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When meeting someone online, most people want to make sure the person in the profile picture is who they say they are and that they look like their picture in real life. I've heard of people investing their time, emotions and energy e-mailing potential dates for days, sometimes weeks, only to find out when they meet their online date in person that they don't look as attractive as their photograph or worse - they don't look anything like their picture.
We've already had discussions in this forum that looks DO matter in the initial dating phase. The obvious solution to the above situation would be to Skype or cam via Yahoo Messenger with the person in question to see them in real time and to hear their voice. As easy as this solution is, some people still aren't doing this for various reasons. Some people don't own a cam or mic, some people refuse to go on cam and others trust that the photographs they're being sent are genuine.
Have you ever Skyped or used Yahoo Messenger to cam with a potential date? If so, did you think they looked the same as their picture or better? Or did they look different than their photograph or worse?
And if you've never done this before or prefer not to, why?
When meeting someone online, most people want to make sure the person in the profile picture is who they say they are and that they look like their picture in real life. I've heard of people investing their time, emotions and energy e-mailing potential dates for days, sometimes weeks, only to find out when they meet their online date in person that they don't look as attractive as their photograph or worse - they don't look anything like their picture.
We've already had discussions in this forum that looks DO matter in the initial dating phase. The obvious solution to the above situation would be to Skype or cam via Yahoo Messenger with the person in question to see them in real time and to hear their voice. As easy as this solution is, some people still aren't doing this for various reasons. Some people don't own a cam or mic, some people refuse to go on cam and others trust that the photographs they're being sent are genuine.
Have you ever Skyped or used Yahoo Messenger to cam with a potential date? If so, did you think they looked the same as their picture or better? Or did they look different than their photograph or worse?
And if you've never done this before or prefer not to, why?
Yes.
It's especially good for people like me.....who are good looking in their picture, but still significantly better looking IRL.
I use yahoo but for IM only. I am not a fan of webcamming. I do meet in person right away though. Usually after a day or 2 of messaging online. If after a week there is still no face to face meet. I ignore the person totally.
I tried my new HD webcam in POF chat once, but aside from that I've never felt it was necessary to use since it's usually easy to spot the fakes and myspace angles. Would rather meet in person sooner than later.
You could find out what they look like in a 30 minute coffee date, no need to e-mail for "weeks and weeks" nor to webcam. If they are an hour or less away, just MEET and find out right away if there's anything there. Too many people, IMO, want some type of guarantee they're going to like the person before meeting. What do you have to lose but 30 minutes? It doesn't obligate you to anything. I never did chat or webcam or anything else before meeting when doing online dating, if they asked I just said I don't do chat. When I met my now bf, he sent me an e-mail saying "do you want to meet?", that's it. He lived 15 minutes away, so I said okay, we met for drinks and now we are over 2 years together. Cyber space is for meeting people, not getting to know them, it really doesn't have to be as complicated as people make it.
You could find out what they look like in a 30 minute coffee date, no need to e-mail for "weeks and weeks" nor to webcam. If they are an hour or less away, just MEET and find out right away if there's anything there. Too many people, IMO, want some type of guarantee they're going to like the person before meeting. What do you have to lose but 30 minutes? It doesn't obligate you to anything. I never did chat or webcam or anything else before meeting when doing online dating, if they asked I just said I don't do chat. When I met my now bf, he sent me an e-mail saying "do you want to meet?", that's it. He lived 15 minutes away, so I said okay, we met for drinks and now we are over 2 years together. Cyber space is for meeting people, not getting to know them, it really doesn't have to be as complicated as people make it.
This is true and a very smart thing for someone to do. But, I guess I should've been more specific in my post. I more or less meant if the two people in question were too far away to just hop in their car to meet at the nearest Starbucks. Unless people only e-mail or chat with other people within their locality, a lot of people unexpectedly happen upon someone that they like in a forum or dating site that, to their disappointment, lives hours away or resides hundreds of miles away from them.
This is true and a very smart thing for someone to do. But, I guess I should've been more specific in my post. I more or less meant if the two people in question were too far away to just hop in their car to meet at the nearest Starbucks. Unless people only e-mail or chat with other people within their locality, a lot of people unexpectedly happen upon someone that they like in a forum or dating site that, to their disappointment, lives hours away or resides hundreds of miles away from them.
Well that makes sense, although I would still be very cautious about establishing a false sense of relationship before meeting, so don't talk too much in that vein, and make sure you're looking for local people to date while you're talking with that person. I don't think it much matters what chat site, it's something you can decide individually as you are speaking with someone, it doesn't have to be affiliated with the dating site. I used to talk to people long distance, but after a couple of LD relationships realized I wanted someone nearby, there's nothing like having someone to go get a hug from on your way home from a crappy day of work, or who will evacuate with you during a storm (as I had to for Sandy) so decided to just focus on local. I went so far as to take a temp job in Texas once for 6 months, to see how it worked with a guy I was dating there, but realized I really don't want to leave my home, family and friends here. With him though, we used yahoo chat.
Well that makes sense, although I would still be very cautious about establishing a false sense of relationship before meeting, so don't talk too much in that vein, and make sure you're looking for local people to date while you're talking with that person. I don't think it much matters what chat site, it's something you can decide individually as you are speaking with someone, it doesn't have to be affiliated with the dating site. I used to talk to people long distance, but after a couple of LD relationships realized I wanted someone nearby, there's nothing like having someone to go get a hug from on your way home from a crappy day of work, or who will evacuate with you during a storm (as I had to for Sandy) so decided to just focus on local. I went so far as to take a temp job in Texas once for 6 months, to see how it worked with a guy I was dating there, but realized I really don't want to leave my home, family and friends here. With him though, we used yahoo chat.
Local is always best, but sometimes, life doesn't happen that way. I met my sweet sig on a tv show website and didn't realize he was over 800 miles away until after I fell for him. The distance between us was a challenge, but it didn't deter me from attempting to make a real connection to him or from trying to make a life with him. Sometimes, the person that an individual could be happy with and build a life with doesn't reside anywhere near them. Then they have to make a decision as to whether they want to pursue such a person or remain near their family and friends and keep on searching for someone in their locality. But, I see what you're saying and agree with it.
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Never Again. 
But, I guess I should've been more specific in my post. I more or less meant if the two people in question were too far away to just hop in their car to meet at the nearest Starbucks. Unless people only e-mail or chat with other people within their locality, a lot of people unexpectedly happen upon someone that they like in a forum or dating site that, to their disappointment, lives hours away or resides hundreds of miles away from them.
