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Old 09-14-2012, 02:13 PM
 
9,229 posts, read 8,550,038 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss J 74 View Post
What do you guys say?
Actually, I met most of my dates, as a single woman, while I was busy doing things that interested me. I didn't spend a lot of time looking for dates. As for being hit on after getting into a relationship, maybe I was, but I would just bring up my BF in the conversation (later my DH), and then talk about something that interested me.

I don't waste a lot of time on things, or people, that do not interest me.
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Old 09-14-2012, 02:18 PM
 
1,304 posts, read 2,576,238 times
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I'll go with c) Females are jealous so they are attracted to taken men. It's not about confidence. There have been studies on this so more confidence is not the answer. The answer is the female realizes he must be a good catch if another woman caught him so he is elevated in her eyes.
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Old 09-14-2012, 06:21 PM
 
16,235 posts, read 25,217,748 times
Reputation: 27047
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss J 74 View Post
So we know the old Murphy's Law:

When you're single, it's almost as if no one pays any attention to you. But the minute you're in a relationship, all of a sudden people start hitting on you.

So the BF and I are having this happen to us, but we slightly disagree on WHY this happens.

His theory is that your attitude changes, you're more confident, even if slightly and people (or at least women) notice this.

My theory is you're no longer checking people out anymore, or at least as much as you used to, because you're in a relationship. So now you're going about your business, doing your own thing, and may seem more approachable as opposed to someone looking almost desperate.

While our theories are kind of on the same wavelength, because we agree it boils down to how you carry yourself while in a relationship vs single, he thinks the opposite sex can automatically sense when you're in a relationship, while I say no.

What do you guys say?
What debate. You both are actually saying the same thing, just using different words.
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Old 09-14-2012, 06:43 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,112 posts, read 30,628,399 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by capitol View Post
I'll go with c) Females are jealous so they are attracted to taken men. It's not about confidence. There have been studies on this so more confidence is not the answer. The answer is the female realizes he must be a good catch if another woman caught him so he is elevated in her eyes.
I was actually going to suggest this, but for men instead. Both men and women want what they can't have so it elevates attraction. It's not female specific.
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Old 09-14-2012, 07:33 PM
 
5,347 posts, read 7,199,924 times
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Many men can and have testified that the most attention they ever got from women was when they were in a relationship.Women love forbidden fruit, the guys who are taken are much more appealing than the guys who are clearly single for a reason. And I don't blame them

Last edited by BradPiff; 09-14-2012 at 07:56 PM..
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Old 09-14-2012, 07:49 PM
 
Location: TX
6,486 posts, read 6,388,858 times
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I'm not so convinced that this is a reality, that people hit on you more when you're in a relationship. So I can't comment on what causes it.
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Old 09-15-2012, 03:16 PM
 
1,304 posts, read 2,576,238 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
I was actually going to suggest this, but for men instead. Both men and women want what they can't have so it elevates attraction. It's not female specific.
Kinda true but it applies to women much more. If a man sees a fat girl with Brad Pitt, he's not going to be attracted to her even if Brad Pitt is dating her. But if you had the typical C-D nice guy who is unattractive to women and he is seen with Megan Fox, I guarantee he could get laid.
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Old 09-15-2012, 03:26 PM
 
264 posts, read 266,518 times
Reputation: 108
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miss J 74 View Post
So we know the old Murphy's Law:

When you're single, it's almost as if no one pays any attention to you. But the minute you're in a relationship, all of a sudden people start hitting on you.

So the BF and I are having this happen to us, but we slightly disagree on WHY this happens.

His theory is that your attitude changes, you're more confident, even if slightly and people (or at least women) notice this.

My theory is you're no longer checking people out anymore, or at least as much as you used to, because you're in a relationship. So now you're going about your business, doing your own thing, and may seem more approachable as opposed to someone looking almost desperate.

While our theories are kind of on the same wavelength, because we agree it boils down to how you carry yourself while in a relationship vs single, he thinks the opposite sex can automatically sense when you're in a relationship, while I say no.

What do you guys say?
This should be great advise to those seekingvrelatiinship: don't act desperate. It turns people off.
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Old 09-15-2012, 05:41 PM
 
17,869 posts, read 20,996,352 times
Reputation: 13949
Yep. When I was in a relationship I had women leap frogging to me, even a few lesbians were actually approaching me. I got out of a relationship, nothing. not even a smile or a hello from women.

I don't know if it's about my confidence level or not, but I Know I wasn't looking at women at all when I was investing my time in a woman.
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Old 09-15-2012, 05:50 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,651,238 times
Reputation: 11780
I'm married. I don't get flirted with or hit on.
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