Quote:
Originally Posted by Jadel812
As a woman, I have always felt that my children should know who their paternal father is. My children thank God, has a wonderful realtionship with their dad even though we are divorced.
Needless to say, that isn't always the case in all relationships. Often times there are men who are faced to support a child whom they thought was their biological child, I honestly do not agree with this IF the man was not aware that the child was not his.
Imagine being married or committed to someone and a child is born of that relationship, imagine having braking up with that child's mother but still fulfilling your paternal role only to find out many years later and fights for increased child support that the child was never actually your child.
Do you think that the law should require that any woman who intentionally lied to a man about having fathered a child should be forced to pay back all the years of child support that was paid to her for that child?
Do you feel that the law should still require the man to pay child support even after testing has shown that he is actually NOT the biological father?
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You are right in many ways. But some guys make the choice to 'disappear' after a child turns up. After my first divorce , my ex just disappeared for several years. As the girls got older they were aware that the dad they had was a stepdad and all I could tell them of the real dad was what he was like before he disappeared and couldnt speculate on what he may be doing or where he was. No child support was ordered, as back then I didnt ask for it knowing he wouldnt pay anyway and they didnt enforce it like they do now.
It got to finally my oldest wanted to know where her dad was. She had gone as far as getting hold of the Maury Show (a daytime talk show), where they do this type of thing, to find him. Until some friends of mine told me they have p.i.'s in their office (theyre attorneys here in Calif) and could put one of them on the case for a very affordable price. I didnt think of that before because its very expensive but they offered too good of a price to turn down. Getting to the point, they contacted her a month later, and they found him. He was alive and well, and the reunion was so heartwarming. Long story short, to this day, we get along great, he had completely turned his life around (for the better) and they are closer now than ever.
Some guys though, make the choice to step out and not look back, not take on the responsibility, but then they complain they cant see the kid when they are the one who ran off and 'hid' for one reason or other. Fathers do have rights, granted, but they either need to show they want that and accept responsibility, or step out and legally waive that right if they dont want the obligations that come with it. The choice is usually under their control.
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a father says NO to visitation
