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I have a good friend who is attractive, smart and eminently dateable. But she hasn't had a relationship in a few years, principally because she wants one really badly. And I mean REALLY badly. She is constantly on dating sites, when we go out she obsesses over every waiter, bartender and passer by, thinking that he might be "the one." This, of course, puts any normal person off.
There isn't anything wrong with her except that she smacks of desperation for a relationship and thinks about it morning, noon and night. In fact, if she does get into one, I don't know how she will occupy her brain as the major thrust of her thinking will have to redirect. Predictably, she attracts men who have no interest in moving so quickly and is often thwarted in her quest for love. EVERYONE has told her to calm down and let it happen, but she can't seem to process that.
Do you know anyone like this? What advice would you give?
I know of a guy who's like this, he obsesses badly over it, and I frequently tell him the biggest reason why he can't get dates is because he's so obsessed with the idea of being in a relationship. I frequently tell him to stop thinking of every woman who passes by and tell him to concentrate on himself and stop obsessing because it's something you can't really force.
I know of a guy who's like this, he obsesses badly over it, and I frequently tell him the biggest reason why he can't get dates is because he's so obsessed with the idea of being in a relationship. I frequently tell him to stop thinking of every woman who passes by and tell him to concentrate on himself and stop obsessing because it's something you can't really force.
You mean, besides updating her many profiles on dating sites, Facebook, etc.? Not really anymore. We used to go out and do cultural things we both enjoyed-- ballet, symphony, plays. Now she only wants to do that if there might be a good "candidate pool" (as she calls it.) I don't hang out with her as much.
You mean, besides updating her many profiles on dating sites, Facebook, etc.? Not really anymore. We used to go out and do cultural things we both enjoyed-- ballet, symphony, plays. Now she only wants to do that if there might be a good "candidate pool" (as she calls it.) I don't hang out with her as much.
The only reason she goes places is if she thinks she might meet someone? That's kind of crazy... I don't think I'd want to be friends with someone that obsessed.
You mean, besides updating her many profiles on dating sites, Facebook, etc.? Not really anymore. We used to go out and do cultural things we both enjoyed-- ballet, symphony, plays. Now she only wants to do that if there might be a good "candidate pool" (as she calls it.) I don't hang out with her as much.
I don't call those hobbies. I call that obsessing. My friend isn't on any pay sites, but he does the same stuff, except he has a few hobbies.
She needs to get out and see the world without it being the sole purpose of hunting for men.
OP I'm completely and utterly baffled by this thread
Any attractive woman can post a message on any dating site and get 50,000 responses within a day
I'm assuming she goes on a lot of dates every week but turns them all off with her attitude? I've always been baffled by women who can't find a partner. Is it just a matter of being incredibly incredibly incredibly picky (which is totally reasonable) so you have a tiny dating pool? Or is it about having a wide dating pool but not being able to keep any man because you have a psycho personality
OP I'm completely and utterly baffled by this thread
Any attractive woman can post a message on any dating site and get 50,000 responses within a day
I'm assuming she goes on a lot of dates every week but turns them all off with her attitude? I've always been baffled by women who can't find a partner. Is it just a matter of being incredibly incredibly incredibly picky (which is totally reasonable) so you have a tiny dating pool? Or is it about having a wide dating pool but not being able to keep any man because you have a psycho personality
Yep. All single women are crazy or too picky. You nailed it. You know SOOO much about women.
Yep. All single women are crazy or too picky. You nailed it. You know SOOO much about women.
I've seen dating experiments done just on online dating sites with guys posing as fake attractive women and they get about 50,000 responses seemingly in a day. Sure, some of those guys are not attractive enough/compatible enough in terms of appearance, age, etc... and some of them are just looking to get a laid but mathematically speaking, at least a small percentage of them have to be attractive, personable men with decent jobs and normal lifestyles looking for a girlfriend. How is it so hard just to date those men until one of them wants to be exclusive?
It's gotta be 3 things
1)A woman is socially retarded and can't generate any chemistry with normal, personable guys and then turns them down because she finds them boring
2)A woman is looking for something astonishingly specific
3)She's crazy and scares off men before there is a chance for something to develop
So which is it OP?
Any attractive woman can go on 7 dates a week off any online dating site, how can you not find a partner based on that?
I am pretty confident that I could find a girlfriend with just a few dates
I'm assuming she goes on a lot of dates every week but turns them all off with her attitude?
Oh my word, did you just imply that a woman got rejected by a man?!
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