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Frankly, there is nothing in life that I can honestly say I am 100% sure of. As I said before, having such a gift would imply that a person was psychic. I don't believe you can ever be that sure.
Very true. We can think we are 100% sure, but at some point, we are taking some of what we believe to be true on faith. It may be educated faith, based on observed behavior, but it is still faith.
Can you really think that you are all that much different than the fifty percent of the population who divorce? You are smarter, more perceptive, you and your spouse are that much more idealistic? God immunes you from such tragedy? God's special child?
Ladies, if YOU had maybe a million and a half in savings and met a wonderful man with only a hundred thou, would YOU ask for a prenup?
Would your answer change if you were both in your forties and he had already had a few failed marriages?
By the way, are people here aware that in England there are more people living together without marriage than not? The big trend there is that most do NOT marry, even with kids.
Yeah, but here in the U.S.A., even if you do that, you are still not immune from the whole thing where the courts can still recognize an unmarried couple as being the equivalent of a "common-law marriage" (I believe that is the technical term for that). So not being married to someone (unfortunately) still isn't a foolproof defense to prevent them from being able to still legally take you to the cleaners...
Last edited by Phoenix2017; 08-22-2012 at 12:18 PM..
Reason: Clarified language
I'm not naive, I'm realistic.
If I didn't feel like I could truly trust the person with my life and my finances, I wouldn't get married. There is no need for a prenup if there is no marriage.
Marriage is not a requirement in life. I'm not sure why some are so hung up on this.
I did not leave you that rep, but I agree with it's spirit. I think if a person experiences life and gets to know enough people he or she learns that there are intangibles in human nature that you cannot be sure of, that you think you know someone and then they throw you a zinger. Some people are just bored with their lives, never complain, but all of a sudden take a surprising turn. Paul Gauguin had a nice lucrative life, and shocked everyone by leaving for Tahiti. Not all of us are that predictable.
#1 - Nope, we have 1 joint checking and MM account
#2 - Nope, all our accounts are joint
#3 - Nope, other than our 401K accounts all assets and funds are joint
#4 - Nope, never even thought about it
Damn, Mr. UNC4Me and I have been doing it wrong for 30+ years. Don't know how we've survived so long without the appropriate level of financial mistrust and paranoia necessary for a successful marriage.
Hey, fifty percent of marriages stay together, too. Hard work, helping and respecting each other, but also some luck are involved. It is the 'luck' aspect that the prenup tries to shelter us from.
Frankly, there is nothing in life that I can honestly say I am 100% sure of. As I said before, having such a gift would imply that a person was psychic. I don't believe you can ever be that sure.
Okay, point taken. Even so, I'd have to be extremely certain.
I like to think most people aren't schmucks being that I haven't run into too many in my lifetime. I just think some people take marriage too lightly, and believe a prenup is going to protect them. That isn't always the case so it's just better to be certain this is the person you want to share your heart and your money with.
If someone questions my character enough to ask me to sign a prenup, i'ts my opinion they are making a poor choice. You shouldn't have to question something like that in the person you want to spend your life with. Maybe this is why the divorce rate is what it is.
In fact the trend towards divorce has been trending down from the 70s numbers.
You can't take a years worth of marriages rate vs. the rate of divorces for same year, to arrive at that conclusion.
You've made that statement twice, both times it is an inaccurate statement.
I am not looking up the stats for this argument and will keep using them, thank you. I'm not looking them up because, frankly, even if the figures were forty/sixty it would not influence my opinions on this issue. Prenups are good.
Yeah, but here in the U.S.A., even if you do that, you are still not immune from the whole thing where the courts can still recognize an unmarried couple as being the equivalent of a "common-law marriage" (I believe that is the technical term for that). So not being married to someone (unfortunately) still isn't a foolproof defense to prevent them from being able to still legally take you to the cleaners...
I have heard this too, though I don't know the legalities of the issues one would face. However, I wouldn't share my household with someone I am not married to either (with the exception of dependent children of course).
Okay, point taken. Even so, I'd have to be extremely certain.
I like to think most people aren't schmucks being that I haven't run into too many in my lifetime. I just think some people take marriage too lightly, and believe a prenup is going to protect them. That isn't always the case so it's just better to be certain this is the person you want to share your heart and your money with.
If someone questions my character enough to ask me to sign a prenup, i'ts my opinion they are making a poor choice. You shouldn't have to question something like that in the person you want to spend your life with. Maybe this is why the divorce rate is what it is.
I could marry you feeling 100% confident I am making the right decision, and 100% confident you are fully committed. Then, three years later, something happens which rocks the boat, things degenerate. We seek counseling, work hard, try new things, but fail. Divorce is filed. Neither of us ever expected it to happen when we got engaged. We were certain without a doubt we would be fine. Yet, here we are divorced.
So both of us were fully committed, fully confident in our decision, without any fears or signs that we may be making a poor decision. Heck, maybe it wasn't a poor decision at the time. Yet, as circumstances happened, it didn't work out anyway.
There are no guarantees in life other than taxes and death.
I am not looking up the stats for this argument and will keep using them, thank you. I'm not looking them up because, frankly, even if the figures were forty/sixty it would not influence my opinions on this issue. Prenups are good.
Don't let the facts get in the way of good spin.
(PS, whether or not prenups are good has nothing to do with the stats. 5% of marriages could end in divorce and a prenup still makes reasonable insurance.)
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Don't let the facts get in the way of good spin. 
