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How to trust your own judgment or feelings about a situation again? How I do it is to stop listening to other peoples' advice (although this is hard-especially if you're the think out loud-share-with-me type).
Basically, keep your questions to yourself and learn to listen to yourself more.
Friends and family want to help, but outside opinion can convolute your thinking, especially because you're in your own situation so you know it best. At times, having a very empathic friend is helpful, because they get you to see patterns of behavior about yourself you don't quite notice because they are the outsider looking in. Beneficial to have an objective opinion. But trust yourself most, firstly.
Meeting new people so quickly means you're trying to hide your pain. I've done this before, and it's never gone well for me. I have hurt some people, and people have hurt me. At the end of the day, if you're harboring bad feelings and mistrust, you aren't doing that new person in your life any favors. I'm a naturally distrustful person myself, so I get it. I've probably had more gold diggers come and leave my life than have fingers and toes. Really negativity begets negativity, and it's an endless cycle. That is why you have to get to know yourself and rebuild your confidence before you get on the horse again. While I've had a tons of sexual relationships since my last real relationship (it's been since 2006), I haven't gotten close to someone in a long time. It's because I never took out any time for myself to put things in perspective. I'm slowly airing out that negativity, but being a serial dater and promiscious have forced me to build up a lot of negativity. I'm trying to get rid of it, one day at a time with positive thinking.
i dont think i would have ever stopped trusting my own judgment. i cant control other people or read their minds. the best i can do is trust people are who they claim to be and not place personal blame on myself if they turn out to be the opposite of who they claimed.
what is important is you take you experience from you last relationship to the next and do not allow yourself to repeat your past mistakes. do this and you will never have to worry what "you did" to make things bad. your better judgment will already be telling you before you get there that your are entering into something that may be a very bad situation.
I know this sounds familar but time is about the only thing. Time for yourself to heal, time to learn to trust, etc. It's not an easy thing the most important thing to remember is don't rush take as much time as you feel that you need.
Thats the toughest thing to do trust me I'm going though that now.
When a relationship ends because of a betrayal, how do you trust your own judgement again? Some people move on quickly and just meet someone else.
Let me ask you this...was there, at any time in the relationship, you had this little gut-voice that was giving you signals something was off and you weren't listening to it? Those instincts are rarely wrong and we are at fault - everyone - for not listening to them and realize they were right when it is too late.
Keep in mind as well, every person you know or date is different and has different priorities, maturity levels and needs and wants. Just because this one didn't work out for that reason doesn't mean they all will.
In situations like these, it's always a good idea to re-evaluate your selection process. I blame myself for being in a crappy situtation due to flaws in my selection process and needed to make adjustments. I believe everyone comes into your life for a reason, not necessarily the reason you intended and each teaches you something about yourself and you learn and grow from that. Rejection of any kind is part of that growth experience - even though it does really suck and is hard on the self esteem at first. They are the necessary evils of life.
That's a really good point. A relationship that ends badly is always a good opportunity for learning about one's self.
Absolutely. Think of your brain & conscious as a computer chip that has been installed with a new program to recognize & clean a 'virus' that recently attacked your computer. Next time you will be more alert to any red flags as you have subconsciously learnt from your bad experience. You dont need to analyze the breakup or stress on what you should learn from it. The learning has already been done when you were going through the experience. You are a smarter person now as you have learnt something new about life & relationships. But some people come out of these experiences with bitterness & anger that reflects on their future relationships. Stay positive & dont change for the worse. See your past disappointments as teaching tools that would help you find your future partner & appreciate them more.
I read this somewhere: Many people think that the movie godfather 2 was better than the first movie but unless you have seen the first movie completely, you wont be able to understand or appreciate the sequel.
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