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No, you missed my point. I simply suggested a theory that maybe tv shows and movies these days alter young girl's perceptions of their "perfect guy" and that any guy with less than brad pitt looks, charm, or bad boy lifestyle isn't worth dating. Certainly not all but I'd say good amount of American girls.
Even as a teen I knew the difference between fantasy and reality. I don't ever recall meeting any girl or woman who was holding out for someone of movie star quality, or was holding men to the standards portrayed in a Hollywood rom-com. I have met several guys who were expecting Sports Illustrated swimsuit models though.
No, you missed my point. I simply suggested a theory that maybe tv shows and movies these days alter young girl's perceptions of their "perfect guy" and that any guy with less than brad pitt looks, charm, and a bad boy lifestyle isn't worth dating. Certainly not all but I'd say good amount of American girls. I don't think girls should date wimpy over pleasing nice guys either, but what's wrong with dating confident guys with a good head on their shoulders?
most people i know have been in at least one serious relationship by age 24. but yea clearly its everyone else at fault and not you
Good for you, I said some, certainly not all women in this day and age. It was just something that struck me with my online dating experience, I've ran into plenty of profiles and women themselves who have literally a shopping list of prerequisites (must be built, 6'2 or taller, good job, dark hair, blue eyes, muscular, six pack, and very interesting or more). Funny thing is the woman herself while perhaps attractive isn't quite a victoria's secret model herself.
Good for you, I said some, certainly not all women in this day and age. It was just something that struck me with my online dating experience, I've ran into plenty of profiles and women themselves who have literally a shopping list of prerequisites (must be built, 6'2 or taller, good job, dark hair, blue eyes, muscular, six pack, and very interesting or more). Funny thing is the woman herself while perhaps attractive isn't quite a victoria's secret model herself.
sounds like you're the one who doesn't understand the difference between fantasy and reality. there is a huge difference between what someone will say they want if asked for a "list", and what they will actually be ok with in real life.
I agree with the OP and his dilemma mirrors mine exactly. I'm 24, very built 6 ft tall and very attractive (according to half my dates) . At 20 I wasn't too concerned and too busy in college but now, I just graduated, have a steady good paying job so I jumped into online dating since May. I also go talk to girls in the clubs/bars every few weekends but I've definitely found more success online. I've probably been on about 20 dates since then and some dating relationships lasted a few weeks, some a month, some not even a week but the end result was always the same. It just didn't work out. Most of these girls I was interested in taking the relationship somewhere, some I weren't. The other ones I wasn't interested in..... I still responded to them, some are even still my friends. It's rude to just completely ignore someone.
Psh ...one girl we danced had fun, made out, held hands, we clicked pretty well. She wanted me to come to her place and I told her it was late and let's save that for the next date. I asked her back out....she kept saying she was busy and she'd get back to me. I never heard from here again..... The ones I was interested in ended up just like the OP's situation, they eventually start flaking and/or don't respond. It's frustrating for sure. It gets me to believe a lot of girls (especially with online dating) just want free food or just love the attention. I don't expect to be successful with every single girl I date, but odds are that 1 out of 20 would have at least led to some kind of relationship. Maybe modern media/feminism is to blame. Maybe the OP and I are both doing something wrong... going for the wrong girls or maybe we're just too "boring" or not interesting enough. Who knows. I certainly don't view my life as boring, I'm active into a lot of things, I've traveled the world and lived in 8 different places growing up. If these women want more, they should date a dare devil or a celebrity. Get real.
In my mind, I just move on and keep going. It's a numbers game, one is bound to click at some point. Maybe it'll take 100 dates, or 200. I don't know. That's my theory. There has to be a good girl for me and the OP out there somewhere.
Dude, I have so been in your situation! Look, I am just going to say it like it is and tell you. Both of you have a missed opportunity here. It seems like both girls were wanting to fool around and being that you guys wanted a relationship, you said no and rejected them, the girls then went looking elsewhere, found someone and hence they started ignoring you. I met a girl once for an online day, I took her out to eat, she wasn't the best looking girl, but she was already, she started flirting with me really hard core for a first date so I asked her if she wanted to get out of there and she said yes. I got a room and we did the deed, I didn't wait at all.
I think that women consider that kind of behavior of waiting to long to be typical "nice guy behavior" because i think the "alpha males" seize the day. These girls are living in the moment, not in the future like you and the OP might. I am not saying that it is right, but just like guys like to mess around, girls like to too. Maybe they were not looking for a relationship but a one night stand and you have to realize that a one night stand CAN turn into a relationship. I've seen it happen. As for the dating, well it is a numbers game. I have tried online and I have been successful, but not in the relationship department..just keep trying. Something is bound to happen eventually. Also, dating older women might help too because it sounds like you are stable and have your stuff together.
Reading their posts it's obvious the OP & hokiedude88 are boys not mature men. No self reflection whatsoever. It must be the womens fault is all I'm hearing.
I think that women consider that kind of behavior of waiting to long to be typical "nice guy behavior" because i think the "alpha males" seize the day. These girls are living in the moment, not in the future like you and the OP might. I am not saying that it is right, but just like guys like to mess around, girls like to too. Maybe they were not looking for a relationship but a one night stand and you have to realize that a one night stand CAN turn into a relationship. I've seen it happen. As for the dating, well it is a numbers game. I have tried online and I have been successful, but not in the relationship department..just keep trying. Something is bound to happen eventually. Also, dating older women might help too because it sounds like you are stable and have your stuff together.
Just for the record some of us like nice guys
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