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Almost all of them. Otherwise, they probably wouldn't be friends with me.
God ... even as negative as I am, I know you are DEAD wrong on that. The majority, maybe. Almost all. No way. If I thought that were true, I'd kill myself today. I really would.
I'm not sure I'm understanding you here. Your OP was about how some can be so quick to reject. When the comment was made that most (NOT ALL) women know within 5 minutes whether they want to sleep with you or not, you say that all of your female friends would disagree, otherwise they probably wouldn't be friends with you. ?????? Are you saying they are only friends with you because they might want to sleep with you? Or are you saying they haven't rejected you yet and so they are still friends with you?
Seriously you shouldn't talk about killing yourself (even joking) because of other people's attractions. That's just horribly maligned thinking.
Too many people these days approach relationships with an all or nothing attitude. If one approaches others with an attitude of 'I want something from you' then they are doomed to failure. Take some time to get to know a woman before you even think about sleeping with her or entering into a relationship. AND NEVER base your self esteem on how many, or how few, women want to go to bed with you. You'll make yourself miserable.
Because even if she would, I would not want to date someone who decides if they are going to enter a relationship with a man after 5 minutes of meeting him.
Uh, nobody really decides that. They just know if he doesn't make the cut and never will. I don't see anything wrong with that. I want a future girlfriend/wife to have found me good looking from the start. I don't want my looks to have "grown on her".
I'm not sure I'm understanding you here. Your OP was about how some can be so quick to reject. When the comment was made that most (NOT ALL) women know within 5 minutes whether they want to sleep with you or not, you say that all of your female friends would disagree, otherwise they probably wouldn't be friends with you. ?????? Are you saying they are only friends with you because they might want to sleep with you? Or are you saying they haven't rejected you yet and so they are still friends with you?
Maybe you're right. Maybe some do impose the 5 minute rule. But I know one for sure does not. And I know my ex does not either.
The comment was made more in the sense that if they were a '5 minute gal' they probably wouldn't associate in a social sense with a guy like me who is unattractive to them.
Maybe you're right. Maybe some do impose the 5 minute rule. But I know one for sure does not. And I know my ex does not either.
The comment was made more in the sense that if they were a '5 minute gal' they probably wouldn't associate in a social sense with a guy like me who is unattractive to them.
jobaba, sometimes you're too hard on yourself and (forgive me) a little dismissive of the ladies.
I'm sure that you could admit that you know fairly quickly if you find a woman physically attractive? It doesn't mean you WILL sleep with her, just that you WOULD. I'm friends with many ladies, and it's not because they hope to sleep with me some day. It's because we're FRIENDS. Remember, people are more than just looks. When you do enter into a deep relationship, that person becomes the epitome of desire. You don't see flaws, only a grace in them. It's rather obvious that you've been hurt, and I'm sorry about that, but life will always have unmet desires, and joyous surprises. There actually may be a few women out there that considered you relationship material, yet you may have ruled them out. It's just how things work sometimes.
I think you are gender confused my friend. It seems to me that you are expecting women to use logic when it comes to attraction to the opposite sex. You are probably doing so, because we men try to apply logic to everything, but in matters of the heart and from womans point of view, it rarely has nything to do with the outcome. Sure, on some occasions a woman may use logic and think, im not physicaly attracted to this guy, so i wont bother, or he isnt my type etc etc. But more often than not, women react to how YOU make them feel. How you behave around them, how you carry yourself and what type of man you are demonstrating to be. Much of this happens at the subconscious level and logic has nothing to do with it. How very often you see a girl who says, I like tall, blonde, mascular guys with blue eyes, but 30 minutes goes home with a short, skinny dark haired dude, who just swept her off her feet with charm, and wit? Logic does not apply in this scnenario, and trying to logicaly resolve it, is a waste of time.
I'm assuming with your last example you are talking about the bar scene where people are drinking. And the next day they wake up with regrets.
I'm thinking OP is looking to cultivate something more long lasting that a hookup that takes 30 minutes.
Getting a woman to look past issues of initial attraction typically takes more than one night at the bar.
jobaba, sometimes you're too hard on yourself and (forgive me) a little dismissive of the ladies.
I'm sure that you could admit that you know fairly quickly if you find a woman physically attractive? It doesn't mean you WILL sleep with her, just that you WOULD. I'm friends with many ladies, and it's not because they hope to sleep with me some day. It's because we're FRIENDS. Remember, people are more than just looks. When you do enter into a deep relationship, that person becomes the epitome of desire. You don't see flaws, only a grace in them. It's rather obvious that you've been hurt, and I'm sorry about that, but life will always have unmet desires, and joyous surprises. There actually may be a few women out there that considered you relationship material, yet you may have ruled them out. It's just how things work sometimes.
There's women who I find immediately hot, cute, kinda cute, there's women who are OK, so-so, and then there's women who are unattractive.
But none of that means that I will or will not enter into a relationship with any of them.
It takes me more than 5 minutes to order dinner at a nice restaurant sometimes...
How could you believe THAT and then preach that looks don't matter for guys to get gals.
That makes no sense.
Because they dont. Think about it this way. When you meet or approach a woman you are attracted to, you haave five minutes to demonstrate masculine traits which most women find very attractive. Show that you are confident, assertive, positive, relaxed, sexual, direct, aggressive, charming, witty etc etc. If you are able to demonstrate some of these traits, most will put you in "could possibly sleep with" column, and if you good at it, they will not only give you their ophone number without you asking, some will ask where you live, as it has happened to me so often. Be a man, it is all it takes.
I'm assuming with your last example you are talking about the bar scene where people are drinking. And the next day they wake up with regrets.
I'm thinking OP is looking to cultivate something more long lasting that a hookup that takes 30 minutes.
Getting a woman to look past issues of initial attraction typically takes more than one night at the bar.
Its just an example, where it takes place it doesnt really matter. I dont know what the OP is trying to cultivate, im just trying to illustratre to him that logic doesnt always apply in matters of heart. Also, a 30 minute hook up can lead to great sex as well as something more down the road.
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