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i have posted a couple of threads before this about the same situation..feel free to read.. lol..but my recent dilemma..is here...
:ambivalence:
This guy friend of mine ...who i assumed has liked me for a long time now.. did ask me out quite a few times in the last year or so... we've met up in a group before..but it wasn't long before he asked to see just me and chill out in only my company..anyway..i shouldn't even admit to this..but i didn't react perhaps how he would want... i didn't exactly say no but i wasn't particularly enthusiastic either...:ambivalence:.that was mostly because it was a really busy time in my life i didn't have time to think about going out with him..
he did make it clear he wanted a relationship...
so anyway..he did eventually stop asking to see me..fair enough i guess..i'd say he stopped asking now about a few months ago...
now... a few months later...a lot of my close friends just said to me that i should just hang out with him as a mate..or see what happens..and that nothing serious has to happen now..i guess they thought he must have liked me a lot because he's still around after all this time and has actually had different girls/women after him but he kept on continuously telling me hes not interested in any of them..they're not his type ..etc etc..
therefore what i did a day ago now is... message him saying.."hi whats up?.. i was just thinking recently..that we could chill out sometime and do something.."..but he hasn't replied or called or anything..and usually he doesn't take this long to respond to something i've said..
so i don't know why he's not... has he lost interest now all of a sudden..(after a couple of years)..
is he just confused and shocked (because this is not like my usual aloof and distant self)..this is the most forward i've ever been... or what... :ambivalence::ambivalence:
my guess would have been that he would have been happy that i've finally given him something positive back..but instead...i get nothing..
u rejected him and u think he'll just come back and want to date u? most guys would take that as being a second option
i didn't really reject him..rejection in my opinion would be a NO I DONT THINK SO..or NO GO AWAY..lol
i acknowledged what he was saying but didn't force the issue...
for example he said lets go to the cinema...i said yes that would be kool.but i didnt really say ok lets go tomorrow..and set a date or time...that should be up to him surely because he's the one who asked
like i went along with what he was saying..but then he never got around to being specific...
i have posted a couple of threads before this about the same situation..feel free to read.. lol..but my recent dilemma..is here...
my guess would have been that he would have been happy that i've finally given him something positive back..but instead...i get nothing..
That sounds like a rather conceited statement.
I see this time and time again; someone is interested in the other person, other person strings them a long with commiting or rejects them. When the interested person moves on suddenly the chased person wants them back again. It's actually a sick psychological pattern that psychologists recognise.
He's just not that into you. WHy do you do what your close friends tell you to?
it appeared that he was..
i know for a fact when someone likes me...in fact if he hadn't asked me..all the other occasions to meet up with him before..i wouldnt have asked to finally hang out with him now
i took his interest before ..and the fact that he asked to meet me many a time as clear interest
This is what happens when you are "too busy" for someone.
I've been on the losing end of that situation before and sooner or later you come to the realization that if the target of your interest really wanted to spend time with you they'd make time some way or another.
Being put on the back burner or being strung along is no fun and I can almost guarantee that he probably felt that way.
If it was me I'd probably tell you to "Go f*#k yourself' in all honesty. Maybe he's biting his tongue.
Well, Candy, from your OP it seems to me that you didnt really share his enthusiasm and he properly perceived it as you not being interested. Perhaps if you reacted differently, he would have given you something specific or directly asked you out. PWe dont know this guy and have no idea why he wouldnt repsond but we can assume that he thought you werent interested and moved on. Maybe he found someone else or perhaps he isnt willing to invest emotions into someone who has turned him down in the past, which would be very prudent on his part. Guys dont like to be put on the backburner, until the girls freinds talk her into initiating contact or all the other options fail and the girl is unto plan F. We all want to be someones priority.
i didn't really reject him..rejection in my opinion would be a NO I DONT THINK SO..or NO GO AWAY..lol
i acknowledged what he was saying but didn't force the issue...
for example he said lets go to the cinema...i said yes that would be kool.but i didnt really say ok lets go tomorrow..and set a date or time...that should be up to him surely because he's the one who asked
like i went along with what he was saying..but then he never got around to being specific...
anything other then yes, guys will think is a rejection
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