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I would wonder why a 35 year old woman was interested in a 25 year old man instead of someone more her own age. If he was 35 and she was 45, it would be different. 25 year olds have a long way to go to "fit in" with most 35 year old people. Even the most mature aren't mature enough. I would think they were a party gal or bar hopper type looking for " a good time". He's 35 and they are 45-50? Bring it on then.
It would depend on the individual in question, but generally speaking I would never date a girl that much older than me. Honestly, I like being the older one in a relationship. Don't ask me why.
I agree. I think it's called being traditional, at least I think it is.
question is ARE YOU READY TO BEAR HIS CHILDREN and do you see him around raising his children with you.
Telling you this as a male, considered very good looking by all (and no, this isn't an attempt to look self-promotion), tall, masters degree in computer science, large salary in region... i spent all my life studying and working up until i went 25 years old, and was a virgin (and still am). My first company where i worked was a typical competing environment with all folks being guys older than me, and i worked during my studies as well, delaying my masters degree. When i graduated, I've moved into another company and it had several females. Don't get me wrong, I'm not retarded to get loose on mere sight of a woman, however I've got a "crush on first sight" of a person who happened to be my boss (which i found out later on... since she became boss after several months of my employment). And I've acted the same way as that guy. However, she was older than me, and that wouldn't be a problem by itself, it's lots of other things. The boss thing just complicated it, but within several months I've got over my "crush" and focused on work, mainly by avoiding contact, to get used. When she became my boss within half a year, it was kind of easier for me to avoid anything that may involve dating. She definitely knew i had a crush on her, but i NEVER wanted to make a move. If she made a move, i now know I'd possibly regret it for my whole life, and now after two years later i know it was the right decision to never engage in such things.
I've moved to another company and attained large salary, status, but that's the least concern, it's not just that I kept being focused on success, I'm focused on starting my own company within a year or two, with friends I've gathered over years. But it's not about being more successful at all, it's about some common sense.
I recall how many times I happened to send unfortunate signals towards her simply because I wasn't so good at interacting due to attraction... I'd simply mess it up when I'd speak about something to her, so after our conversation would end I'd figure out that she might think of some things as if i "checked the terrain" for the date, which was not true at all. Simply because I was nervous, I'd say things that might have been interpreted in totally different way, because it would cloud my mind at times... and I'd simply smile when i see her, my body would do it on it's own. Those are signs of attraction. And still NOT intention of getting involved.
I really don't know what would've happened if she proposed me a date... I guess I'd simply avoid it because I tried to avoid getting myself into such position, but seeing it from today's perspective, it's very possible that we'd get involved if she kept asking me out and my life would go totally different route. I tried to hide my nervousness during first few months and to not make any move at all which would've been considered as "trying to get a date".
So there you go, if the guy is even remotely similar to me, NO, HE PROBABLY RESISTS TO DATE YOU BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO DATE YOU, BUT HIS BODY TELLS HIM YOU'RE ATTRACTIVE TO HIM. Lust and love aren't the same thing, and people should've known that after they finish their high school, I guess.
Given the fact that she was older 8 years than me (making her 33 years at that point), a lot of things are involved if that was ever going to be a serious relationship. Trust me when i tell you that lots of guys at THAT stage are thinking of the following:
1. get a decent job
2. succeed on business plans if you can, dreaming of their own company
3. start a family (or if #2 never happens to see the light of the day, just save up some money and proceed to dating).
This is a perspective of people in Bosnia though.
Very similar to what women think, in many ways. Marrying an old woman is thus the WORST THING i can think of in a perspective now.
I see this as a very similar thing that could've happened in my life and this is why I'm posting this.
I can tell you more on private messages, this isn't to discourage from doing it, but to eventually give you some hints as a man on what that guy possibly thinks and how you will probably make a lifetime relationship if you do decide to ask him out.
question is ARE YOU READY TO BEAR HIS CHILDREN and do you see him around raising his children with you.
Telling you this as a male, considered very good looking by all (and no, this isn't an attempt to look self-promotion), tall, masters degree in computer science, large salary in region... i spent all my life studying and working up until i went 25 years old, and was a virgin (and still am). My first company where i worked was a typical competing environment with all folks being guys older than me, and i worked during my studies as well, delaying my masters degree. When i graduated, I've moved into another company and it had several females. Don't get me wrong, I'm not retarded to get loose on mere sight of a woman, however I've got a "crush on first sight" of a person who happened to be my boss (which i found out later on... since she became boss after several months of my employment). And I've acted the same way as that guy. However, she was older than me, and that wouldn't be a problem by itself, it's lots of other things. The boss thing just complicated it, but within several months I've got over my "crush" and focused on work, mainly by avoiding contact, to get used. When she became my boss within half a year, it was kind of easier for me to avoid anything that may involve dating. She definitely knew i had a crush on her, but i NEVER wanted to make a move. If she made a move, i now know I'd possibly regret it for my whole life, and now after two years later i know it was the right decision to never engage in such things.
I've moved to another company and attained large salary, status, but that's the least concern, it's not just that I kept being focused on success, I'm focused on starting my own company within a year or two, with friends I've gathered over years. But it's not about being more successful at all, it's about some common sense.
I recall how many times I happened to send unfortunate signals towards her simply because I wasn't so good at interacting due to attraction... I'd simply mess it up when I'd speak about something to her, so after our conversation would end I'd figure out that she might think of some things as if i "checked the terrain" for the date, which was not true at all. Simply because I was nervous, I'd say things that might have been interpreted in totally different way, because it would cloud my mind at times... and I'd simply smile when i see her, my body would do it on it's own. Those are signs of attraction. And still NOT intention of getting involved.
I really don't know what would've happened if she proposed me a date... I guess I'd simply avoid it because I tried to avoid getting myself into such position, but seeing it from today's perspective, it's very possible that we'd get involved if she kept asking me out and my life would go totally different route. I tried to hide my nervousness during first few months and to not make any move at all which would've been considered as "trying to get a date".
So there you go, if the guy is even remotely similar to me, NO, HE PROBABLY RESISTS TO DATE YOU BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO DATE YOU, BUT HIS BODY TELLS HIM YOU'RE ATTRACTIVE TO HIM. Lust and love aren't the same thing, and people should've known that after they finish their high school, I guess.
Given the fact that she was older 8 years than me (making her 33 years at that point), a lot of things are involved if that was ever going to be a serious relationship. Trust me when i tell you that lots of guys at THAT stage are thinking of the following:
1. get a decent job
2. succeed on business plans if you can, dreaming of their own company
3. start a family (or if #2 never happens to see the light of the day, just save up some money and proceed to dating).
This is a perspective of people in Bosnia though.
Very similar to what women think, in many ways. Marrying an old woman is thus the WORST THING i can think of in a perspective now.
I see this as a very similar thing that could've happened in my life and this is why I'm posting this.
I can tell you more on private messages, this isn't to discourage from doing it, but to eventually give you some hints as a man on what that guy possibly thinks and how you will probably make a lifetime relationship if you do decide to ask him out.
Oh for gods sake! They find each other attractive and could possibly have some fun dates! No one needs to be thinking about bearing children at this point!
Oh for gods sake! They find each other attractive and could possibly have some fun dates! No one needs to be thinking about bearing children at this point!
You are really funny. She is 35 years old. If that isn't old, then i don't know what you're speaking about. Make sure to know that they'd need at least one year to get to know each other. Another nine months to have a child, make it a year. 37 year old delivering a child. Check out what you're speaking. The guy SHOULD think about it if he's serious at all. Maybe they don't speak about it in your house regarding all the problems, miscarriages, or even children with problems that even modern technology won't be able to scan during pregnancy, which can affect their lives.
If it's "just sex and attraction" then that's something else. I'm not into that type of relationship at all. In my country there's a saying that you can't change a man on how he's raised and that's it. That being said, he could get to know her better, but if I were him, I'd keep my distance, I'd need a serious reason why to even get involved. And she would need to give that reason.
And old saying goes like this - "watch the mother, marry her daughter". I don't know what's so wrong with this, if he has any brain his mother should've given him those advices. In my place it's usually another woman in family giving boys advices, while another man giving advices to girls on how to spot problems and how to judge whom to go with.
NO. Especially at 25. A decent looking 25 y.o. guy has choices.
I am not attracted to older women. I like the rule: 2 up and 5 down, +/-
Not all men are attracted to the same things.
I don't really find men much older than me attractive. Not regularly, anyway.
My husband is 13 years younger than me. We are compatible for a variety of reasons. He's always been attracted to somewhat older women. It's not that he found younger ones unattractive. He just prefers women who are more stable, yet still know how to have fun.
That tended to be older women back when he was 24. That's when we met. I was 37.
We've been together for 8 years. Married for almost 3.
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I don't really find men much older than me attractive. Not regularly, anyway.
My husband is 13 years younger than me. We are compatible for a variety of reasons. He's always been attracted to somewhat older women. It's not that he found younger ones unattractive. He just prefers women who are more stable, yet still know how to have fun.
That tended to be older women back when he was 24. That's when we met. I was 37.
We've been together for 8 years. Married for almost 3.
Still, I was chomping at the bit when that friend's "little" brother reneged on his education which would have put some great letters after his name. I told him "Get out of it and go to school!" He now regrets his decision to marry and not go to professional school. If it's Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore, and they're both actors and rich, then it doesn't matter. Still, that also went by the wayside. But, then, that's the entertainment industry, so that's not a good barometer of anything.
I prefer to be 0-5 years younger than the guy I'm with but things don't always turn out perfectly like that so I'm flexible (as long as we're attracted to each other and have share values).
Still, I was chomping at the bit when that friend's "little" brother reneged on his education which would have put some great letters after his name. I told him "Get out of it and go to school!" He now regrets his decision to marry and not go to professional school.If it's Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore, and they're both actors and rich, then it doesn't matter. Still, that also went by the wayside. But, then, that's the entertainment industry, so that's not a good barometer of anything.
[Re. the bolded part of the quote above, about Hollywood marriages.] True...athough, there are also the rare "happily-ever-after", more lasting Hollywood marriages too, though One concrete example: Kevin Sorbo, who played Hercules in "Hercules: The Legendary Journeys", has been remained successfully married to his wife, Sam Jenkins, since their wedding in 1998 They also have 3 children together. These are the kinds of movie star couples that I honestly very much admire!
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A decent looking 25 y.o. guy has choices. 
