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Old 01-25-2016, 08:39 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
39,044 posts, read 27,462,475 times
Reputation: 15954

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Msmommy22 View Post
Obviously, relationships should not be based 100% on sex. However, would you be able to stay with someone if their sex was not pleasing you. What if they only were able to provide you with good sex when they were drunk? If you were to break up with them would you tell them the reason that you no longer wanted to be with them was because their sex was not good?
For almost 2 years, i got used to go to the bathroom and finish myself by myself because my ex boyfriend couldn't perform due to medical hardship. I was okay with it temporarily (well, if you call 2 years temporary)

I honestly thought I could handle it, I had shower head and toys. Then since his parents were heavily involved with our relationship, I became increasingly resentful. After he got better, I broke up with him for good.

Now, I am with a man who is good in every way possible. He's a very giving, good, caring, kind, passionate lover, he is also a very giving, good, caring, kind, passionate man. I realize that not every man is the same. Some men are just better in bed. (some say it is a myth, all you need is practice) I don't know. I just think there are men better out there or maybe just better for me.

Bad sex will not be reason enough for me to break up, but if other things don't go well in a relationship. I can totally understand the women get more and more frustrated and resentful. It is just a matter of time for anybody to reach breaking point. Eventually, both suffer anyway.

No, I would not tell the real reason of breakup. I will just move on. I have found the man who is perfect for me.
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Old 01-25-2016, 08:43 AM
 
Location: Newport Beach, California
39,044 posts, read 27,462,475 times
Reputation: 15954
Quote:
Originally Posted by timberline742 View Post
No, practice does not make perfect. And lots of things, like chemistry, can't be taught. This is a myth in near all aspects of life.
I agree with this 100%
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Old 01-25-2016, 09:51 AM
 
Location: Sputnik Planitia
7,826 posts, read 11,752,083 times
Reputation: 9045
Quote:
Originally Posted by ocnjgirl View Post
When I say intimacy in THIS context I am talking more about the connection and feeling of closeness between the two people during the act, which is for me most intense during intercourse.
But then again some people have one night stands without any bonding, prostitutes have sex with multiple people a night without any sort of bond with their clients etc. etc. so isn't the physical closeness not what counts but rather the mental closeness which is actually giving any sort of meaning to the physical closeness? So without the emotional connection the PIV act itself may not mean anything in and of itself?
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Old 01-25-2016, 09:53 AM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,838,343 times
Reputation: 40634
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374 View Post
But then again some people have one night stands without any bonding, prostitutes have sex with multiple people a night without any sort of bond with their clients etc. etc. so isn't the physical closeness not what counts but rather the mental closeness which is actually giving any sort of meaning to the physical closeness? So without the emotional connection the PIV act itself may not mean anything in and of itself?

I've had 5 year sexual relationships and friendships with women where (unfortunately) they didn't bond with me at all. Everyone is different. And ever situation is different. I can sleep with someone and that will increase a bond, or have no affect on a bond. One never knows.
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Old 01-25-2016, 09:54 AM
 
8,168 posts, read 3,110,043 times
Reputation: 4500
Quote:
Originally Posted by Msmommy22 View Post
Obviously, relationships should not be based 100% on sex. However, would you be able to stay with someone if their sex was not pleasing you. What if they only were able to provide you with good sex when they were drunk? If you were to break up with them would you tell them the reason that you no longer wanted to be with them was because their sex was not good?
The answer(s) can be found in the root cause(s).
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Old 01-25-2016, 10:05 AM
 
50,489 posts, read 36,126,975 times
Reputation: 76359
Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia View Post
An arm? Dear me. Please remember you don't speak for all women ... you don't even speak for all heterosexual women.
The post I was responding to said something about "other appendages". I was saying another appendage would not be the same. I actually think my opinion on intercourse and the connection it builds speaks for the majority of women. Maybe you prefer other appendages and get the same feeling of closeness from them, I do not.
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Old 01-25-2016, 10:14 AM
 
50,489 posts, read 36,126,975 times
Reputation: 76359
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374 View Post
But then again some people have one night stands without any bonding, prostitutes have sex with multiple people a night without any sort of bond with their clients etc. etc. so isn't the physical closeness not what counts but rather the mental closeness which is actually giving any sort of meaning to the physical closeness? So without the emotional connection the PIV act itself may not mean anything in and of itself?
Don't get me wrong, I can and do have sex without meaning, and I don't think sex without intercourse isn't good..heck I don't even finish via penetration....but the argument was that intercourse is no different than any other type of sex when it comes to a sense of closeness with someone you love and for most women I happen to believe the sense of 2 people being as one is one of the things that creates a feeling of closeness with a man ....without it, I would feel something missing, a bond that intercourse creates that I just happen to feel deepens the connection between a man and woman who WANT that connection. Obviously one night stands and prostitutes and casual sex are not the topic here. If it's a one night stand it doesn't matter if they're bad in bed, you don't have to decide whether to end a relationship in that case because there really isn't one to speak of.
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Old 01-26-2016, 12:15 AM
 
Location: Sputnik Planitia
7,826 posts, read 11,752,083 times
Reputation: 9045
What if you were dating an amazing guy for a,year and then due to an accident it was determined that he could never have intercourse again, would you leave him?
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Old 01-26-2016, 12:50 AM
 
Location: Sodo Sopa at The Villas above Kenny' s House.
2,492 posts, read 3,022,276 times
Reputation: 3911
Quote:
Originally Posted by pittsflyer View Post
Great sex is like 80-90% of the reason that I wade through the manuar that is the dating and relationship game and because I am not super great looking myself I had to date and marry in a lower leauge so yea the sex better be great or I am out.
I've read this twice now. Lower league? Really?
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Old 01-26-2016, 08:59 PM
 
4,236 posts, read 8,112,583 times
Reputation: 10208
Quote:
Originally Posted by k374 View Post
What if you were dating an amazing guy for a,year and then due to an accident it was determined that he could never have intercourse again, would you leave him?
Does he still have utility value and does his tongue work? This might be a factor for some ladies
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