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Old 09-23-2012, 03:11 PM
 
9,301 posts, read 8,323,252 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy74 View Post
It is quite interesting how the ugly guys are the harshest critics of how women look. Good looking men are generally nicer when talking about women. That could be why they are more successful with dating.
Funny, I've experienced a similar thing about women. I've noticed some of the "ugly" women are more cruel to me, and some of the better looking women are very kindhearted.

The same goes vice versa. It all depends on the person.

In my experience, beauty / ugliness truly is beneath the surface (for me).
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Old 09-23-2012, 03:20 PM
 
1,119 posts, read 1,368,397 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy74 View Post
It is quite interesting how the ugly guys are the harshest critics of how women look. Good looking men are generally nicer when talking about women. That could be why they are more successful with dating.
agree.
To the OP, if you have a job that pays only 300 a week, maybe you should invest some time developing your career or maybe going back to school.

Your post is somehow demeaning to women, and then you wonder why you are alone. Well may be it is your attitude. If you feel like you deserve a super model, well, ummm
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Old 09-23-2012, 03:23 PM
 
499 posts, read 755,604 times
Reputation: 551
Quote:
Originally Posted by TJenkins602 View Post
Funny, I've experienced a similar thing about women. I've noticed some of the "ugly" women are more cruel to me, and some of the better looking women are very kindhearted.

The same goes vice versa. It all depends on the person.

In my experience, beauty / ugliness truly is beneath the surface (for me).
+1 I'm not super short, but when I go out, it was always the ugliest, fattest women who would call me out on it, most of the time without me even bothering or striking up a conversation with them. (fat women aren't my cup of tea, but I'm never mean and talk to just about anyone when I go out just to converse and be friendly)

Not to mention my most overweight friends would only pursue skinny tall guys (usually with some bad boy appeal) and then get seriously angry if they were turned down for being fat. I'd say, "why don't you give some fat guys a chance", the type of guys (sometimes just chubby) that would talk to them. Then there were the nice guys and not so bad boys, they (the ugly, fattest women) would always turn them down.

I'd always say to them, "look in the mirror, you can't be upset that you turn down all types of guys and you're not 10s yourselves". To which they'd reply, "I can't do fat/short/boring, etc guys".
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Old 09-23-2012, 03:29 PM
 
4,176 posts, read 6,321,819 times
Reputation: 1874
Quote:
Originally Posted by DavieJ89 View Post
So as you guys all know, I'm not really an attractive guy and I've had some HORRIBLE luck in the dating world. It seems like every woman I meet who I'm attracted to either has a boyfriend, doesn't find me attractive, or I don't have enough money to "take care of" them.

All my life I've had countless females who HAVE been attracted to me, but I didn't feel the same. Said females are usually overweight, ugly, or a combination of the 2 (usually a combination)

People have always told me to just "take what you can get, because it won't get any better" I'm seriously considering doing just that. Should I just settle for the women who do like me? I feel like actually trying to get a woman I find attractive is too far gone and that nothing I do will ever change my attractiveness to women. I don't have money, good looks, a nice car, good credit, or a good paying job (I DO have a job, but it doesn't pay any more than $300 on a good week)
By starting this thread (and the one about your appearance), you're telling others that you're insecure and not comfortable in your own skin. The best remedy in this situation is to work on yourself. This would involve better health/fitness/appearance (weight loss, lifting weights, better wardrobe, etc.). Career wise, think of what you can do to better yourself, be it trade school, internships, networking more aggressively, etc.

The best advice I can give you is focus on yourself. Once you're at your best or moving in the right direction, you'll be more confident and more successful with the ladies than you are now.
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Old 09-23-2012, 03:34 PM
 
499 posts, read 755,604 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LIS123 View Post
The best advice I can give you is focus on yourself. Once you're at your best or moving in the right direction, you'll be more confident and more successful with the ladies than you are now.
Best advice so far. If you're into what you're doing and love yourself, you won't really care what other people think. Not saying to be cocky, but be the one they want to come to and don't make your feeling of completion revolve around finding a woman. You want to have the attitude that if a woman rejects you or isn't interested that THEY lost out on a really good guy.
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Old 09-23-2012, 04:20 PM
 
Location: Australia
4,001 posts, read 6,259,757 times
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God, how ugly ARE you?

I went walking about the city the other day and you know what, most people don't look like they walked off the pages of a magazine.

There's all sorts but most would veer towards the less good looking, over all. Young, old, female, male, whatever. Most people are pretty average.

If you can't find some woman in all that mass of humanity that you personally find attractive, that feels the same way about you, then you are doing something wrong. Statistically there has to be someone. Stop hanging out in hipster places drooling over all the glamour and just hang out in ordinary places with ordinary people. They're everywhere...and they date.
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Old 09-23-2012, 05:13 PM
 
28,896 posts, read 54,042,483 times
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I think a better strategy is for an unsuccessful guy to examine WHY he is an unsuccessful dater.
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Old 09-23-2012, 05:30 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,711 posts, read 11,712,820 times
Reputation: 7604
Quote:
Originally Posted by DavieJ89 View Post
So as you guys all know, I'm not really an attractive guy and I've had some HORRIBLE luck in the dating world. It seems like every woman I meet who I'm attracted to either has a boyfriend, doesn't find me attractive, or I don't have enough money to "take care of" them.

All my life I've had countless females who HAVE been attracted to me, but I didn't feel the same. Said females are usually overweight, ugly, or a combination of the 2 (usually a combination)

People have always told me to just "take what you can get, because it won't get any better" I'm seriously considering doing just that. Should I just settle for the women who do like me? I feel like actually trying to get a woman I find attractive is too far gone and that nothing I do will ever change my attractiveness to women. I don't have money, good looks, a nice car, good credit, or a good paying job (I DO have a job, but it doesn't pay any more than $300 on a good week)

some guy I considered a so called friend told me once: if you have this much trouble dating, put yourself in the 'bargain bin' and pray some guy becomes interested....

I never signed up for that mentality. I don't think you should just throw yourself at the mercy of any woman.

IMO, you have to make a choice 1 out of 3: would you rather do the above or would you rather decide to 'lower your standards a bit' and try those women? The third option is the one I take and that's just to forget the idea altogether. I don't know how old you are but if you are like me in your 30s or 40s and still having these issues, I'm sorry the ship has sailed and you're left with very few options at this point.
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Old 09-23-2012, 05:48 PM
 
137 posts, read 192,303 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doll Eyes View Post
some guy I considered a so called friend told me once: if you have this much trouble dating, put yourself in the 'bargain bin' and pray some guy becomes interested....

I never signed up for that mentality. I don't think you should just throw yourself at the mercy of any woman.

IMO, you have to make a choice 1 out of 3: would you rather do the above or would you rather decide to 'lower your standards a bit' and try those women? The third option is the one I take and that's just to forget the idea altogether. I don't know how old you are but if you are like me in your 30s or 40s and still having these issues, I'm sorry the ship has sailed and you're left with very few options at this point.
It's different with guys than girls. A girl in her late 30s or 40s has to take what she can get. Guys have a longer shelf life.

OP, yes, making $300 a week is lame. I wouldn't be able to live off of that personally. And you also said you're not good looking, which is fine. Luckily for you, neither of these things factor in much when dating.

If you're THAT unsuccessful, it's because of some behavior that you have that turns women off or because you lack confidence or have a negative attitude and are projecting those things.

How many approaches have you made in the last year? In your lifetime? Do you have a social circle? Do you work with women?

These questions are very important. If you're not meeting many women, then that might very well be your issue.
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Old 09-23-2012, 05:53 PM
 
Location: Bronx
16,200 posts, read 22,984,060 times
Reputation: 8345
Quote:
Originally Posted by DavieJ89 View Post
So as you guys all know, I'm not really an attractive guy and I've had some HORRIBLE luck in the dating world. It seems like every woman I meet who I'm attracted to either has a boyfriend, doesn't find me attractive, or I don't have enough money to "take care of" them.

All my life I've had countless females who HAVE been attracted to me, but I didn't feel the same. Said females are usually overweight, ugly, or a combination of the 2 (usually a combination)

People have always told me to just "take what you can get, because it won't get any better" I'm seriously considering doing just that. Should I just settle for the women who do like me? I feel like actually trying to get a woman I find attractive is too far gone and that nothing I do will ever change my attractiveness to women. I don't have money, good looks, a nice car, good credit, or a good paying job (I DO have a job, but it doesn't pay any more than $300 on a good week)
What can I say? For starters try to slightly alter your persona. Change your viewpoint on the world. Yes these days women are often choosey and it might get worse or maybe better, but I dont know what the future holds in the dating department of this great nation of ours. You need to improve your attitude, self esteem and self worth. Try to better yourself, build up your income, try to slightly improve your physique. I'm not that great with women either but I do manage to get by with them, I jsut dont like women with baggage which are attracted to me. Try not to settle for less unless it becomes your last resort especially when your still young but only when your older. Try to find a job that pays 500-600 bucks a week too. If a girl is not into you just move on and be like next, thats what I do, she lost out on a good guy who has alot of good going on for himself.
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