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This weekend on Monday/Labor Day it will be my BDay September 3rd and I will be 25. Then about 2 weeks later on the 16th it will officially have been 1 year that my ex boyfriend and I have been broken up. Since our breakup he's bothered me on and off. Even though he's moved on living out his happily ever after. Speaking of which my mom keeps throwing around i.e. Teen Mom comparing that show to his lifestyle and just bringing him his name and stuff. So my ex has been tossed around a bit so he's been on my mind and I really miss him and miss being with him and wish him and I were still together but know that he's moved on and I don't want him back because the way he is now is not the way I like him to be.
What really is bothering me is that come my BDay or the anniversary is will my ex bother me? He tends to always hit me up at odd times and stuff so he may just strike those 2 days in particular. And yes I have blocked him non-stop, changed my number, but yet he still manages to find a way around it and get to me.
It just really hurts me how he was able to move on and get not 1 but 2 different girlfriends and is "in-love" with them and stuff. While me I have had no such luck with getting a new boyfriend and keep getting told by guys and girls am I bisexual or am I transgender etc.
Way back when I was on the dating scene I never had such a difficult time as I am now. To me it's like everything has gotten ten times worse since him and I broke up and since I lost my old high school friends everything in my life just keeps spiraling down and down and down.
I have been trying to forget about my ex and my old friends but it's hard. I don't have any other "real" friends to hang out with just internet friends hahaha. Don't get me wrong I have done on dates none worked out and keep trying to go out on dates and stuff but none work out.
I just wish my life was the way it was back when my ex and my old friends were in it because it seems it was a bit better then than what my life is currently.
This weekend on Monday/Labor Day it will be my BDay September 3rd and I will be 25. Then about 2 weeks later on the 16th it will officially have been 1 year that my ex boyfriend and I have been broken up. Since our breakup he's bothered me on and off. Even though he's moved on living out his happily ever after. Speaking of which my mom keeps throwing around i.e. Teen Mom comparing that show to his lifestyle and just bringing him his name and stuff. So my ex has been tossed around a bit so he's been on my mind and I really miss him and miss being with him and wish him and I were still together but know that he's moved on and I don't want him back because the way he is now is not the way I like him to be.
What really is bothering me is that come my BDay or the anniversary is will my ex bother me? He tends to always hit me up at odd times and stuff so he may just strike those 2 days in particular. And yes I have blocked him non-stop, changed my number, but yet he still manages to find a way around it and get to me.
It just really hurts me how he was able to move on and get not 1 but 2 different girlfriends and is "in-love" with them and stuff. While me I have had no such luck with getting a new boyfriend and keep getting told by guys and girls am I bisexual or am I transgender etc.
Way back when I was on the dating scene I never had such a difficult time as I am now. To me it's like everything has gotten ten times worse since him and I broke up and since I lost my old high school friends everything in my life just keeps spiraling down and down and down.
I have been trying to forget about my ex and my old friends but it's hard. I don't have any other "real" friends to hang out with just internet friends hahaha. Don't get me wrong I have done on dates none worked out and keep trying to go out on dates and stuff but none work out.
I just wish my life was the way it was back when my ex and my old friends were in it because it seems it was a bit better then than what my life is currently.
Let me offer a suggestion...
When he calls, start giggling and say, "Brad, stop (hee hee), I'm on the ph- BRAD! Don't put your hands there in public! (more giggling...)" And so on and so forth. He'll stop calling.
I feel for you, it appears you are still grieving a little bit.
You need to learn how to look forward in life. At the moment you are so busy looking behind you that you are stuck in the past.
If he's "moved on" to the point he's with someone else, tell him not to call you again, that is if he calls in the first place. Personally I doubt he will and you're worrying about nothing.
You need to start looking to your future, planning the next stage of your life, not endlessly ruminating over what has gone before.
It is imperative that you MOVE ON. It has been a year and he has been in 2 relationships. Move on. Do whatever you have to do to do that. A good candidate could be under your nose and you would have no clue for looking so far back into the past. Move on dear.
I'm sorry but obviously not enough. You need some tough love. Only you can tell yourself your worth. But I can guarantee you are better than you are allowing yourself to be now. Get it together doll. It's past time. I endured a heartbreaking split from a man I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with. We lived together for 3 years. I left him 6 months ago when I found out he cheated. It was rough but I pulled through. If I can do it you can too because I am no better than you. Even worse I had no family or friends to support me at the time for various reasons that I will not get into. So I LITERALLY had to pull myself up by my bootstraps on my own. Had to sleep on someone's couch for 4 months before finding my own place. The best thing you can ever do is live your life. Don't allow someone to live in your head when they are not paying rent to dwell there. I only share my story so that you know I can relate.
Last edited by FromTN2A2; 08-29-2012 at 07:35 PM..
napy666 - I'm sorry for your confusion and difficulty putting the past where it belongs, and moving on with your life.
This ex...since he has moved on, why is he still trying to make contact with you? Is he the type that thinks, 'I don't want her, but I don't want anyone else to have her.' I certainly hope he isn't...those are the types who enjoy stalking and they believe they own you. And with him still coming around...he basically does have a hold on you and is controlling your emotions and thinking.
When people break up; it's so easy to dwell on the 'good times' and ignore the negatives that caused the relationship to fail in the first place.
And it is hard when you don't have a social network to keep you busy so that you don't dwell on him, and so that you don't think about what 'was', or what 'might have been'.
Is there anyone you work with that perhaps you'd enjoy being with (as a friend)...lunch, or dinner, going shopping, etc.? Fostering new friendships is going to help you a lot as it will lead you on a better path.
As long as anyone continues to dwell on an impossible situation, the longer it will take to heal to move on.
It's odd, but my mom and dad got married on my mom's birthday and divorced on his. But he still calls her every year for her birthday.
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