get to all over again. There are side effects to medication no matter what it is for.
However, "intimacy" comes in many forms, not simply sex, and over time we definitely neglect those little on-going intimate things we did for each other and go straight to physical sex as the end all of intimate relations. There are for example things like cuddling on a lawn chair together at night and just talking about whatever, small, non physical gestures that bring a couple closer out of the bedroom will make them closer in the bedroom.
Serious illness aside, relationships change and people change and develop and grow to become a new person in all relationships, even friendships. It may be time to look back at your initial courtship and draw on those aspects and gestures you both did in order to court this 'new' person in your life. What was it about her that really made you think she was the one. Do you recall your dating time with her - possibly it was the laughter about things which really triggerred an interest. Focus on those things first and reintroduce all the things you did when you met her the first time and take your time as you did then. Give those simple attention gestures for no reason they do make a difference.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
