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Old 02-12-2013, 01:24 PM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,901 posts, read 42,538,579 times
Reputation: 42762

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdrop93 View Post
The white dress is also a sign of sexual purity.

I mean - I think it's dumb. But I also think that saying that all divorced men are failures is dumb.
I guess I was confused why anybody would seriously question anyone, particularly a 40-year-old woman, about wearing white in church. The church does not care if you are a virgin, unless perhaps you're marrying royalty or something.

 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:25 PM
 
12,535 posts, read 15,144,685 times
Reputation: 29087
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
The fact he isn't a failure at marriage. A divorced one is. Not to mention she will never be his true love.
Ah ha! So that's what this is about--competing with the past!
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:25 PM
 
Location: Minneapolis (St. Louis Park)
5,993 posts, read 10,126,264 times
Reputation: 4401
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
On this site, several told me that I should date divorced dads (and divorced men in general)because they have experience. I would respond if they are so good why are they divorced and failed? Especially when it comes to divorced dads, these guys failed at something that is going to hurt the kids, what would be a good thing about them?
"Failing" is an odd way to view it. Who failed -- mom or dad? Sometimes people make mistakes. Sometimes people change or grow apart. Sometimes life events cause relationships to drastically alter. You don't know what it's like until you've experienced these things yourself, but try to be more open-minded about meeting new people......you may find that the BEST people to date are those who have already tried and failed but learned and are willing to get on their feet and try again!
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:26 PM
 
Location: Minneapolis (St. Louis Park)
5,993 posts, read 10,126,264 times
Reputation: 4401
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
As long as people keep telling me I should be dating these men. I find it highly offensive when people tell me to date divorced dads.
Then don't read those threads! You act as if people are FORCING you to do these things!!
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:26 PM
 
4,380 posts, read 4,431,638 times
Reputation: 4437
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
The fact he isn't a failure at marriage. A divorced one is.
He isn't a failure at marriage because he's never had the opportunity to be one if he's never actually tried it. That doesn't automatically mean he will be successfully married if he does get married.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
Not to mention she will never be his true love.
Not necessarily. A friend of mine is in her 60's. She was divorced and in her 40's when she met her current husband. She has told me on more than one occasion that it took her 42 years to meet the love of her life and the way she looks at him speaks volumes that those who came before him might as well not have existed.
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:26 PM
 
27,957 posts, read 39,581,788 times
Reputation: 26197
Idontdateyou... As someome whose divorced and very much a man I am passing all sorts of judgment on the self righteous holier than thou mentality. No use for the self proclaimed elite by devine appointment.

If ever in the market and you were sniffing around and pretending to be interested I'd tell you to pound salt.
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:28 PM
 
4,217 posts, read 7,275,762 times
Reputation: 5372
Quote:
Originally Posted by SD4020 View Post
If ever in the market and you were sniffing around and pretending to be interested I'd tell you to pound salt.
My guess is, most men would.
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:29 PM
 
Location: Minneapolis (St. Louis Park)
5,993 posts, read 10,126,264 times
Reputation: 4401
Quote:
Originally Posted by TaoistDude View Post
Often it's the divorced mother who failed to preserve the marriage and left the man. You may be lumping the good with the bad, but of course there's no easy way to tell.

On the flip side, single - and divorced - men are often uninterested in divorced - or sigle - mothers.
If I am to date again, I would LOVE to be meeting divorced women and/or mothers! It's almost preferred!!
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:34 PM
 
Location: Houston area
836 posts, read 1,110,310 times
Reputation: 1856
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idon'tdateyou View Post
On this site, several told me that I should date divorced dads (and divorced men in general)because they have experience. I would respond if they are so good why are they divorced and failed? Especially when it comes to divorced dads, these guys failed at something that is going to hurt the kids, what would be a good thing about them?

My experience is that divorced men I met were still in love with their ex and couldn't get over the divorce. This doesn't make for a good partner. I also found that the men I asked about their marriage didn't know what went wrong. All in all, I found that divorced men had a lot of pain that they hadn't dealt with and this made it difficult for them to find what they wanted.
 
Old 02-12-2013, 01:34 PM
 
10,029 posts, read 10,856,170 times
Reputation: 5944
Quote:
Originally Posted by NWGirl74 View Post
So a man who puts you down, belittles you at every turn and treats you like crap is a good man simply because he's never married and doesn't have kids so he has morals, but the man who got married in the church at 25 and is now a divorced 45 year old who is fighting for sole custody because his ex is an unhinged lunatic he doesn't feel is fit to be a parent is a bad man with no morals. Got it.

I think what people are trying to stress is divorced men aren't as black and white as you'd make it out to be.
Well neither one is a man for me.
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