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question is ARE YOU READY TO BEAR HIS CHILDREN and do you see him around raising his children with you.
Telling you this as a male, considered very good looking by all (and no, this isn't an attempt to look self-promotion), tall, masters degree in computer science, large salary in region... i spent all my life studying and working up until i went 25 years old, and was a virgin (and still am). My first company where i worked was a typical competing environment with all folks being guys older than me, and i worked during my studies as well, delaying my masters degree. When i graduated, I've moved into another company and it had several females. Don't get me wrong, I'm not retarded to get loose on mere sight of a woman, however I've got a "crush on first sight" of a person who happened to be my boss (which i found out later on... since she became boss after several months of my employment). And I've acted the same way as that guy. However, she was older than me, and that wouldn't be a problem by itself, it's lots of other things. The boss thing just complicated it, but within several months I've got over my "crush" and focused on work, mainly by avoiding contact, to get used. When she became my boss within half a year, it was kind of easier for me to avoid anything that may involve dating. She definitely knew i had a crush on her, but i NEVER wanted to make a move. If she made a move, i now know I'd possibly regret it for my whole life, and now after two years later i know it was the right decision to never engage in such things.
I've moved to another company and attained large salary, status, but that's the least concern, it's not just that I kept being focused on success, I'm focused on starting my own company within a year or two, with friends I've gathered over years. But it's not about being more successful at all, it's about some common sense.
I recall how many times I happened to send unfortunate signals towards her simply because I wasn't so good at interacting due to attraction... I'd simply mess it up when I'd speak about something to her, so after our conversation would end I'd figure out that she might think of some things as if i "checked the terrain" for the date, which was not true at all. Simply because I was nervous, I'd say things that might have been interpreted in totally different way, because it would cloud my mind at times... and I'd simply smile when i see her, my body would do it on it's own. Those are signs of attraction. And still NOT intention of getting involved.
I really don't know what would've happened if she proposed me a date... I guess I'd simply avoid it because I tried to avoid getting myself into such position, but seeing it from today's perspective, it's very possible that we'd get involved if she kept asking me out and my life would go totally different route. I tried to hide my nervousness during first few months and to not make any move at all which would've been considered as "trying to get a date".
So there you go, if the guy is even remotely similar to me, NO, HE PROBABLY RESISTS TO DATE YOU BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO DATE YOU, BUT HIS BODY TELLS HIM YOU'RE ATTRACTIVE TO HIM. Lust and love aren't the same thing, and people should've known that after they finish their high school, I guess.
Given the fact that she was older 8 years than me (making her 33 years at that point), a lot of things are involved if that was ever going to be a serious relationship. Trust me when i tell you that lots of guys at THAT stage are thinking of the following:
1. get a decent job
2. succeed on business plans if you can, dreaming of their own company
3. start a family (or if #2 never happens to see the light of the day, just save up some money and proceed to dating).
This is a perspective of people in Bosnia though.
Very similar to what women think, in many ways. Marrying an old woman is thus the WORST THING i can think of in a perspective now.
I see this as a very similar thing that could've happened in my life and this is why I'm posting this.
I can tell you more on private messages, this isn't to discourage from doing it, but to eventually give you some hints as a man on what that guy possibly thinks and how you will probably make a lifetime relationship if you do decide to ask him out.
Curious why you said "if she looked younger than her age"....? Is there something wrong with aging?
I have a younger man actively pursuing me right now....19 years younger. We both are mature adults... but I likely look my age! How else could I look?? (He knows my age too)
BTW: My hair is a lovely salt-pepper-white-gray.....no need to cover up the truth! Be authentic
So there!
Quote:
Originally Posted by ladyturquoise
Few months ago, a new guy started at my company. He is very attractive but I found him too young for me. The thing is that I noticed that he gets very shy with me, greeting me with his head down looking to the floor and even ignoring me for no reason... I never flirted with him , always being friendly and kind... The other day I initiated a casual conversation with him, he gave me this glance over(you know the Up and down look) and smiled at me, and seemed sort of nervous. Or if I try to start a friendly chat with him he looks into my eyes and smiles...I'm sure he knows that i'm older than him, but not sure if he is afraid of me, or just wants to hide his feelings??? He asked me casually if I had plans for the weekend , which I replied with: " no nothing important". Did he want to find out if i had a bf or was he asking me out indirectly??? I am afraid that the age difference will be refraining him from trying to show his true intentions!!! Your opinions are welcome...
Few months ago, a new guy started at my company. He is very attractive but I found him too young for me. The thing is that I noticed that he gets very shy with me, greeting me with his head down looking to the floor and even ignoring me for no reason... I never flirted with him , always being friendly and kind... The other day I initiated a casual conversation with him, he gave me this glance over(you know the Up and down look) and smiled at me, and seemed sort of nervous. Or if I try to start a friendly chat with him he looks into my eyes and smiles...I'm sure he knows that i'm older than him, but not sure if he is afraid of me, or just wants to hide his feelings??? He asked me casually if I had plans for the weekend , which I replied with: " no nothing important". Did he want to find out if i had a bf or was he asking me out indirectly??? I am afraid that the age difference will be refraining him from trying to show his true intentions!!! Your opinions are welcome...
Since I'm 61 1/2 dating someone 10 years older than me would mean I'm cruising the nursing homes and that just icky.
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(He knows my age too)
It depends ....
