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Old 03-10-2013, 10:02 AM
 
4,176 posts, read 5,747,119 times
Reputation: 1855

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie View Post
"busy" is a euphemism for wanting an easy way out of dating someone they are not interested in. If he/she is interested in you, all that busy is eliminated.
100% right!!!!!!
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Old 03-10-2013, 11:57 AM
 
Location: Oakland, CA
28,095 posts, read 32,197,938 times
Reputation: 28189
Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
Um, I am busy. I own a house that requires maintenance. My job is a minimum of 50 hours a week. I have a lot of friends. I have a dog I'm training for competition and taking classes with. I'm on a pub trivia team. I enjoy creative writing and reading books. And now that it's spring and my injuries from the autumn have healed, my workout regime is starting up again.

I've never specifically state it in my online profile that I'm "busy," but I make it pretty clear my life has a lot going on in it. I will carve out time in my life for another person, for sure, but I'm not going to be expecting to be texting all day or talking on the phone for hours or seeing someone several times a week.

My current relationship is a little TOO hands-off for me (he's just as busy as I am), but that's way better than being with someone who I have to constantly turn down because they want to spend every moment together.
Being busy (with a full life) is a good way to weed out people who don't have anything to do, and are looking for you to create an "instant" life with you if you will. I have been on a few dates with people like this.

They start hinting with stuff like "that sounds really fun. It sounds like you have lots of friends....I can't wait to meet them and join you in those outings." In the first 10 minutes of meeting.

I always find, I don't get along with people that don't stay "busy." They end up being too clingy for me.
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Old 03-10-2013, 01:31 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,605 posts, read 53,233,963 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie View Post
"Busy" is a euphemism for wanting an easy way out of dating someone they are not interested in. If he/she is interested in you, all that busy is eliminated.

I think using family drama is a easy way out. I don't think BUSY flies over too well anymore
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Old 03-10-2013, 01:33 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,605 posts, read 53,233,963 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
No. Two jobs means you will do what is necessary to take care of yourself and you're not looking for some guy to take care of you.

You appear to think two jobs is something someone should be ashamed of.

I just don't think he needs to be broadcast. If you are doing what;s necessary to take care of yourself then do that. The person will find out eventually if they talk to you long enough.
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Old 03-10-2013, 01:39 PM
 
4,176 posts, read 5,747,119 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Danes View Post
I have seen this too many times on profiles.

If you're that busy, why are you "looking" for a relationship?


Is "being busy" some sort of a status symbol?
A person who wants to spend time with you will spend time with you, regardless of how busy that person is.

A person who does not want to spend time with you will not spend time with you, regardless of how much free time that person has.
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Old 03-10-2013, 01:40 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,605 posts, read 53,233,963 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by LIS123 View Post
A person who wants to spend time with you will spend time with you, regardless of how busy that person is.

A person who does not want to spend time with you will not spend time with you, regardless of how much free time that person has.

Thank you, statement of 2013 on this site so far
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Old 03-10-2013, 04:20 PM
 
1,839 posts, read 2,690,428 times
Reputation: 1100
I think a lot of people go online thinking they want a relationship but not really wanting to make the effort to have one. They are looking for an easy fix and saying they are busy (in some cases, because they all probably have different reasons for saying they are) is a heads up that they don't want to invest a lot of time and effort in developing relationship. Maybe they just want to hang out and hope they really click with someone effortlessly.
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Old 03-10-2013, 06:03 PM
 
12,539 posts, read 13,445,893 times
Reputation: 28945
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnny Danes View Post
I have seen this too many times on profiles.

If you're that busy, why are you "looking" for a relationship?


Is "being busy" some sort of a status symbol?
They just want attention from strangers on the Internet writing to them.
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Old 03-10-2013, 06:21 PM
 
Location: So Cal
44,648 posts, read 43,638,508 times
Reputation: 45746
Agreed, if you're so busy, why bother trying to date??

I do realize that a lot of people do actually have busy lives, but I also think that sometimes peoples ego's get in the way and it can be a form of bragging....... IDK... hard to explain it really....
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Old 03-10-2013, 07:09 PM
 
4,176 posts, read 5,747,119 times
Reputation: 1855
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound View Post
Agreed, if you're so busy, why bother trying to date??

I do realize that a lot of people do actually have busy lives, but I also think that sometimes peoples ego's get in the way and it can be a form of bragging....... IDK... hard to explain it really....
They're not too busy; they're just trying to inflate their own egos (and others' perception of how 'important' they are), in addition to having a pre-made excuse for blowing off people they're not interested in.
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