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Old 12-18-2012, 04:26 AM
 
1,429 posts, read 2,278,628 times
Reputation: 1897

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I would really love to hear from parents with adult children who have been through a divorce..

My exwife and I have been divorced for over 2 months. She currently has a "serious" boyfriend, who has met her family and appears to get a long with everyone.

My ex-MIL contacted me last week, I wasn't able to answer the phone (work), but she left a voice mail about wanting to get me something for x-mas - be it her coming over and cleaning the house, or helping organize things for me, at the house.

I haven't responded.

I'm very torn because I've known them for over 10 years, had plenty of ups/downs with them, they were my family at one point.

Now they're not.

This other guy is in the picture now - and I'm out.

Am I really suppose to just say "bye" to them, and have that be the end?

Or is there some type of loose communication that usually goes on? We're all defriended from facebook, but I'm honestly very curious what's going on with them.

Is that a feeling I should just kill, and move on, and let them move on with the new guy - ?

Edit -

This is also about her sisters/my (ex) nephew.
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Old 12-18-2012, 04:30 AM
 
Location: a primitive state
10,674 posts, read 22,127,554 times
Reputation: 15125
Just tell her thanks but it's not necessary. Cleaning your house is a little too personal. If she needs to talk, why don't you take her to lunch?
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Old 12-18-2012, 05:18 AM
 
Location: Ostend,Belgium....
8,829 posts, read 6,804,680 times
Reputation: 4920
tell her thanks but no thanks, I agree with ellie, lunch would be better
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Old 12-18-2012, 05:25 AM
 
16,141 posts, read 22,497,566 times
Reputation: 26703
If you were contacted she is reaching out to keep you included. If you do want to stay in touch, this is your chance. If you have a nephew that you have a great relationship w/ I'd really consider it. The ball is in your court. If you don't contact her, they will likely not try again, thinking you've rebuffed them.
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Old 12-18-2012, 05:34 AM
 
Location: Way up high
18,845 posts, read 24,345,375 times
Reputation: 23638
I agree with what others have said. She's reaching out to you. But do it at your desire like lunch/dinner etc. Just because you are divorced it doesn't mean you have to cut them out of your life. I've kept in touch with my ex's mom all this time because we had a fabulous relationship
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Old 12-18-2012, 05:46 AM
 
Location: Atlanta & NYC
6,616 posts, read 12,759,492 times
Reputation: 6637
Divorced for two months and she already has a serious boyfriend? Good riddance in my opinion. Cut ties with the family and move on.
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Old 12-18-2012, 06:19 AM
 
27,531 posts, read 35,687,656 times
Reputation: 25446
no.
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Old 12-18-2012, 06:23 AM
 
28,900 posts, read 50,191,073 times
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If you liked them, then by all means continue the relationship. Good people are too scarce in the world to be disposable. But cleaning your apartment is a very weird thing. Offer lunch instead.
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Old 12-18-2012, 06:49 AM
 
177 posts, read 381,476 times
Reputation: 339
Don't let her clean your home, but you can give her a call and say thanks for the offer. The mom probably feels bad that you are alone at Christmas and she knows her daughter is moving too fast.

It's weird, but if you like them, a few phone calls a year won't do any damage. It'll phase out eventually on its own, especially when you get into another relationship. Good luck!
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Old 12-18-2012, 07:45 AM
 
76 posts, read 111,081 times
Reputation: 133
Say No on the house cleaning or organizing. The ex-MIL may be nice but that offer of hers just seems "too nice" of her.

Generally I do not trust people that are "too nice" I think they may be up to something, like gathering info from you for the pot stirring.
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