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So, I seriously dated my ex for 16 months. We broke up a few years ago. We lived together for most of those 16 months so things did get more serious. She wanted more of a commitment from me at the time and I wasn't ready when she was. When I was starting to think maybe this is the one, she changed her attitude a bit...bad timing I suppose.
So, for a good 18 months I tried working things out with her. Every 3 months or so, we'd have dinner and catch up. I tried working things out up until June. I put myself up there emotionally like I never did before. She thought it over and decided it wasn't going to work out.
I accepted it and I've moved on even though I still like her. She called me a few weeks ago to ask me for some advice about a job placement test I took last year. I asked her how the test went, she said it went well. I told her, good and hope it goes well for you.
A few days later, she texts me what I'm doing Friday and Saturday. She ends up asking me if I want to see a concert with her in Vegas, just the two of us. I live in SoCal so Vegas is a 3 hour drive. Of course, this caught me off guard. I check out the concert ticket prices and they are way too expensive so that doesn't happen. I ask her what is she going to do if we don't do Vegas, she says she's doing some family stuff.
Then on Friday night, I'm pretty sure she drunk texts me some random stuff about the band we wanted to see. It didn't make sense. On Satuday night, she texts me "sometimes i wonder why you didnt see me in front of you"
I reply back, "I expressed myself before and you already made your decision"
She didn't reply after that. My good buddy thinks she was dating someone, that didn't work out so now shes lonely so she's coming to me for attention. I tend to agree with him but I'd like some outside opinions. I've always thought she was the one who got away but as more and more time passes, I think that less...thankfully.
My good buddy thinks she was dating someone, that didn't work out so now shes lonely so she's coming to me for attention.
Hate to point it out but you both did/are doing that. Or, more to the point, you both undervalued the other (which, sadly, is common). She may not ever forgive you for doing it to her first.
And I'm with them ^^. Even if she were up for a relationship, you wouldn't want to be with someone who flip-flops like this, and in a addition, doesn't seem to be a good, open communicator, would you?
It's more like, she can't be sure you're not going to flip flop again.
Or maybe she thinks you only came back to her because you couldn't find somebody better (what you really want). Doubt breeds doubt. Just like you're feeling doubt about her now.
You don't want to date someone on the rebound. I think you need to pass on this situation and move forward and find yourself a new girlfriend.
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