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Old 08-28-2012, 09:55 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,682 posts, read 48,312,932 times
Reputation: 11862

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascension2012 View Post
Mac, its all excuses my man. There is nothing weird about apoproaching women in public. Just be freindly, flirtatious and unthreatening. THere is no need for small talk either, you can be perfectly honest and clear with your intentions, without being creepy. Just go over and introduce yourself, smile, look into her eyes. If you do it in an assertive and confident way, chances are they will be giving you their number before you even have to ask for it.
So what, next time I'm at the supermarket I should just randomly approach a chick, look her in the eyes, tell her how attractive she is, and hope she'll give me her number?

What I'll probably expect is a laugh, or a quizzical 'who the f**k is this guy?' look.
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Old 08-28-2012, 10:03 AM
 
5,476 posts, read 6,746,475 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
So what, next time I'm at the supermarket I should just randomly approach a chick, look her in the eyes, tell her how attractive she is, and hope she'll give me her number?

What I'll probably expect is a laugh, or a quizzical 'who the f**k is this guy?' look.
You should be outcome independent when approaching women, so it should make zero difference to you how she responds. If you really need to, have a positive frame of mind and think that her response wil;l be always to give you a phone number and show you interest. Dont randomly approach a chick, approach a chick that you find very attractive. Confidently walk up to her, get her attention, look into her eyes with a sly smile and say "I saw you shopping here, found you very attractive and wanted to come over and introduce myself, Im Mac....etc etc". After that it truly doesnt matter what you say, just stay in the frame of mind and display behavior thats congruent with your approach. You would be surprised. No matter what they tell you, women are dying to meet assertive and confident guys, who arent ashamed of finding women attractive. They are sick of wussies who approach talking about yogurt (lol) and puppies, and hoping this small talk turns into something more.
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Old 08-28-2012, 10:07 AM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,682 posts, read 48,312,932 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ascension2012 View Post
You should be outcome independent when approaching women, so it should make zero difference to you how she responds. If you really need to, have a positive frame of mind and think that her response wil;l be always to give you a phone number and show you interest. Dont randomly approach a chick, approach a chick that you find very attractive. Confidently walk up to her, get her attention, look into her eyes with a sly smile and say "I saw you shopping here, found you very attractive and wanted to come over and introduce myself, Im Mac....etc etc". After that it truly doesnt matter what you say, just stay in the frame of mind and display behavior thats congruent with your approach. You would be surprised.
Man I need to go out with you to see how you do it, I'm serious lol. I don't know how you look, and I'm not saying you're lying, but it just seems unrealistic for me at least to approach cold and tell some woman on the street 'I find you attractive blah blah'. Maybe if I drank a couple, I could do it, or if I was feeling particularly uninhibited.

You are right, though. Life is too short to let little things hold you back. Who cares, in the end, if she thinks you're a weirdo. If your self-esteem is immune to it and that's the worse that could happen it won't matter a bit. I wish our modern society wasn't so darn reserved, some people, especially younger women, act like you've violated their personal space if you say anything to them.
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Old 08-28-2012, 10:34 AM
 
Location: SF CA, USA
4,188 posts, read 4,611,112 times
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That's because young women have to be more cautious than their male counterparts. Generally speaking, the average physical difference between males and females and the prevalence of stalkers/rapists etcetera means that if someone talks to you on the subway or in the market and your a female, you have to be in defensive mode. A man less likely to have trouble if someone did try to invade your personal space. As a man the only times I feel unsafe are when I'm in some sort of seedy area, like walking home at night on the street or walking to a car in a dark lot. A woman, especially a young one, feels like that much more often, and for good reason.
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Old 08-28-2012, 10:53 AM
 
5,476 posts, read 6,746,475 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
Man I need to go out with you to see how you do it, I'm serious lol. I don't know how you look, and I'm not saying you're lying, but it just seems unrealistic for me at least to approach cold and tell some woman on the street 'I find you attractive blah blah'. Maybe if I drank a couple, I could do it, or if I was feeling particularly uninhibited.

You are right, though. Life is too short to let little things hold you back. Who cares, in the end, if she thinks you're a weirdo. If your self-esteem is immune to it and that's the worse that could happen it won't matter a bit. I wish our modern society wasn't so darn reserved, some people, especially younger women, act like you've violated their personal space if you say anything to them.
But if you drank a few, than you would be using booze as social lubricant, which many guys do and while it works, it does absolutely nothing for your game. Your self esteem should be based on only what you think of yourself, that why its called SELF esteem. Who cares if she thinks youre a weirdo and rejects you. If you never approached in the first place, you were already rejected. Women like assertive and direct guys. Cold approach during the day takes a little practice to get right, but it works like a charm, you would be surprised. Ive gotten in front of women who were about to walk past me as we were headed in opposite directions. Told them to turn their ipod off and then talked to them in a direct way. Got plenty of dates that way and plenty of good times otherwise. Be fearless, women will love you for it.
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Old 08-28-2012, 11:06 AM
 
11,832 posts, read 15,189,924 times
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I don't let my friends color my view of men.

My yogurt guy (yes, the guy who approached me over yogurt) has done very well for himself. Do what you are comfortable with; if you don't , you'll be even more awkward.
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Old 08-28-2012, 11:19 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
24,338 posts, read 26,236,145 times
Reputation: 54801
I mind my own business with regards to the gentlemen friends of my friends, unless there's something really really off about the guy (one specific boyfriend was a leech and an alcoholic, and I did express concern to a friend.) Ususally she'll describe the guy as some combination of Clooney and Jon Stewart, and when I meet him I think, "really? He's nice, and all, but still." If they're both twitterpated there's nothing to say about it.

Last edited by fleetiebelle; 08-28-2012 at 11:28 AM..
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Old 08-28-2012, 11:26 AM
 
Location: SF CA, USA
4,188 posts, read 4,611,112 times
Reputation: 4958
Twitterpated....good word. Ima have to use that.
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Old 08-28-2012, 12:00 PM
 
22,770 posts, read 27,514,764 times
Reputation: 14605
obligatory:

Female Friends Spend Raucous Night Validating The Living **** Out Of Each Other | The Onion - America's Finest News Source
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Old 08-28-2012, 06:29 PM
 
29,511 posts, read 36,040,228 times
Reputation: 39202
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
Man I need to go out with you to see how you do it, I'm serious lol. I don't know how you look, and I'm not saying you're lying, but it just seems unrealistic for me at least to approach cold and tell some woman on the street 'I find you attractive blah blah'. Maybe if I drank a couple, I could do it, or if I was feeling particularly uninhibited.

You are right, though. Life is too short to let little things hold you back. Who cares, in the end, if she thinks you're a weirdo. If your self-esteem is immune to it and that's the worse that could happen it won't matter a bit. I wish our modern society wasn't so darn reserved, some people, especially younger women, act like you've violated their personal space if you say anything to them.
Dude. You don't just go up to her and ask her out...you make "contact". Get her attention...give her yours. A smile, a little laugh and nod of the head...find something you can both smile at...like "man leave it to me to pick the line with the slow cashier..." stuff like that. I don't get why it's hard. Guys do this all day long. All the time.
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