WOMEN!!!!.....What do you want? (beautiful, meaning, personal, people)

[Picassine]

Originally Posted by Mr88

I've heard it, seen it, been told of it and been in that situation where a guy tries everything to get that one girl to even look his direction, and she just blows him off.

Now this, is not about those creepy guys who use "LINES" to get a woman to have sex with them, but about this, is about those sincere guys who try very hard to impress the girl he thinks he compliments and she just hold up her nose and continues without the slightest whiff of the guy.

Also another thing that gets on my nerves are women who have a completely good thing and then mess it up to see what else the world has to offer.

Women who cry when they get hurt by the guy who has 100 girlfriends, but laughs at the guy who's trying to make her his own.......

Help me understand that minute subject about the bigger picture of women.

What do YOU really want?

The girl is just not that into you... period... forget about her and move on...

It doesn't mean that if a guy compliments a girl that she should date him...
Maybe they perceive you as too clingy or somehow 'desperate'

[JerZ]

Originally Posted by Mr88

Are you saying that the couples who are "happy" don't really mind how their loved one looks? Cos I don't believe that.

Absolutely not. I'm saying that if men are going to fault women for blowing them off for one "superficial" reason, then they need to fault themselves as well for their "superficial" reason...be it looks, money or what-have-you.

Women are being cast as these terrible people for wanting something the man doesn't have, but when the man wants something the woman doesn't have (as in your cited example: looks), he's "just a good honest guy looking for someone to love and understand him! Oh, and be hot. Is that so much to ask?" (not a direct quote) No, it's not. It's not too much for a man to ask...and it's not so much for a woman to ask, either.

[nebulous1]

I think we all want someone who is very hot, intelligent, compassionate, and special, but doesn't know that about themselves...not low self-esteem, but someone who is not full of themselves. Someone sane.

[Sunnydee]

I don't know what all women want, but I want a nice, honest guy who treats me with respect, values my intellect, appreciates me for who I am - flaws and all, and makes me laugh.

[overtaxedunderpaided]

Originally Posted by Mexi-in-Arlington-Heights

When it comes to dating a girl I don't really mind how she looks like. I want a girl who feels comfortable about herself and won't let her physical appearance bring her down to stopping her from being social. I have dated chubby rocks to a girl who looked like a victoria secret model(how I got her I don't know).
About the last comment. It's true. I can't bring myself to dating a girl that is too black or too brown. It's nothing racist really as I don't believe myself superior to them. It's just not my type of physical beauty.

Is it just me?!..............or does this sound racist.................what does the colour of someones skin got to do with real person?!.............think your wiping out a whole lot of people for no good reason...........not that i truly care or tryin to change your mind.........in fact your probably doin them a favour....

....and as far as the other comment about not caring what your loved one looks like.............yes i want them to look as best as they can.............but lets face it.....times a catchin up......for those of us in the older spectrum?!......

............got asked this...........no, i dont give a flyin F if you go bald, grow a potbelly, hair grows where it never grew before and your teeth are fallin out..............lol.............i love this person with all my heart............the superfical trappings of youth no longer concern you..............i guess you have to learn at your own pace?................love is love...............there are no "conditions"

[MainStreet]

My BFF met her man on line. They found each other playing ucher on line for a couple years...which led to phone calls. I don't know how many years later it was before they finally met. But, by then they were so madly in love that it didn't matter what the other looked like. Brought him all the way across the country to her. They will be celebrating their 10 year anniversary (since they first played ucher) in a few months. He's a fantastic man and she is the greatest soul, the humor of both are like a B12 vitamin shot for me.

My point, they've both been heavy, thin, somewhere in the middle, but their love is written all over them.

[cremebrulee]

hmmmmmm
ya mean right now?

[GoddessofRandomThoughts]

Originally Posted by JerZ

I was JUST going to post that.

OP, what are these women who are snubbing you like?

(ETA: Just so the OP knows...the following isn't based just on his post. It's more about the ensuing posts identifying women as wanting incredibly unobtainable things in a mate, and other statements made on this thread. When I am speaking to the OP, I note it here because this post ended up seriously long and a little confusing and like I was blasting the OP.)

I hate to say this, but maybe the attraction isn't there. I see people on here posting all the inner qualities they want in a mate, but let's be honest. I'm a woman but I'd ask the men here who are complaining: Tell me HONESTLY that you've never known a woman who was sweet, generous, funny, ready for a relationship...but, well...you know...on the heavy side. Or who was intelligent, loved animals and had a penchant for action movies but, you know...why oh why couldn't she have been pretty too...Now turn that around. "He has all these great qualities but, you know, he's bald..." What makes *her* thought shallow but yours a sweet dream from a good, old honest guy? Think about it.

Do you realize how unbelievably passed-up we women feel (well, not me now...I'm out of the market, LOL) when we KNOW that you're sizing us up and thinking, "Oh, she has 900 great qualities but I REALLY dig big Angelina Jolie lips"? I had one guy tell me I was exactly what he'd want in a woman if only I didn't have glasses. He said he had his future children to consider and he'd feel irresponsible passing on the genetics for faulty eyes to them. At least he was honest.

I don't want to be shallow. But you know and I know and everyone here knows that there are TONS of women out there who have great inner qualities, and very, very few movie stars. Many of you--I'd place money on it--are passing these women up right, left and center. Because please. They're out there. They're waiting for a soul mate, just like you. If you really wanted a woman just for intelligence and humor you'd have a woman by now. You'd have ten. Perhaps you, too, have great inner qualities but are not Dr. McDreamy in the looks department...and women are passing you up for reasons that are no more shallow than a man's reasons for passing up, for instance, the above example of an overweight woman, or one with glasses. Bottom line: perhaps the women you're pursuing are the wrong women. They're snobby. Why? All women aren't snobby. Really think about the kind of women you're approaching.

You should check out the Los Angeles board. There is a critique of women not only by state but by city, along with corresponding numbers (L.A. has mostly 8s, Milan has 9s, Seattle is 6s or what-have-you). And for handy reference, each poster there is listing which movie star's qualities his future mate must have, but they're VERY generous..."I go for the Julia Roberts type, but the woman doesn't have to be *skinny*...but she should be thin...just not scrawny...but not heavy...she should be fit," etc. Oh well thank GOD for flexibility. (rolling eyes) Is the eventually chosen women supposed to be thankful for having been given a pass or something? The man who posted that particular thread posted an identical copy-and-paste question to all of California's other counties. He apparently is basing his future move and the future of his entire life on how good-looking the women are. The generous part of me wants to say, "Well, he's not the norm." Except that so many men have responded, echoing and encouraging him and giving handy tips! (ETA: The sentence about Julia Roberts was my own example...I don't remember if Julia in particular was mentioned...I was paraphrasing. Just didn't want to put words into somebody's mouth.)

It's a little bit sickening...and very telling. I'm not saying that's the OP. Actually, it sounds pretty far from the OP...he sounds sincere. BUT be flat-out honest with yourself and if you can honestly say you haven't been passing up girls who are a little heavy, or a little short, or a little this or a little that or who don't seem "sexy enough" or whatever, then you really can't fault the girls you're seeking out for also having demands that you don't feel you can fulfill. It's the same for both sexes. If you're unsure whether or not you're prejudging women on something as much as women may be prejudging you, do a little test: think back to the last time you were on a matchmaking site. Which did you look at first: the text or the pictures? How about in the classifieds. Did your eyes zero in first on her age and her weight?

Women are *not* all seeking a rich guy and yadda yadda (I don't even remember all the ridiculous assumptions that were made on this thread thus far). Probably they're EXACTLY like you: they want great inner qualities...and an attraction that is at least partially physical. At least think about whether or not you yourselves do this before condemning the entire female sex as shallow and unpleasable.

OMG!! JerZ you are my new hero!!! Preach on!!


So all I can add to that is hey we all do it (judge by somewhat superficial standards). THe thing is to be honest with yourself. Admit you do it and maybe ease up a bit. Know that others judge somewhat superficially and take a good honest look at yourself. (The Goddess, who is single and out there looking, is a BBW herself and knows that sometimes that puts some men off. Hey, whadaya gonna do???)

Now that shouldn't keep you from going for it if you see someone you are interested in but know that most of us have more misses than hits. It's hard not to take it personally but try.

And remember the other person doesn't know what a good thing they let slip by!!
Much love, the Goddess

[aleecya]

What do YOU really want?[/quote]
We want a guy who is patient,perceptive,humble,kind,generous,motivated, loving,understanding,and
god-fearing

If a guy has all of these things within his personality no woman would ever pass him by

[Mr88]

Originally Posted by cremebrulee

hmmmmmm
ya mean right now?

Yeah...why not....just HUMOR ME!