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So you were one of those guys who chased after the same girl again and again even when she'd rejected you and constantly moaned that "nice guys always come last"? Yes, I think you did the right thing in changing
Is it the stereotype that girls date guys they don't find attractive? That isn't true for me or any of my friends Guys, don't believe that.
OP, why would you "hook on like a barnacle" to a woman who isn't into you from the outset? That's not normal. I'm glad you figured this out, but I can't help wonder about the psychology of someone who would do that. Of course the issue has nothing to do with being a nice guy. It has everything to do with being driven to go after people who have no interest in you.
I was self-criticizing my own behavior. I had this hope that I could win them over, an overly idealistic romantic fantasy.
Nothing wrong with being a nice guy. Just have to remember that women respond to men who are confident. Needy guys that exude shyness and timidness always end up being looked over.
I would work on your physical side a little more. Drop a few pounds. Buy some new wardrobe. Get out of the house a little more and find some activities where you will have the opportunity to chat with a few females. Don't worry about generating a relationship. Just work on being comfortable conversating with different women.
The less pressure you put on yourself the easier things will be.
Same problem here. But I never dote or cling. I just treat women with respect which surprisingly is just as deadly early on while dating/flirting as being nice. Seems girls like to be treated like crap initially which is extremely uncomfortable for me to do. I just don't get it. I mean, I don't like being treated like crap. I have heard many theories for this mostly centering on a challenge and stuff like it creates an air of indepedence that makes them feel more valuable.
women can put men on a pedestal but never the other way around unfortuneately
Unsure how that's unfortunate considering all the guys lamenting about how gals are on a pedestal and the amount of guys thinking they are the ultimate prize and deserve the most attractive gal (yet it's gals who are mainly called self-entitled princess with unrealistic demands).
I'd think it would be fortunate to guys that 'women can put men on a pedestal but never the other way around'.
"I*no longer feel doomed to fall in love with unattainable, popular, supermodel-hot girls and I feel ready to hope for something more realistic and hopefully, someone that is actually more compatible with me and not someone who I project a false, perfect image of that is unlike their real self."
Here is the meat. He was trying to date outside of his league, wanting to date a hot girl despite being a fat average joe. He blamed rejection on him being too "nice" but the reality is, he was over-reaching. As it is.for moet complainers, the Nice Guy fallacy is a cover up for thinking you deserve better than what is realistic.
Hats off to him for getting past this.
Where was he going to meet all these supermodels and what did he think was going to happen?
Where was he going to meet all these supermodels and what did he think was going to happen?
I'm still trying to figure out why the OP thought that having unrealistic expectations has anything to do with being a nice guy.
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